08-21-2024, 10:39 AM
(08-21-2024, 09:55 AM)Shannon Wrote:(08-21-2024, 09:39 AM)callie Wrote: I’m aware of what my root issues are, for the most part. They need to be addressed by helping me forgive myself and by grieving my past. That’s why I’m using E6 in the first place
I’m emotionally closed off. I’ve been that way since running OFv4 and OGSFv1. I don’t blame the subs, though - I ran them in ultrasonic, a format that has always felt too forcing for me, and I’ve never been able to stick with it long-term because the pacing is just too fast for me. I blame myself for ignoring my instincts and pushing forward despite the increasing dissociation. I should never have used E6 in ultrasonic to begin with
Regarding your comment that subliminals might not be the right path for me, I have a question. When I decided to purchase a subscription to E6, I experienced wonderful TID the very next day - I felt at peace with myself, and everything felt so alive. If that can happen as TID, doesn’t that suggest it’s a possible outcome, since (correct me if I'm wrong) TID is essentially a glimpse of a 'future' self manifesting in your current timeline?
TID is an odd phenomenon that results from one of the modules, which causes you to experience the program's effects before you start using the program.
The ultrasonic being too fast paced - you must be dealing with a very, very early part of yourself if you think that. The script is the same in all formats and the script instructs you to go at your own pace. The only way ultrasonic at instructed volume could make you feel that is if some incredibly sensitive part of yourself perceived it as being too loud, too aggressive.
I will spend some time looking at what format and volume would be best for you, but I'm a little slammed today.
While we wait, can you give me an overview of your experience with OGSF v1?
It feels like ages ago since I used OGSFv1, and I don’t remember much, except that it was similar to what I’ve experienced with E6 on and off since I increased the volume in ultrasonic. To give a short example, it feels like the part of me that’s been repressed and exiled starts to hate everything about myself. This often manifests in my dreams, where someone goes into a hateful rage and tries to kill me. Then I start hating them back and try to defend myself, usually ending up killing that part of me in the dream. I then wake up feeling absolutely devastated. It's like the part of me that needs to be integrated and healed ends up becoming even more isolated instead. This creates tension in my body and insane pressure in my head, and triggers all kinds of strange physical symptoms. I feels like my psyche is at war, and I believe the physical issues are are the psychosomatic effects of that
When I’ve felt healing, that isolated part in my dreams approaches me, and we’re able to reason with each other, eventually feeling sorry for one another. It’s strange. These moments usually occur long after I’ve quit using the sub, as a sort of blooming effect. This also suggests to me that the pacing was too aggressive while using the sub.
(08-21-2024, 09:55 AM)Shannon Wrote: The ultrasonic being too fast paced - you must be dealing with a very, very early part of yourself if you think that. The script is the same in all formats and the script instructs you to go at your own pace. The only way ultrasonic at instructed volume could make you feel that is if some incredibly sensitive part of yourself perceived it as being too loud, too aggressive.
I am sensitive. I feel things deeply. So that is a very likely conclusion, imo.
As for E6, I actually switched to masked format recently. And things have been manageable again, which is good.
