@Benjamin You're right, another lesson to learn there is following my intuition.
Day 53: These days I've felt, with low intensity (so easy to let go of), fears of aggression by other people. It's like the remaining of the other day, what was moved inside of me. I remember this has happened to me several times in relation to teenage guys. This time I could connect the dots until the times when I was bullied at school... interesting. I remember, back then, I wanted to learn some martial art to let go of those situations. And it's perfectly fine that I didn't, as nowadays I know that the real cause of those problems is the fear itself (sticking to it implies sticking to the problems).
Another thing that has been coming up to me frequently lately, and with big intensity, is that I'm handling really badly not having what I want. I get mad, pissed off, really emo, lol
It's something that I'll have to continue cleaning on, as it drains my energy and gets me bad moods. These "wantings" I mean are not heart desires... but silly desires with attachment on the result, that come from the ego.
By the way, I also had new really good things happening to me. For example:
On Saturday night, I approached a group of women that I liked. It was a long time since last time I do that. They were really enjoyable. Nevertheless, in a minute or so, I didn't knew what to say or do... so I said good bye and went away. Overall it was very nice. I realized I'm free from a lot of crap that came with PUA mindset... also from the (few) crap available in other more advanced mindsets, such as Cory Skyy's and Brent Smith's (it's really curious for me to see that they still limit themselves with crap, without seeing it... maybe that's deeply rooted in their egos). The freedom from that crap that tends to happen to others, but not to me, comes from me being genuinely me, and following my intuition and heart.
Later, I realized what caused that to be like that, with that group of cute women. I had the intention of finding a group of really interesting, friendly and approachable women. That's why I found the group in the next club we went to, and why I felt like I would approach them, way before doing it. But when approaching, my sole intention was to talk to them... nothing else, in fact. That caused me to not know what to do in a short time. The solution to that, was simply having the intention put to get to know them, as I actually wanted to but was not clear about. That would have made me flow from there. I learned...
Day 53: These days I've felt, with low intensity (so easy to let go of), fears of aggression by other people. It's like the remaining of the other day, what was moved inside of me. I remember this has happened to me several times in relation to teenage guys. This time I could connect the dots until the times when I was bullied at school... interesting. I remember, back then, I wanted to learn some martial art to let go of those situations. And it's perfectly fine that I didn't, as nowadays I know that the real cause of those problems is the fear itself (sticking to it implies sticking to the problems).
Another thing that has been coming up to me frequently lately, and with big intensity, is that I'm handling really badly not having what I want. I get mad, pissed off, really emo, lol
It's something that I'll have to continue cleaning on, as it drains my energy and gets me bad moods. These "wantings" I mean are not heart desires... but silly desires with attachment on the result, that come from the ego.By the way, I also had new really good things happening to me. For example:
On Saturday night, I approached a group of women that I liked. It was a long time since last time I do that. They were really enjoyable. Nevertheless, in a minute or so, I didn't knew what to say or do... so I said good bye and went away. Overall it was very nice. I realized I'm free from a lot of crap that came with PUA mindset... also from the (few) crap available in other more advanced mindsets, such as Cory Skyy's and Brent Smith's (it's really curious for me to see that they still limit themselves with crap, without seeing it... maybe that's deeply rooted in their egos). The freedom from that crap that tends to happen to others, but not to me, comes from me being genuinely me, and following my intuition and heart.
Later, I realized what caused that to be like that, with that group of cute women. I had the intention of finding a group of really interesting, friendly and approachable women. That's why I found the group in the next club we went to, and why I felt like I would approach them, way before doing it. But when approaching, my sole intention was to talk to them... nothing else, in fact. That caused me to not know what to do in a short time. The solution to that, was simply having the intention put to get to know them, as I actually wanted to but was not clear about. That would have made me flow from there. I learned...
UMS
