07-27-2020, 02:22 AM
Round 4 completed.
Been feeling weird the last few days off, this is the first time I have actually felt it might be resistance. Lots of doubts surroundings things, irritated at things, also not happy with myself, a sense of inward direction that wished things be different. I feel the stress of the potential move before it has even happened. Surly it is meant to feel good and exciting. I did get that excited feeling for that first house we applied for and everything seemed great and felt so good looking forward to that potential outcome. This is why it is weird now, as it feels like the complete opposite. Pretty sure this feeling is resistance, as I cannot make sense of it.
When I feel like this and perceive things through this way, even though they feel real, I know I can't trust them 100% as they are all based of feelings, and quite not so good feeling ones at that. Based on passed experience, on one side I have a sense that they might be irrational, then on the other I wonder if I am feeling this way for a good reason, if it is trying to tell me something. My safety is that whatever path I choose, there is no wrong option, as each I can learn by and down the line I always have the opportunity to course correct.
Round 5 starts tonight..
Been feeling weird the last few days off, this is the first time I have actually felt it might be resistance. Lots of doubts surroundings things, irritated at things, also not happy with myself, a sense of inward direction that wished things be different. I feel the stress of the potential move before it has even happened. Surly it is meant to feel good and exciting. I did get that excited feeling for that first house we applied for and everything seemed great and felt so good looking forward to that potential outcome. This is why it is weird now, as it feels like the complete opposite. Pretty sure this feeling is resistance, as I cannot make sense of it.
When I feel like this and perceive things through this way, even though they feel real, I know I can't trust them 100% as they are all based of feelings, and quite not so good feeling ones at that. Based on passed experience, on one side I have a sense that they might be irrational, then on the other I wonder if I am feeling this way for a good reason, if it is trying to tell me something. My safety is that whatever path I choose, there is no wrong option, as each I can learn by and down the line I always have the opportunity to course correct.
Round 5 starts tonight..
