i had a really short but intense rage last night, because my phone service wasn't connecting calls to this girl, and i was trying for 10 minutes straight. my blood was boiling and i was getting ready to throw my phone across the room. My rage has been almost entirely under control (if not smothered by something else) for the last 7 years, so I can only think this was due to resisting the sub. I would NEVER be so mad at something so PETTY!!!!! today, i'm feeling depressive. various things are making me sad that shouldn't, and usually don't. like for instance, my male cousin is a hardcore SJW, and typically i just see beyond this aura of nonsense, or rather what i personally consider to be nonsense. but now it's actually making me sad that he is the way he is. almost like i'm mourning for him. and what is confusing is that i really love him, and he's my favorite cousin, and i usually see past this stuff. is it possible i'm actually seeing in him what i don't like about myself? and if so, am i seeing this part of me dying, as if i'm mourning the loss of whatever SJW beliefs or emotions i may have within me?
this is the only connection i can make in my mind. the shield is covering it all up.
but this post serves to note that i experienced rage, followed by depressive.
this is the only connection i can make in my mind. the shield is covering it all up.
but this post serves to note that i experienced rage, followed by depressive.
