05-16-2024, 04:49 PM
(05-12-2024, 06:38 AM)Diablojack00 Wrote:(05-11-2024, 11:03 PM)Shannon Wrote: First, I would use 1 loop, and not change any variables until weeks or months past the determination of what happens with the relationship.
Second, I would never allow a date to wait that long before it happens. I have never made a date for more than a couple days in advance. The longer it waits, the longer she has time to think, the longer her fears and doubts have time to grow, etc. I always try to go on a date (or get together with her instead of a date) the same day I ask, or the next day. Making them wait is a bad idea for those reasons, and because it makes it more likely that she will shoot you down.
Third, you want to just disappear for two weeks before the date? That's not a good idea at all in my opinion. That will just make her think you've lost interest, and then her imagination will run wild and it'll blow up in your face.
Fourth, it sounds like in spite of my input to the contrary, that you set up a date. I don't know if you used the word date, but by the sounds of it, even if you didn't, she'll be thinking it's a date by the way you did it - if I am understanding how you did this correctly.
I think you've made some mistakes here. The best way forward at this point, in my opinion, is, change nothing. Go eat there as normal, talk to her as normal, use the same number of loops, and do the best you can with how you have things set up. Now you have to go 2 weeks without somehow screwing up, before you even get to the date. That's not ideal by any means. At this point, you have some good things going, but your setup isn't perfect, and you have to keep things going until the date. Don't make things harder for yourself than you need to! It's already damned difficult for a guy these days.
So again... my advice is, change nothing. 1 loop per day on, keep going to eat there as usual, keep talking to her as usual, etc. - make sure she knows you're still interested during the TWO WEEKS you made her wait for a date... and see how the date goes.
Or maybe see if she'd like to get together before then.
I agree the set up wasn't very good but the movie she said she wanted to see was Garfield and it comes out the 23rd of this month so I asked her to meet me there to see it.
So I didn't use the word date.
Most times I ask a girl to do something within a day or so but this seemed like a good idea at the time.
But yeah, going 2 weeks without screwing something up, well that's on me.
I was thinking of asking if she wants to do something before then.
By the way disappearing for that amount of time was a female friends idea but it sounded crazy. My mentor taught me that to keep from screwing things up, but when it didn't work he just said it doesn't work all the time.
I only ever used that 2 times and it failed so I stopped it.
I'll do one loop and keep talking to her as usual.
I text this new girl that's 20 and said I'm going to go eat at this place, ya wanna go?
I sent her the address and said Leaving now.
She said Lol Right now
I said Yes I'm hungry.
So we met there and had a good time.
I know because she said she had a good time and hopes next time she won't be awkward IF there's a next time. I said there will be.
We've text a lot since then.
X4a 1511 is great.
Now, with the server, I went to eat yesterday and I was told she had been cut from the floor by another server I know.
I said I'd order to go. My server was at the register I stood there till she said Hey. She was distracted or something because she took my order and I sat down across from the register and she didn't come to talk to me or anything.
When I got my food I commented that we were matching because I had a pink shirt on and she had a pink bow in her hair.
When I said we match..she said Really but wasn't paying attention or it seemed that way...
I said yeah you have a pink bow. She said I always wear pink... I didn't say anything at that point but she asked me twice if I needed anything else after she gave my order to me and even gave me a bag for it.
I left her a good tip even though I didn't have to for carry out.
Seemed she was not having the best day. She eats very little at work. She's always telling me she hasn't eaten yet and all that.
So a normal interaction with the server and not much else to report right now.