07-28-2016, 05:56 AM
I went back to read my AOSI journal. First, it took some time for the aura to fire up. I didn't get hot flashes until after day 3. Second, I was always tired and hungry. Third, it made me very irritable. Fourth, it sparked fear without much in the way of dealing with it as effectively as I now do on 2.2. Last, the aura was so overbearing, that it constantly got me into trouble with my wife. There were some out-there IOIs, but no approaches. I've had IOIs on 2.2 that are much better. Still no approaches, but 2.2 is much smoother and effective in so many ways. AOSI needed to be altered, period. Then there were people experiencing nothing but the negative side-effects. How quickly some forget.
That all leads perfectly into this observation: Last night, my wife worked, so I ran 6 loops of US track @ -30 dB (sorry, I totally flip-flopped from original intention to run 4 loops of TS). I had at least 3 massive, sexually-oriented dreams. 2 included women I know in very direct, sexual ways. I'm definitely curious to see them IRL and see if it all connects. I also had constant wood for the last two loops. Every time I tossed or turned, it was like wagon-wheels hittin' a log in the road!
I woke up feeling good, then wife came home, and instantly started little digs at me (or as Ben would say, "have a go" at me). It's our 4th wedding anniversary today (I just want to have a pleasant day), and these digs irritated me easily, and soon I became angry. I still feel irritable. She sat on the couch with her legs splayed wide open before going to bed, but I didn't care as I was pissed. She knew she pissed me off and backed off. I see a connection to old AOSI where I was irritable and my wife shit-tested me constantly. Could it be it's an over-bearing aura? Perhaps bigger & stronger isn't better.
That all leads perfectly into this observation: Last night, my wife worked, so I ran 6 loops of US track @ -30 dB (sorry, I totally flip-flopped from original intention to run 4 loops of TS). I had at least 3 massive, sexually-oriented dreams. 2 included women I know in very direct, sexual ways. I'm definitely curious to see them IRL and see if it all connects. I also had constant wood for the last two loops. Every time I tossed or turned, it was like wagon-wheels hittin' a log in the road!
I woke up feeling good, then wife came home, and instantly started little digs at me (or as Ben would say, "have a go" at me). It's our 4th wedding anniversary today (I just want to have a pleasant day), and these digs irritated me easily, and soon I became angry. I still feel irritable. She sat on the couch with her legs splayed wide open before going to bed, but I didn't care as I was pissed. She knew she pissed me off and backed off. I see a connection to old AOSI where I was irritable and my wife shit-tested me constantly. Could it be it's an over-bearing aura? Perhaps bigger & stronger isn't better.
