65 days remaining
god i really wanna just switch to EHPRA2.0 when it comes out, but i made a commitment to do OF5G for 96 days, so I will just ride it out. And then maybe 96 days of EHRPA2.0 will be in order, and then I can double barrell shotgun it into round 2 of AM6 and SM3. almost ALL of the internal bullcrap should be gone by then. the only thing worrying me about waiting so long to run SM3 is that I have all the time in the world right now to be the sex magnet... 9 months from now, i may well have a full time job and being a sex magnet would be difficult. although by that time i should have my own place, and being a sex magnet should be much easier with my own place. lmao. anyway i'll cross that bridge when i get there.
i did trickling stream all night, and i was DEAD tired this morning. I couldn't make it to the gym at 7:45 like i wanted to, but i made it at around noon but was still dead tired, and had a massive headache. i chalked it up to not having had my caffeine for the day but even 2 cups of coffee didn't fix it. i'm wondering if trickling stream was too intense for me to handle for a full night?
i also started doing this new method of listening. I wear my headphones around my neck, and play the ultrasonic track. frequensee registers the sound from about 6 inches away from my face, and i can feel that feeling i get when the ultrasonic is playing in my ears. with this method, i can go about my daily life, and idgaf what people think of how i look with headphones around my neck all day. but it's helping me keep my hours up, and gives more of a stereophonic experience than just my tablet blaring ultrasonic from inside my backpack. lol.
this girl messaged me on fb for a ride to her doc appt for her first pregnancy visit. it kinda caught me off guard, but i told her i couldn't because i don't have a vehicle. i asked her how far along she was, and she said "text me, love" and sent me her #. so i texted her, and she said "Hey handsome" & "8 weeks, love". i asked her how she's feeling and she said lonely. i get the hint, but it is kinda awkward if i'm completely honest here. she's carrying someone's kid and she's all flirty and homebody-ish with me. not sure how i want to proceed here.
i'm gonna spend friday nightwith the older woman in my life, and then early the next morning my mexican friend is picking me up and she's taking me on a miniroad trip to a city 2 hrs out from here, just for the day. for something called "the warrior dash", which is a mudding obstacle course.
then sunday, i work in the day time, and then i'll be spending some time with this really beautiful eastern european girl, who i coincidentally will also be seeing tomorrow! this girl's a 10/10 in my eyes, her personality enhances her appearance to a solid 10, and i totally dig it.
i'm really not sure how all this female attention has anything to do with fear, but i am sure it somehow fits into the picture somewhere. i imagine the removal of fear is allowing me to better express the SM3 programming, thus in turn creating positive interactions with the females. one of the members of this forum even commented how on one of my pictures on facebook, i looked a lot "lighter", in that OF5G must have been removing a lot of "weight" from my character, and that being reflected outwardly in my facial expressions. so if that's the case, my approachability must be higher, and my body language must display more comfort. i only wonder what OGSF5G is doing for our comrades running that program!
Part of me is also considering switching to OGSF5G tomorrow, once my 32 days of OF5G is finished so that I can add guilt and shame destruction to my regimen. Rationally, it makes sense, since fear will still be worked on for the 64 days until the completion of my run. but my wallet has other ideas, considering EHPRA 2.0 will be AT LEAST 90 bucks as well, and I figure OGSF is in EHPRA anyway...... so i could just spend the money on EHPRA 2.0 instead of both it AND OGSF5G.
and for what it's worth, i have a feeling EHPRA 2.0 is going to be more than $90, considering all the additional goodies and technology it has within it. although it should be 100% worth it, and looks like it will be an unwritten PREREQUISITE to run a magnet, preferrably before AM6.
so i just let my thoughts flow freely here, don't know where i was going with any of it... but thanks for reading if you are reading this.
peace and love
god i really wanna just switch to EHPRA2.0 when it comes out, but i made a commitment to do OF5G for 96 days, so I will just ride it out. And then maybe 96 days of EHRPA2.0 will be in order, and then I can double barrell shotgun it into round 2 of AM6 and SM3. almost ALL of the internal bullcrap should be gone by then. the only thing worrying me about waiting so long to run SM3 is that I have all the time in the world right now to be the sex magnet... 9 months from now, i may well have a full time job and being a sex magnet would be difficult. although by that time i should have my own place, and being a sex magnet should be much easier with my own place. lmao. anyway i'll cross that bridge when i get there.
i did trickling stream all night, and i was DEAD tired this morning. I couldn't make it to the gym at 7:45 like i wanted to, but i made it at around noon but was still dead tired, and had a massive headache. i chalked it up to not having had my caffeine for the day but even 2 cups of coffee didn't fix it. i'm wondering if trickling stream was too intense for me to handle for a full night?
i also started doing this new method of listening. I wear my headphones around my neck, and play the ultrasonic track. frequensee registers the sound from about 6 inches away from my face, and i can feel that feeling i get when the ultrasonic is playing in my ears. with this method, i can go about my daily life, and idgaf what people think of how i look with headphones around my neck all day. but it's helping me keep my hours up, and gives more of a stereophonic experience than just my tablet blaring ultrasonic from inside my backpack. lol.
this girl messaged me on fb for a ride to her doc appt for her first pregnancy visit. it kinda caught me off guard, but i told her i couldn't because i don't have a vehicle. i asked her how far along she was, and she said "text me, love" and sent me her #. so i texted her, and she said "Hey handsome" & "8 weeks, love". i asked her how she's feeling and she said lonely. i get the hint, but it is kinda awkward if i'm completely honest here. she's carrying someone's kid and she's all flirty and homebody-ish with me. not sure how i want to proceed here.
i'm gonna spend friday nightwith the older woman in my life, and then early the next morning my mexican friend is picking me up and she's taking me on a miniroad trip to a city 2 hrs out from here, just for the day. for something called "the warrior dash", which is a mudding obstacle course.
then sunday, i work in the day time, and then i'll be spending some time with this really beautiful eastern european girl, who i coincidentally will also be seeing tomorrow! this girl's a 10/10 in my eyes, her personality enhances her appearance to a solid 10, and i totally dig it.
i'm really not sure how all this female attention has anything to do with fear, but i am sure it somehow fits into the picture somewhere. i imagine the removal of fear is allowing me to better express the SM3 programming, thus in turn creating positive interactions with the females. one of the members of this forum even commented how on one of my pictures on facebook, i looked a lot "lighter", in that OF5G must have been removing a lot of "weight" from my character, and that being reflected outwardly in my facial expressions. so if that's the case, my approachability must be higher, and my body language must display more comfort. i only wonder what OGSF5G is doing for our comrades running that program!
Part of me is also considering switching to OGSF5G tomorrow, once my 32 days of OF5G is finished so that I can add guilt and shame destruction to my regimen. Rationally, it makes sense, since fear will still be worked on for the 64 days until the completion of my run. but my wallet has other ideas, considering EHPRA 2.0 will be AT LEAST 90 bucks as well, and I figure OGSF is in EHPRA anyway...... so i could just spend the money on EHPRA 2.0 instead of both it AND OGSF5G.
and for what it's worth, i have a feeling EHPRA 2.0 is going to be more than $90, considering all the additional goodies and technology it has within it. although it should be 100% worth it, and looks like it will be an unwritten PREREQUISITE to run a magnet, preferrably before AM6.
so i just let my thoughts flow freely here, don't know where i was going with any of it... but thanks for reading if you are reading this.
peace and love
