Clearing the Foundation- Aventus's OF v3 Journal

[Aventus45]

Cycle 16/36
Day 3/4 (65 days in)
2 loops hybrid trickling stream 2 days on 2 days off

I suddenly reached a peak of a conflict of my own fear of not being enough and literally feel the conflict between my old states of belief and whatever is challenging it. The old belief is me, as a 23-year-old dude in one of the most diverse and active cities in the world, has nothing of value to provide to a woman my age, who has literally everyone her age to 10-20 years older than her to choose from. How the hell do I measure up compared to someone who throws status and power around? Fear and hopelessness are the result of this belief and something is challenging this belief is causing a huge resistance within me. what I'm thinking is another cycle of OF may help tip the scales. 

hey Aventus, bro I damn feel you.

I totally agree to you, but you are missing something, you don't know what da fuck they were doing when they were at 23, right?
Most of them probably were exactly like us(me too was thinking about this), thinking about their weakness and they were desperate about not being good enugh ?

Most of girls around 18-25 are fucking with much older guys like 30-35. They were doing this because, girls have their most SMV at 20-25 years old. and once they reached 30, their SMV starting to drop significiantly, so they becaming some kind of sexual exercise object for younger guys.

But generally, mens SMV is at the peak at 25-40 years old, because as you say they are now able to throw status and power around, so they can fuck a 20 y.o girl or 25.

Think about it, you are improving constantly using this subs and other kind of self-development stuffs at the age of 23, do you think you will not be better than them(or at least same) when you arrive 30 or 35? There is no way.

I knew about the dynamic for a while now and it has essentially allowed me to plan for the long term on how I want to approach( especially with subs and thats why i thought about it in phases). It wasn't like that in the past. as I just felt hopeless in the end and gave up. Now, my perspective is changing and while I still believe that the dynamic is there, I definitely more hopeful compared to how I was in the past.

I have known guys who reached their peak or reaching their peak and have not resolved their own demons, so while their successful with women, their demons end up blowing up the relationship and breaking everything. I'm plan is to resolve that shit early and start building myself up more.