01-06-2017, 07:25 AM
I'm not gonna lie. My desire for women has dropped, immensely. I found myself wanting to send a text message to a couple different women on a couple different occasions, but each time I reached for my phone, I said to myself "why bother?"
Is this a clever form of resistance? The reason I would conclude such is that despite being programmed with script to embody maximum sexual irresistibility, I'm losing interest in womankind. The way I feel right now is polar opposite to the reason I started dimsee.
OR
Is this me executing the script, embodying what women find attractive? Non neediness, IDGAF about women, wanting to do my own thing and be alone, instead of getting back on dating sites, getting back on social media...
It's kind of a weird position to be in, where I'm actually in neutral, but my mind senses something is wrong with being in neutral, so there's a discrepancy between mind and heart.
I suppose this is the nature of "becoming", in that I'm not where I was, but I'm not yet to where I'm going.
Anyhow, I am listening to my loops right now, 24 hrs after my previous loops. But from here on out, I will switch back to 36 hrs whenever possible, IF possible. And if not possible, I'll just do 48 hours instead of 36.
**
BTW, L messaged me yesterday, saying my mom contacted her asking for dating advice, and they're gonna be meeting for dinner soon. Lol. 1.8 loops of version A on Saturday was still affecting my mom on Thursday. The bloom ain't no joke, Shannon. The bloom is real.
FWIW, my dad was exposed to version A through the walls for 3-4 nights in a row. but he didn't show any signs of healing whatsoever. So the exposure through the wall theory might have to be discarded. But what I do intend on doing is getting him a copy of the free eprha program and appropriating my speakers into his room, and getting an mp3 player and looping it for all eternity bwahahahah. My dear father need lots of healing, and he's too stubborn to acknowledge it, so I will have to force it upon him. lol.
Is this a clever form of resistance? The reason I would conclude such is that despite being programmed with script to embody maximum sexual irresistibility, I'm losing interest in womankind. The way I feel right now is polar opposite to the reason I started dimsee.
OR
Is this me executing the script, embodying what women find attractive? Non neediness, IDGAF about women, wanting to do my own thing and be alone, instead of getting back on dating sites, getting back on social media...
It's kind of a weird position to be in, where I'm actually in neutral, but my mind senses something is wrong with being in neutral, so there's a discrepancy between mind and heart.
I suppose this is the nature of "becoming", in that I'm not where I was, but I'm not yet to where I'm going.
Anyhow, I am listening to my loops right now, 24 hrs after my previous loops. But from here on out, I will switch back to 36 hrs whenever possible, IF possible. And if not possible, I'll just do 48 hours instead of 36.
**
BTW, L messaged me yesterday, saying my mom contacted her asking for dating advice, and they're gonna be meeting for dinner soon. Lol. 1.8 loops of version A on Saturday was still affecting my mom on Thursday. The bloom ain't no joke, Shannon. The bloom is real.
FWIW, my dad was exposed to version A through the walls for 3-4 nights in a row. but he didn't show any signs of healing whatsoever. So the exposure through the wall theory might have to be discarded. But what I do intend on doing is getting him a copy of the free eprha program and appropriating my speakers into his room, and getting an mp3 player and looping it for all eternity bwahahahah. My dear father need lots of healing, and he's too stubborn to acknowledge it, so I will have to force it upon him. lol.
