Pride has been holding me back in life. I've been too proud to admit to my own insecurities. I've been using pride to compensate for and mask my insecurity. I've been too proud to make myself vulnerable. I've been too proud to face rejection. I've been too proud to listen. I've been too proud to follow.
I think this is where the majority of my resistance comes from. I've been too proud to be told what to do and too proud to admit to my flaws. I'm only now starting to understand how low my sense of self-worth has been my whole life.
I hypothesise that my greatest resistance to AM6 so far has been a resistance towards the ego balancer which I understand is telling me to humbly release my false pride and consider myself honestly as I actually am. Last night I felt the tension of pride in myself and decided to let it go to a torrent of relief as it released.
Update:
This almost deserves its own post. I just discovered relationship-contingent self-esteem. This describes me and the past 3 girls I've formed some kind of relationship with. This explains why it has been so crushing for me to lose a girl I've had feelings for. To think all this time this whole journey has been about my low self-esteem...
I think this is where the majority of my resistance comes from. I've been too proud to be told what to do and too proud to admit to my flaws. I'm only now starting to understand how low my sense of self-worth has been my whole life.
I hypothesise that my greatest resistance to AM6 so far has been a resistance towards the ego balancer which I understand is telling me to humbly release my false pride and consider myself honestly as I actually am. Last night I felt the tension of pride in myself and decided to let it go to a torrent of relief as it released.
Update:
This almost deserves its own post. I just discovered relationship-contingent self-esteem. This describes me and the past 3 girls I've formed some kind of relationship with. This explains why it has been so crushing for me to lose a girl I've had feelings for. To think all this time this whole journey has been about my low self-esteem...
