08-20-2016, 05:02 AM
I think I'm hitting the brink of absolving one of my fears.
while there is a part of me that thinks i need to be working nonstop & continuously in order to match the ideal "successful person" archetype, I find that I really don't vibe with it, nor should I beat myself up for not matching that archetype. *see later for possible time as a smear experience* I seem to get my liveliness through interacting with people, not from mundane tasks like spreadsheets, paperwork, etc.. *vomits at the thought of that shit* There's nothing to gain by forcing myself to fit into a mold I just don't fit into. Doing so effectively just stuffs my heart deep into a box it doesn't belong in. So the fear of not being "just like the successful people" is starting to absolve. I already established earlier in this run that the way I see success for myself does not look the same as what I entered into the program thinking success looked like.
I also remember fretting about the way I perceived money at the beginning of the run, during the first couple weeks of stage 1. As of now, the way I perceive money isn't any different, but I am way more conscious and aware of how to use it. So the fundamental part of my personality is still the same, but the various things that relate to it have changed.
Additionally, I think my fear of failure is also being worked on. I welcome failure, and as I have just experienced it freshly, I find that I'm growing tremendously from the failure and that it is just helping to shape me and refine my path to personal greatness.
**I put the phrase in bold around asterisks because I had typed up the first sentence and then a director came by to narrate his script to my uncle who's a producer, and the jist of the story revolves around success. I'm now finishing this post after the director left.
Theme of the film: "Success isn't measured by the destination, it is measured by the journey." & "Work that you love will not cause you pain." & "Success isn't measured by success. It's measured by the ability to rebound from failure".
I find it kind of ironic that something is on my mind and I make a decision to write this post, and then in the middle of writing it, I am interrupted to go hear a story about the journey of success. lol.
while there is a part of me that thinks i need to be working nonstop & continuously in order to match the ideal "successful person" archetype, I find that I really don't vibe with it, nor should I beat myself up for not matching that archetype. *see later for possible time as a smear experience* I seem to get my liveliness through interacting with people, not from mundane tasks like spreadsheets, paperwork, etc.. *vomits at the thought of that shit* There's nothing to gain by forcing myself to fit into a mold I just don't fit into. Doing so effectively just stuffs my heart deep into a box it doesn't belong in. So the fear of not being "just like the successful people" is starting to absolve. I already established earlier in this run that the way I see success for myself does not look the same as what I entered into the program thinking success looked like.
I also remember fretting about the way I perceived money at the beginning of the run, during the first couple weeks of stage 1. As of now, the way I perceive money isn't any different, but I am way more conscious and aware of how to use it. So the fundamental part of my personality is still the same, but the various things that relate to it have changed.
Additionally, I think my fear of failure is also being worked on. I welcome failure, and as I have just experienced it freshly, I find that I'm growing tremendously from the failure and that it is just helping to shape me and refine my path to personal greatness.
**I put the phrase in bold around asterisks because I had typed up the first sentence and then a director came by to narrate his script to my uncle who's a producer, and the jist of the story revolves around success. I'm now finishing this post after the director left.
Theme of the film: "Success isn't measured by the destination, it is measured by the journey." & "Work that you love will not cause you pain." & "Success isn't measured by success. It's measured by the ability to rebound from failure".
I find it kind of ironic that something is on my mind and I make a decision to write this post, and then in the middle of writing it, I am interrupted to go hear a story about the journey of success. lol.
