Findingme's LTU5 Journal

[Shannon]

I picked up LTU v.5 today.  I went ahead with it although I'd been on some other effective subliminals, but mixing UD, E3, SE, and OTVM in one sub is why I'm back.  I expect this sub to change and challenge my thinking, remove some lifelong standards, and..........relax me too.
I'll admit I'm a little nervous (I'm on my 2nd loop now), but.....I've felt like this before and had major changes as I kept going.  

What do I seek to change?

1.  The victim mentality.  This morning, hours before starting LTU, I thought of what I was expecting in my interactions.  I realized that unconsciously I shifted to a non-verbal mentality of "someone else feed me", a mix of feeling sorry for myself and manipulating others to respond.  I also realized......it tears down any self esteem I hold on to.  F*** that.  Even my anger at this seems pointed to manipulating others to "do for me what I should do for myself".  Again, OTVM is a major reason for picking this up.

2.  Letting go of my past.  I'm unsure how this will happen, it's closely linked with the former paragraph.  They're tied together, in fact.

3.  Being honest with myself first, then others.  I ran UD almost 2 years back, and it powerfully worked at my self-dishonesty which I was clearly unaware of beforehand.  I became much, much more honest with myself, and I was not so guarded with my words.  I became unafraid to simply say something I was thinking, and I saw life much more beautifully than I ever had.  UD changed my life.  

4.  Being happy and joyful, despite life's happenings.  The only downfall of using UD--for me--was that I was sad and crying a lot.  I was grieving a lot of life lost, and it dwindled, but even Shannon replied in my UD journal about needing some happiness and joy.  LTU is a smart mix of subs  .

5.  Lastly, I'm seeking something that existed in the old LTU, and it's actually why I bought it a year back: self reliance.  I've been using another alpha subliminal since mid December, and I became aware very quickly how dependent I was to others around me.  The old LTU had self reliance in its scripting, I remember Shannon saying in his personal journal he was going to include the old LTU in LTU 5.5G, but in the recent sales pages, I've not seen it mentioned. @Shannon, is self reliance scripted in this new version?  

I have hope in this.  With the new FRM, the whole Magnus engine, and Shannon editing needed changes (going from v.4 to v.5 already), I'm grateful I'm here.  Thank you for all the hard work you've put in Shannon.

The script from the previous-to-5.5G version of LTU is in this program in its entirety, upgraded to current standards.  It's in there.