05-28-2019, 09:30 AM
Day 93
Two days ago the existential grief was at, say, a 15% intensity, where it didn't choke me up and I could handle being with it though it really hurt. I sat with it for the entire two hour session with my healer.
Yesterday the grief was at about a 10% level, and I was with my cuddler. Her healing training is looking on the voices in the head as "victimizers" and almost yelling back at them. She recommended treating it as a victimizer and as a lie, though it felt weird because the passage of time is a real thing, so I'm not sure how to treat it as a lie. Then yesterday I went to my acupuncturist, who did some needling to me that helped significantly.
It's still beneath everything, I can feel it. I'm not sure what's next. The acupuncturist talked about doing animal medicines, which I'm both open to and unsure about, as I tend to have very bad reactions to drugs. Perhaps I can do a smaller dose to see how my body responds.
Two days ago the existential grief was at, say, a 15% intensity, where it didn't choke me up and I could handle being with it though it really hurt. I sat with it for the entire two hour session with my healer.
Yesterday the grief was at about a 10% level, and I was with my cuddler. Her healing training is looking on the voices in the head as "victimizers" and almost yelling back at them. She recommended treating it as a victimizer and as a lie, though it felt weird because the passage of time is a real thing, so I'm not sure how to treat it as a lie. Then yesterday I went to my acupuncturist, who did some needling to me that helped significantly.
It's still beneath everything, I can feel it. I'm not sure what's next. The acupuncturist talked about doing animal medicines, which I'm both open to and unsure about, as I tend to have very bad reactions to drugs. Perhaps I can do a smaller dose to see how my body responds.
I share the details of my life in my posts to help in the understanding of the effects of the subliminals I use. I am only open to advice that relates to the use of the subliminals.
