07-28-2023, 07:44 AM
July 24th
During the last month i experienced fear in various forms. And I am writing about it now. Why? I don't know why. This is weird. I knew what was happening, I was working through it, experiencing it but never associated as something possibly going on because of maverick. As I said it was manifested in different ways and at different levels. I am not going to record all of occasions and ways it manifested as i don't remember all and it will be injustice to record some things here and there that make no sense. However lately, since previous week it has been expressed as social anxiety. Being extremely shy and anxious like i was when i was a little boy and as a teenager. Today at some point when all this became obvious I was like wtf. I immediately made the switch in terms of i'm a big man, done so many things why do I feel like that. And anxiety gone in an instance. Maybe the breakthrough subconsciously happened and then lead to the realization today, that moment.
And while I am on this case; That's what i'm talking about when I say Maverick works on many things on the background and you don't know what and when is going to be handled. Shyness, social anxiety, fear of survival and so many other things which have to do with being a solid character, fearless, have been a struggle for me. This is foundations which were compromised and are liability for me.
July 25th
It seems I was right about yesterday's insight. The social anxiety went away. Not a 100% but 90%. Im a different person. Funny how I didn't realize that earlier. Hopefully Maverick did some magic during this time.
July 28th
This feeling of wanting a break from Maverick started again. Gladly another 2 30-minute listens and then I will follow Duke's recommendation of taking a break.
During the last month i experienced fear in various forms. And I am writing about it now. Why? I don't know why. This is weird. I knew what was happening, I was working through it, experiencing it but never associated as something possibly going on because of maverick. As I said it was manifested in different ways and at different levels. I am not going to record all of occasions and ways it manifested as i don't remember all and it will be injustice to record some things here and there that make no sense. However lately, since previous week it has been expressed as social anxiety. Being extremely shy and anxious like i was when i was a little boy and as a teenager. Today at some point when all this became obvious I was like wtf. I immediately made the switch in terms of i'm a big man, done so many things why do I feel like that. And anxiety gone in an instance. Maybe the breakthrough subconsciously happened and then lead to the realization today, that moment.
And while I am on this case; That's what i'm talking about when I say Maverick works on many things on the background and you don't know what and when is going to be handled. Shyness, social anxiety, fear of survival and so many other things which have to do with being a solid character, fearless, have been a struggle for me. This is foundations which were compromised and are liability for me.
July 25th
It seems I was right about yesterday's insight. The social anxiety went away. Not a 100% but 90%. Im a different person. Funny how I didn't realize that earlier. Hopefully Maverick did some magic during this time.
July 28th
This feeling of wanting a break from Maverick started again. Gladly another 2 30-minute listens and then I will follow Duke's recommendation of taking a break.
