04-10-2016, 06:55 AM
day 21
there is no anger left, even as I replay the situation in my mind, my emotions and reactions were guilty and shameful because I need to accept my limitations and grow from there.
I noticed a lot of anxiety and fear this morning as well. I was sad about how I've lost most of my friends due to my own actions. I was filled with fear but not sure exactly what about.
Ultrasonics played all night. Don't recall the dreams.
Ok. As I write this, a feeling of calm has taken over, I feel good. Peaceful.
I am constantly thinking of what needs to be done or what I could be doing.
I also see why people procrastinate while listening to the sub. It's because all the sludge and sewage of negative emotion is surfacing. I guess what is happening is all of my energy keeps going to reacting to the releasing of negativity. So now emotions like fear will latch on harder causing fight or flight...damn, anger sucks, but procrastination and laziness equal failure...stupid fear...
It's a beautiful day out. I'm gonna go for a walk. Develop my intuition.
there is no anger left, even as I replay the situation in my mind, my emotions and reactions were guilty and shameful because I need to accept my limitations and grow from there.
I noticed a lot of anxiety and fear this morning as well. I was sad about how I've lost most of my friends due to my own actions. I was filled with fear but not sure exactly what about.
Ultrasonics played all night. Don't recall the dreams.
Ok. As I write this, a feeling of calm has taken over, I feel good. Peaceful.
I am constantly thinking of what needs to be done or what I could be doing.
I also see why people procrastinate while listening to the sub. It's because all the sludge and sewage of negative emotion is surfacing. I guess what is happening is all of my energy keeps going to reacting to the releasing of negativity. So now emotions like fear will latch on harder causing fight or flight...damn, anger sucks, but procrastination and laziness equal failure...stupid fear...
It's a beautiful day out. I'm gonna go for a walk. Develop my intuition.
