(05-18-2017, 07:51 AM)CatMan Wrote: Hello Greenduck!
I would say, years ago, before subs, I used to be that way in an extreme fashion when in the presence of females I was attracted to. I'd often freeze or not be able to communicate properly, things like that. Keep in mind, this is a VERY long time ago, far before ever coming here. For awhile now, like 5 years or so maybe more, I'm far more present when with girls I am attracted to. Even if results haven't caught up with that yet. I still feel some anxiety at times in the same situation, which may always happen as I find the girl attractive so I feel naturally there may be some sense of "something on the line" when in the situation. So, in short, I do still get anxiety and "get in my own head", but nowhere near as bad. Maybe that's a sign more work needs to be done there, or that it's as good as it will get and there will always be a bit left of that when around attractive people. Maybe this is complicated due to the level of drought with females I've had, creating a craving or need or fear of not getting something, scarcity. To be honest, I don't know.
Thank you for stating that about me. Without arrogance, I'd agree. I'd also agree that for possibly a variety of reasons, I get in my own way. Be that fear, shame, old things haunting me still, who knows. But I know that things exist in me still, that are impeding progress. I hope in time they can be resolved.
I am in the best shape I've been in for years. I started intermittent fasting to lose a ton of weight I didn't realise I had. Apparently, I'm predisposed to generating lots of visceral fat, which is a blessing and a curse. Blessing, because I looked a lot better in clothes than I should have given my height and weight. Curse, because I had no idea just HOW far out of control my weight was other than when I did a random scale test one day. Then, that morning, horrified by the number and sickened with myself I let it get so bad, I took immediate action. 10 months later, 67 pounds lost, and I'm told, many years taken off me, and I'd have to agree!
I am cautious about anything that could be considered "mind programming", to stay within Shannon's guidelines of one method at a time. I understand the logic behind it, but for now I'd like to be more cautious.
Thank you for posting, Greenduck. I hope E2 is serving you well! I liked it, and I've had my brother on it for over 7 months now, and will do so until E3.
Great to hear that you have made that progress, in the end, the only important thing is that things become better and that you feel better! And from how to speak about it you have pretty good knowledge about yourself and how you work, which I frankly find impressive.
One thought regarding the attractive people: when I'm with someone attractive, I think that "who cares if they are attractive?" "they are just as human as I am, they also need love, a good friend, someone to laugh with" and they often want someone to look beyond their own appearance and see them for who they are (as most people get bugged down into how they look) and not just how they look.
Looks are shallow and the games around it can be fun to play, but are in the end meaningless and empty. You should be able to tell yourself to "stfu" (if you know what I mean) when these thoughts about looks, etc. show up and get back to what matters. This have become much easier for me after working with easing up tension in my body, in my neck, shoulders, chest, etc. Instead of tensing up, I relax and get back to enjoying whatever I'm doing. When we stop overthinking stuff and tensing up about how things are "supposed" to be, we have a much easier time just finding what to do and say next as it is a natural process. We are social animals by nature. We are experts at finding what work and not work, copying things from others, being creative, funny and happy. But tension comes in the way of that, and that is why yoga is awesome
Oh yeah one more thing - You should have people around you that see how awesome your are, not people that always find defects in you. People that see uniqueness in you. When you find them, hold on to them, they are worth their weight in gold! Someone that help you see yourself in a positive light (because that is so hard to do sometimes and we get bugged down into negativity).
GL mister!!
