My ASC Journal - Conquering anxiety & feeling extremely confident

[GreekGod22]

Day 38

Still going. Not seeing big breakthroughs with ASC , although I haven't been much outside lately.
I am in a better place (mentally and emotionally), compared to how I was before ASC.
Seriously considering EPRHA3 as my next sub. I just looked at the program goals and identified a lot of them would be great for me. I selected them below.
I do have some hesitation to commit to it due to reading other EPRHA/E1-2-3 journals and not finding them very encouraging. It seems like it can be a stalling sub.
I want to run AM6/7 at some point. Yet I am not at the required level of mental, emotional balance. I reckon I do have some emotional damage/scars/insecurities that are holding me back a lot.

• I have mild social / generalized anxiety. I am high-functioning to a degree, but not thriving and not fully comfortable in social situations
  
• I have approach anxiety with women due to feeling unworthy / not good enough. Doing cold approach has not solved it.
  
• I have a low self image of myself
  
• I have a deep need for the validation / love / approval of others
  
• I don't consciously suffer from the past, I have no big traumas. But I have been physically beaten, my mother was an alcoholic throught my childhood.
  
• I used to be very shy, reserved, cautious, fearful guy. Still am to some degree. I have evolved a lot in this respect.
  

EPRHA3 Goals that would benefit me:

The goals of this program are:
[*]Guilt/shame/fear release
[*]Mental/emotional maturity improvement
[*]Self forgiveness
[*]Self Validation
[*]Self compassion and self consideration in all the ways that maximize your self-healing, self regeneration and emotional pain relief.
[*]Appreciate yourself in all the right ways to allow for maximum success in self regeneration and healing.Let go of and stop needing/seeking the approval of and permission of others for your self-healing and regenerating.
[*]Give yourself approval and permission to live the life that allows you to heal and regenerate, stay healed and regenerated, and allows you to be genuinely happy, and to genuinely heal and regenerate.
[*]Overcome The Victim Mentality (full script). - big one. Victim and self pity
[*]End and prevent self pity and any desire to engage in it.
[*]End and prevent self sabotage in self healing and regeneration.
[*]Positive Thinking, Positive Attitude (full program script).
[*]Allow for happiness, self healing and regenerating through genuine gratitude and appreciation.
[*]Make yourself worthy of your own self love, and allow you to be loving towards yourself.
[*]Like yourself, and if necessary, make yourself deserving of self liking and self love, and adjust yourself to be someone you can like and love.