08-21-2019, 02:28 PM
Something is clicking. I've been running Phantom of the Opera on a YT playlist, I'm running LTU ultrasonic loops, and I watched Shannon's video on visualization maybe an hour ago. I've been thinking about how I've been seeing myself and my life presently. Things have been changing.
These last 2 weeks I've had a different motivation while working alone in my department. I noticed, just by my choice of actions doing my job, that I really love and enjoy artistic dance, as I'm looking for and creating work-specific moves up while going. Even when I'm cleaning up and throwing objects in large bins at the end of my shift, I'm taking pride in my continual accuracy, for the thrill is found in the subtle perfection I attain in those little actions. And all the while, a song in my head will be chosen which fits perfectly, and my actions often try to sync with beats---and that's cool!
. I see it as art, and I'm loving it.
I'm taking pride in it. I'm not even making room for old beliefs much, as all are fear-based and just suffocating of expression and creativity. Maybe that's why I do it, for much of my mental dance performances are me expressing myself. I enjoy it. It hits home. Real emotion comes with it, be it sadness, anger, hope, or whatever. I let it out, and I've even done re-runs in my mind if I find I've gotten (emotionally) stuck in a spot. I'll go back, and even introduce a new relevant song matching my present thinking and emotions. I'm using music and creative dance to heal me.
Why Phantom of the Opera? The Phantom continually sings with some anguish and unmet desire which I relate to, yet he's trying, again and again and again. Like he's seeking some solution and redemption through his music. Which I really relate to. He's seeking love........but it's his insistence on a single person to fill his void is why he's deserted once again. Christine showed her desire for him, but his violent obsession had her retreat from him. His self-created mental prison is why she ran away, for that was not her reality. It's a sad truth, but he had choices, if he'd checked reality as it was, not as he wanted.
LTU is doing that for me. As it's been bringing my blinders off, it's allowing more choice in my life. It's a great feeling.
These last 2 weeks I've had a different motivation while working alone in my department. I noticed, just by my choice of actions doing my job, that I really love and enjoy artistic dance, as I'm looking for and creating work-specific moves up while going. Even when I'm cleaning up and throwing objects in large bins at the end of my shift, I'm taking pride in my continual accuracy, for the thrill is found in the subtle perfection I attain in those little actions. And all the while, a song in my head will be chosen which fits perfectly, and my actions often try to sync with beats---and that's cool!
. I see it as art, and I'm loving it. I'm taking pride in it. I'm not even making room for old beliefs much, as all are fear-based and just suffocating of expression and creativity. Maybe that's why I do it, for much of my mental dance performances are me expressing myself. I enjoy it. It hits home. Real emotion comes with it, be it sadness, anger, hope, or whatever. I let it out, and I've even done re-runs in my mind if I find I've gotten (emotionally) stuck in a spot. I'll go back, and even introduce a new relevant song matching my present thinking and emotions. I'm using music and creative dance to heal me.
Why Phantom of the Opera? The Phantom continually sings with some anguish and unmet desire which I relate to, yet he's trying, again and again and again. Like he's seeking some solution and redemption through his music. Which I really relate to. He's seeking love........but it's his insistence on a single person to fill his void is why he's deserted once again. Christine showed her desire for him, but his violent obsession had her retreat from him. His self-created mental prison is why she ran away, for that was not her reality. It's a sad truth, but he had choices, if he'd checked reality as it was, not as he wanted.
LTU is doing that for me. As it's been bringing my blinders off, it's allowing more choice in my life. It's a great feeling.
I want to be FREE!
