Stage 1, Day 27 (Monday):
It was national holiday where I live. We went at the beach. About an hour after we did arrive, I have been offered by a very outgoing hippy woman to take few puffs on her weed join (now legalized). As pretty much everyone, I went to college and did experiment a little bit with weed but, tbh, it has been a very long time since last time that I have taken some of it.
This made me enter some sort of altered mind state. First, I became more relaxed. I felt my senses amplified. (Or maybe it was just my awareness that changed) Anyhow, I felt myself more anchored into the present moment. I was hearing more the waves, feeling more the sun and the wind on my skin.
And also, (and very interesting too), I have started to have this type of conspiracy belief (but a good one). It is that all women around were horny promiscuous sexual freaks and they were all looking at me with lust and doing everything to attract my attention.
I got a lot smiles from women. There is one that kept going back and forth between her towel and the water and was always pausing in front of me and was bending over in front of me to clean her feet of sand (or you know, any other pretext to show off to me). That one did really arouse me. I was forced to control myself to not get erect which is kinda embarrassing on a naturist beach...
Honestly, having this powerful sexual feeling just by looking at a woman, it has been a while that such a thing did happen to me!
She kept walking past me back and forth... That girl and her gf ended up moving their things just beside us...
Was it reality or fabulation in my head due to the weed? I don't know even if I think that some of it is real for sure. One thing that was real for sure, it was the belief that I had about the sexual conspiracy that all women had on me and how that belief did change my behavior, my body language, my confidence and the way I was interacting with them and how, in exchange, they were reacting back to me.
In a way, it has been very educational day. I feel that I am on something...
It was national holiday where I live. We went at the beach. About an hour after we did arrive, I have been offered by a very outgoing hippy woman to take few puffs on her weed join (now legalized). As pretty much everyone, I went to college and did experiment a little bit with weed but, tbh, it has been a very long time since last time that I have taken some of it.
This made me enter some sort of altered mind state. First, I became more relaxed. I felt my senses amplified. (Or maybe it was just my awareness that changed) Anyhow, I felt myself more anchored into the present moment. I was hearing more the waves, feeling more the sun and the wind on my skin.
And also, (and very interesting too), I have started to have this type of conspiracy belief (but a good one). It is that all women around were horny promiscuous sexual freaks and they were all looking at me with lust and doing everything to attract my attention.
I got a lot smiles from women. There is one that kept going back and forth between her towel and the water and was always pausing in front of me and was bending over in front of me to clean her feet of sand (or you know, any other pretext to show off to me). That one did really arouse me. I was forced to control myself to not get erect which is kinda embarrassing on a naturist beach...
Honestly, having this powerful sexual feeling just by looking at a woman, it has been a while that such a thing did happen to me!
She kept walking past me back and forth... That girl and her gf ended up moving their things just beside us...
Was it reality or fabulation in my head due to the weed? I don't know even if I think that some of it is real for sure. One thing that was real for sure, it was the belief that I had about the sexual conspiracy that all women had on me and how that belief did change my behavior, my body language, my confidence and the way I was interacting with them and how, in exchange, they were reacting back to me.
In a way, it has been very educational day. I feel that I am on something...
