Day 127,
I listened to two very useful 'podcast' type videos today that are paradigm-changing. To me, paradigm-changing encounters and events are rare, and I've had two of them today:
"Tinder Myths Debunked: Online Dating Revisited" by Prof. Sam Vaknin
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RhRS3Ziv8xg
This video has two dozen references about the uses of dating apps, and varying success rates between men and women.
In short:
* Tinder and online dating sites aren't used as hookup sites. More relationships form from the rare encounters which occur on Tinder than do hookups.
* More than half of Tinder's users have not had a single hookup or sexual encounter from using Tinder. A large proportion haven't even met off the site.
* Men have a 0.6% success rate on Tinder. A small portion of swipes lead to matches. A small proportion of matches lead to messages. Smaller even for dates. About a third of dates lead to a hookup, and many hookups lead to relationships
* Both men and women derive entertainment from swiping more than they use it for intentional dating or even hooking up.
* Straight men get more matches from other men than they do women.
* There's a tendency in using dating apps towards narcissism and psychopathy.
* Manosphere types confound narcissist and psychopath types with 'alpha males', when anthropologists have found AM's to be the facilitator, the broker, the 'healer-in-chief'.
* Women tend to seek out men of lower status - the "betas" - for both short-term and long-term relationships.
* You have a higher proportion of success in hooking up by meeting someone at a library or a grocery store. (i.e., go touch grass, losers). Much higher if you go to a bar or a club.
I would attribute about 10 of my relationships to online dating, so I'm in a rare minority who've had some form of success from a tool that's built to fail. Obviously, I expect women to 'succeed' more than men, but they aren't capitalizing on it to hookup or enter relationships.
This reframes a lot of my experiences on dating apps, where I thought that I was repelling women or scaring them away in some sense. So much ghosting and non-responses from women.
Second, is this interview from an entrepreneur/influencer named 'Brute de Force':
Man2Man: Brute De Force & The Art of Going All-In
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TWCVh2h0w-0
The guy is balls-to-the-wall, but he's motivational in his odd sense.
Telling us to throw ourselves into the path we know we must follow.
How asking for advice is secretly hoping to be taken off course.
How even positive habits like the gym can be a disguise and a convenient time-waster from your purpose.
How we live in eternal preparation for an event that could never happen as a result of your own efforts.
Makes me realize just how much unconscious incongruity the average person lives under.
In my Maverick journey, it feels like certain chains have been lifted, but I am not pulled terribly hard in any direction. Much more distracted and distractible, but I know at least the next couple of steps to take, so I will take them.
I listened to two very useful 'podcast' type videos today that are paradigm-changing. To me, paradigm-changing encounters and events are rare, and I've had two of them today:
"Tinder Myths Debunked: Online Dating Revisited" by Prof. Sam Vaknin
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RhRS3Ziv8xg
This video has two dozen references about the uses of dating apps, and varying success rates between men and women.
In short:
* Tinder and online dating sites aren't used as hookup sites. More relationships form from the rare encounters which occur on Tinder than do hookups.
* More than half of Tinder's users have not had a single hookup or sexual encounter from using Tinder. A large proportion haven't even met off the site.
* Men have a 0.6% success rate on Tinder. A small portion of swipes lead to matches. A small proportion of matches lead to messages. Smaller even for dates. About a third of dates lead to a hookup, and many hookups lead to relationships
* Both men and women derive entertainment from swiping more than they use it for intentional dating or even hooking up.
* Straight men get more matches from other men than they do women.
* There's a tendency in using dating apps towards narcissism and psychopathy.
* Manosphere types confound narcissist and psychopath types with 'alpha males', when anthropologists have found AM's to be the facilitator, the broker, the 'healer-in-chief'.
* Women tend to seek out men of lower status - the "betas" - for both short-term and long-term relationships.
* You have a higher proportion of success in hooking up by meeting someone at a library or a grocery store. (i.e., go touch grass, losers). Much higher if you go to a bar or a club.
I would attribute about 10 of my relationships to online dating, so I'm in a rare minority who've had some form of success from a tool that's built to fail. Obviously, I expect women to 'succeed' more than men, but they aren't capitalizing on it to hookup or enter relationships.
This reframes a lot of my experiences on dating apps, where I thought that I was repelling women or scaring them away in some sense. So much ghosting and non-responses from women.
Second, is this interview from an entrepreneur/influencer named 'Brute de Force':
Man2Man: Brute De Force & The Art of Going All-In
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TWCVh2h0w-0
The guy is balls-to-the-wall, but he's motivational in his odd sense.
Telling us to throw ourselves into the path we know we must follow.
How asking for advice is secretly hoping to be taken off course.
How even positive habits like the gym can be a disguise and a convenient time-waster from your purpose.
How we live in eternal preparation for an event that could never happen as a result of your own efforts.
Makes me realize just how much unconscious incongruity the average person lives under.
In my Maverick journey, it feels like certain chains have been lifted, but I am not pulled terribly hard in any direction. Much more distracted and distractible, but I know at least the next couple of steps to take, so I will take them.
UMS v2 Journal (current) || Overcoming Fear 5.75G Journal
