(12-27-2016, 07:44 PM)SargeMaximus Wrote: I hope to get to your level one day chaos.
I told you, man. The secret is literally being completely comfortable with who you are and having no fears or hold ups about that. A lot of people's self-improvement / self-development is basically: "How do I stop being less like myself and more socially acceptable?"
My self-development? "How do I start being who I am while operating enough within society's limited boundaries to be successful?" Because, whether I want to admit it or not, I gotta "abide by the rules" in some form or fashion, or I'll be completely rejected... which is the opposite of success.
That being said, there's something attractive about a man that can break societal rules without being TOO far over the edge. It's all about boundaries and frame setting.
When people ask me about boundary setting, I always say it comes down to how much you value yourself. At the end of the day, every interaction is about the exchange of value. A boundary -- to me -- is how much value you're willing to give away (or be taken away) before you tell that person to f*ck off. When a person is demanding too much of your time and not giving anything back -- f*ck off. If a person is trying to devalue your inherent worth (through teasing, being an AMOG, or an SJW shaming you) -- f*ck off. Someone trying to diss your skills or abilities in an attempt to make themselves appear more valuable -- f*ck off.
If the transaction between you and I isn't equitable, I have, I will, and will always... tell you to f*ck right off. Don't second guess yourself when you do these things. Even if there's a "better way" to handle it. Do what's best for YOU. Some people call this rational self-interest -- that you only take an action, that an action is only rational if it promotes your own interests.
Society will tell you NOT to behave in this manner while simultaneously doing the same thing.
In my world, it's realz over feelz. And the fact of the matter is: Society promotes a zero-sum game. For you to win, that means you're taking from someone else. If you understand and accept that fact, you can try to balance the scales so that both parties succeeds (this is the route I always try to take with friends and partners). If you WON'T acknowledge it, however, you'll end up being taken for everything you have, wonder why you feel so terrible, and be on the verge of self-destruction when someone calls you "selfish" when you ask for one tiny little thing.
Me? People call me selfish all the time. I just shrug it off.
