Shannon's Journal Discussion Thread, Vol. 5

[Shannon]

Hi Shannon, a couple of things clicked into place for me with two books I came across about fear and the experiences I've had with your subs.

I've spoken often here about MLS and SE - having recently read 'Finding Flow' by Mihaly Csíkszentmihályi I realise that with both of these subs I spent a lot of time in flow, and they helped me get into these states through different means, and that this is what I keep trying to get back to now (when I speak often about these subs).

With SE I entered flow because I had complete self acceptance and no inner critic bugging ; instead I had an attitude of 'whatever happens I can handle it, and my peace and happiness comes first'; with this attitude I could engage in any task, from creating a financial model  to cleaning the kitchen (for want of a better expression) like an artist, labouring with curiosity and for the sheer pleasure of the work I was doing.

MLS built upon this (I transitioned into MLS straight from SE) by giving me tools to enhance my skill level. Not only did I have no inner critic but I had the added confidence of possessing a power to learn to solve and enjoy engaging in any problem.

The self esteem and high level mental competence from MLS gave me an experience I've not experienced since or before; something like being the character from limitless. I felt that with enough time and focus I could do anything and be in love with what I was doing.

The relevance of this to the current discussion on FRM is I had no fear at that time and I believe absence was intrinsically linked to the freedom and the energy state of being in flow which in turn came from the acceptance that I could handle anything with the power of not being ego damaged by failure or criticism (from SE) and the power being able to overcome and even enjoy any obstacle (through MLS).

Now I come to the main point I happened to open up the book 'feel the fear and do it anyway' on a page which seemed to corroborate my experience of no fear and the trail which lead to that state (through the path of Self Esteem and MLS)

The book distinguishes Level 1, 2 and 3 fears; level 1 fears being fears of things which just happen or which you need to take action on such as being attacked (just happens) and losing weight (something you need to take action on). Level 2 fears however are those which challenge your identity/ego such as success, being rejected etc (I  personally place these fears in the realm of the death fear which we have spoken of).  Level 3 is really interesting - the 'I can't handle it' fear; and every fear can be traced to this fear - i.e. i can't handle being rejected, I can't handle being attacked.

What I believe is that if I feel I can handle anything as I very much did on the subs I mentioned, I would have no need for fear (and I didn't). I am able to give up control over what I can't control and enjoy focussing on what I can control, even be absorbed in it (the fearless flow state).

In summary fear in my experience was entirely dissolved by trust, and trust came from a huge sense of personal power and personal power came from competence, discipline and the ability to manage my emotional state.

I hope that's helpful.

My experiences with exploring what fear is and my conclusions on how it works differ significantly from that book states.  While I can see how you managed to get past your fears, that route will not work for everyone.  Different personalities have different natural proclivities and abilities, and differing points of view and points of sensitivity, as well as different reactions to fear, etc.  The approach to killing fear is not just one method.  It has to be polymorphic self optimizing.  And given its complexity, that makes it sort of squared or cubed in complexity to solve.  I will ponder what you have said further and see if there is not some sort of clue here.  Thank you.