09-15-2016, 10:21 AM
(09-15-2016, 09:59 AM)chaosvrgn Wrote: Easiest way to protect the downside of flakes is by minimizing the amount of resources (which includes your TIME) you invest in her before dates / sex. That's my strategy, and it works well. That includes minimal pre-dating texting and phone conversations. Avoiding dinner dates or anything that costs more than a few dollars. When I was San Diego, I used to invite women out to this tea bar -- all the cups of tea cost less than $3. Then, I realized that if I got there 20 minutes late, they'd get tired of waiting and get their own damn tea.
After you've banged them or entered a relationship with them of your choice, then you can slowly ramp up how much you're willing to pay -- generally, I base that on whether they're being a good companion or not. If they start acting distant or treating me like a beta? Withdraw affection and cash. Being pleasant, providing me with intelligent conversation? More affection and cash. Withdraw sex or start denying? I go completely cold, freeze 'em out.
Thank you for your post! I've found this to be important in terms of not over committing time, emotions, thought, etc. How much time have men we know wasted daydreaming about how that first date is going to go and then she doesn't show? Or fantasizing about what a great partner she might be after that good long talk with her about values and future plans, only to have her message you telling you she's changed her mind? I'm guessing that if these things haven't happened to us, they've happened to men we know.
I guess reading this incident with #3 has just gotten me annoyed because things like this seem so common. We think everything is fine, we feel comfortable, only to walk towards it and find out it was an illusion.
