"I'm a peacock, you gotta let me fly" - Maverick Journal 2023

[Ampersnd]

Day 173,

Another bomb hit me today.
"The most valuable resource on the planet is human attention and focus. Therefore, it is in your interest to gather, retain, and direct it towards a productive end."

That's your "why" for anything involving public speaking, presentations, leadership, planning, sales/marketing, graphic design, etc.
That is also your "why" for self-actualizing yourself past the restrictions imposed by childhood traumas, guilt, shame, fear, as gathering attention requires removing as many inner contradictions as you can. If you don't, they will stifle the inner urge to change the world for the better.

You can have all of the raw data in the world but it means nothing without a decision-maker to acknowledge it and to use it to inform their decisions.
This is a breakthrough in the other direction; pointing from the stuffy 0s and 1s tech end of things towards the real world.

[Ampersnd]

Day 174,

I REALLY want to run MM. If my intuition keeps pushing me in that direction, I might end Maverick in the next month or so.

I had the realization that I can't stay in my country forever.
Rental prices are out of control. Housing prices are rising with no real sign of stopping; affordability is low.
I'm in my current spot because it works for me, but my ability to adapt is questionable.
If someone were to target me, taking the pragmatic steps to defend myself would lead to legal punishment.
If someone breaks into your house to rob you, and your family is inside, you incur serious charges if you neutralize them.
My ability to maneuver and make meaningful moves is small at this time; I would need a higher revenue to make that work, and to get it from more than a single source and a tied-down schedule.

Basically, I want more flexibility and freedom, which requires moneh. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6xikh2i-1aw
I also want to crystalize and potentially deepen/broaden the recent mindset changes that I've been getting from Maverick.

[racktree]

Genuinely curious.

If you stop with Maverick in the next month, what do you think your results were with this program? 
Did it reach some goal or expectation you had?

Day 174,

I REALLY want to run MM. If my intuition keeps pushing me in that direction, I might end Maverick in the next month or so.

I had the realization that I can't stay in my country forever.
Rental prices are out of control. Housing prices are rising with no real sign of stopping; affordability is low.
I'm in my current spot because it works for me, but my ability to adapt is questionable.
If someone were to target me, taking the pragmatic steps to defend myself would lead to legal punishment.
If someone breaks into your house to rob you, and your family is inside, you incur serious charges if you neutralize them.
My ability to maneuver and make meaningful moves is small at this time; I would need a higher revenue to make that work, and to get it from more than a single source and a tied-down schedule.

Basically, I want more flexibility and freedom, which requires moneh. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6xikh2i-1aw
I also want to crystalize and potentially deepen/broaden the recent mindset changes that I've been getting from Maverick.

[Ampersnd]

Genuinely curious.

If you stop with Maverick in the next month, what do you think your results were with this program? 
Did it reach some goal or expectation you had?

Comparing between my results today and the promises of the marketing copy, no.

• Overcome limiting beliefs that are holding you back. (50 yes/50 no)
• Develop a powerful mindset that empowers you to take action and make bold decisions. (50/50, but improving)
• Cultivate creativity and innovation to generate new ideas and solutions. (50/50)
• Build resilience and persistence to overcome obstacles and setbacks. (75/25)
• Develop a personal brand that sets you apart from the crowd. (80/20)
• Build a network of like-minded individuals who can support and inspire you. (50:50, but much improved from 10/90)
• Open opportunities to you that are hidden from most of the world. (10/90, but improved from 0/100)
• Truly push you to experience what it means to work hard and play harder. (30/70, decreased from 80/20)
• Cultivate incredible situations that allow you to explore new sexual experiences with like minded partners. (15/85)
• Live your greatest life and have a hell of a time doing it! (10/90)

I think the main takeaway so far is that it burst a bubble of delusion I had about myself that I'm not as hot shit as I thought.
It also made my character trait deficiencies more apparent to me, so that I at least have a direct pathway to improve.
The first few months seemed to get better from a superficial standpoint, then that evaporated and I retreated into solitude for a couple of months.

It would be a bad idea to stop now.

[dragonslayer]

Genuinely curious.

If you stop with Maverick in the next month, what do you think your results were with this program? 
Did it reach some goal or expectation you had?

Comparing between my results today and the promises of the marketing copy, no.

• Overcome limiting beliefs that are holding you back. (50 yes/50 no)
• Develop a powerful mindset that empowers you to take action and make bold decisions. (50/50, but improving)
• Cultivate creativity and innovation to generate new ideas and solutions. (50/50)
• Build resilience and persistence to overcome obstacles and setbacks. (75/25)
• Develop a personal brand that sets you apart from the crowd. (80/20)
• Build a network of like-minded individuals who can support and inspire you. (50:50, but much improved from 10/90)
• Open opportunities to you that are hidden from most of the world. (10/90, but improved from 0/100)
• Truly push you to experience what it means to work hard and play harder. (30/70, decreased from 80/20)
• Cultivate incredible situations that allow you to explore new sexual experiences with like minded partners. (15/85)
• Live your greatest life and have a hell of a time doing it! (10/90)

I think the main takeaway so far is that it burst a bubble of delusion I had about myself that I'm not as hot shit as I thought.
It also made my character trait deficiencies more apparent to me, so that I at least have a direct pathway to improve.
The first few months seemed to get better from a superficial standpoint, then that evaporated and I retreated into solitude for a couple of months.

It would be a bad idea to stop now.

Hi @Ampersnd , how long in months and loops is Maverick supposed to be run for?

I wish the description page is available because I want to prepare myself for Maverick.

[Ampersnd]

Comparing between my results today and the promises of the marketing copy, no.

• Overcome limiting beliefs that are holding you back. (50 yes/50 no)
• Develop a powerful mindset that empowers you to take action and make bold decisions. (50/50, but improving)
• Cultivate creativity and innovation to generate new ideas and solutions. (50/50)
• Build resilience and persistence to overcome obstacles and setbacks. (75/25)
• Develop a personal brand that sets you apart from the crowd. (80/20)
• Build a network of like-minded individuals who can support and inspire you. (50:50, but much improved from 10/90)
• Open opportunities to you that are hidden from most of the world. (10/90, but improved from 0/100)
• Truly push you to experience what it means to work hard and play harder. (30/70, decreased from 80/20)
• Cultivate incredible situations that allow you to explore new sexual experiences with like minded partners. (15/85)
• Live your greatest life and have a hell of a time doing it! (10/90)

I think the main takeaway so far is that it burst a bubble of delusion I had about myself that I'm not as hot shit as I thought.
It also made my character trait deficiencies more apparent to me, so that I at least have a direct pathway to improve.
The first few months seemed to get better from a superficial standpoint, then that evaporated and I retreated into solitude for a couple of months.

It would be a bad idea to stop now.

Hi @Ampersnd , how long in months and loops is Maverick supposed to be run for?

I wish the description page is available because I want to prepare myself for Maverick.

Duration: 6 months minimum, but you can keep going. 
Loops: Modified from the sales page:

During Month #1: 2 loops per day on, 1 day on and 3 days off 
During Month #2: 1 loop per day on, 1 day on and 3 days off. 
During Month #3: 1/2 loop (30 minutes) per day on, 1 day on and 3 days off. (Start the loop at the 30 minute mark and let it play to the end once.)
During Month #4 and later: 1/3rd loop (20 minutes) per day on, 1 day on and 3 days off for the third month. (Start the loop at the 40 minute mark and let it play to the end once.)

[dragonslayer]

Hi @Ampersnd , how long in months and loops is Maverick supposed to be run for?

I wish the description page is available because I want to prepare myself for Maverick.

Duration: 6 months minimum, but you can keep going. 
Loops: Modified from the sales page:

During Month #1: 2 loops per day on, 1 day on and 3 days off 
During Month #2: 1 loop per day on, 1 day on and 3 days off. 
During Month #3: 1/2 loop (30 minutes) per day on, 1 day on and 3 days off. (Start the loop at the 30 minute mark and let it play to the end once.)
During Month #4 and later: 1/3rd loop (20 minutes) per day on, 1 day on and 3 days off for the third month. (Start the loop at the 40 minute mark and let it play to the end once.)

Thank you

[racktree]

Genuinely curious.

If you stop with Maverick in the next month, what do you think your results were with this program? 
Did it reach some goal or expectation you had?

Comparing between my results today and the promises of the marketing copy, no.

• Overcome limiting beliefs that are holding you back. (50 yes/50 no)
• Develop a powerful mindset that empowers you to take action and make bold decisions. (50/50, but improving)
• Cultivate creativity and innovation to generate new ideas and solutions. (50/50)
• Build resilience and persistence to overcome obstacles and setbacks. (75/25)
• Develop a personal brand that sets you apart from the crowd. (80/20)
• Build a network of like-minded individuals who can support and inspire you. (50:50, but much improved from 10/90)
• Open opportunities to you that are hidden from most of the world. (10/90, but improved from 0/100)
• Truly push you to experience what it means to work hard and play harder. (30/70, decreased from 80/20)
• Cultivate incredible situations that allow you to explore new sexual experiences with like minded partners. (15/85)
• Live your greatest life and have a hell of a time doing it! (10/90)

I think the main takeaway so far is that it burst a bubble of delusion I had about myself that I'm not as hot shit as I thought.
It also made my character trait deficiencies more apparent to me, so that I at least have a direct pathway to improve.
The first few months seemed to get better from a superficial standpoint, then that evaporated and I retreated into solitude for a couple of months.

It would be a bad idea to stop now.

I think the main takeaway so far is that it burst a bubble of delusion I had about myself that I'm not as hot shit as I thought.

It was not the main takeaway for me but happened to me as well big time time.

[Ampersnd]

Day 176,

Figured that I need to plan my subliminal sequence by taking turns between internal and external. Inner change, then outer change.
Here's my planned listening schedule:
1) Next 2-6 months: Maverick
2) Money Magnet
3) OGSF
4) DMSI or X4A

[Ampersnd]

I'm seriously questioning the "grain of sand" parable I've heard many years ago.
Here's ChatGPT's description of it:

"The grain of sand analogy explains how pearls form in oysters. When a tiny grain of sand or something bothersome gets inside an oyster's shell, it covers the irritation with layers of shiny material called nacre. This makes a pearl. This is like how we can turn tough times in our lives into something good. Just as oysters make pearls out of sand, we can grow and learn from challenges, making us stronger and wiser."

Sure, challenges make us resilient. But is the end product of this adaptation from something traumatic truly functional in the world? As you're building a callus around that inner hurt, a lot of time is passing and world is moving on. Will your 'pearl' be of any use 10 years after the hurt has occurred? Have you wasting resources in building this pearl that could have been dedicated to something more useful? After all, you are much more than a simple oyster; you can move and navigate the world instead of building a pretty stone.

A red-pill solace given to lonely men in their early twenties is that "male life begins at 30". It's a promise that you might toll and suffer now, but there is an escape with enough time and investment. It was something that I was exposed to in my early twenties; I had seen the Sexual Marketplace Value graph comparing men and women's desirability over time/age, and it heartened me that my heart-driving attitudes would pay off.

There is a flip-side; not only does it risks making you passive - as you might not give yourself permission, nor set yourself up, to succeed at 27 or 26 or sooner, - but you risk viewing your success as a way to "get one over" on those who (maybe inadvertently) kicked some grains of sand into your shell, and have since moved on with their lives. You risk building up an entire narrative that has nothing to do with reality.

Miguel de Cervantes' book Don Quixote (which I haven't read) has the expression "tilting at windmills", given that the main character mistakes windmills for giants and charges at them, believing he's engaging in a noble battle. In reality, these enemies are made of wood. Inert matter. It does not care about Quixote, and Quixote cares too much.
Even if Quixote ripped down every last windmill down to the last splinter, he would have actually harmed society, as those structures served a legitimate purpose to produce food for the community (windmills were typically used to grind down flour).

I'm torn between the two poles of A) Get the fuck over yourself and see the good of society and B) You are learning to forego society for its faults.
I am enjoying society's benefits; I enjoy its water supply, its power grid, sleep in a dwelling built of wood and brick, all of which were carried for hundreds of miles by logistics companies. Any one of these things are interrupted, and someone comes to fix it. And yet I want to transcend this dynamic somehow?

As a parallel, I'm caught up between the two attitudes of "trusting the process" and "forcing the outcome" when it comes to success.
Trust: Do what is manageable to you on a daily basis, and have confidence that success will find you.
Force: Put a manic amount of focus and effort into your mission, and accept nothing less than forward progress.

The first involves working at society's pace, the second involves picking up the pace and ignoring what is "normal" or expected.

[Johannesbrst]

I'm seriously questioning the "grain of sand" parable I've heard many years ago.
Here's ChatGPT's description of it:

"The grain of sand analogy explains how pearls form in oysters. When a tiny grain of sand or something bothersome gets inside an oyster's shell, it covers the irritation with layers of shiny material called nacre. This makes a pearl. This is like how we can turn tough times in our lives into something good. Just as oysters make pearls out of sand, we can grow and learn from challenges, making us stronger and wiser."

Sure, challenges make us resilient. But is the end product of this adaptation from something traumatic truly functional in the world? As you're building a callus around that inner hurt, a lot of time is passing and world is moving on. Will your 'pearl' be of any use 10 years after the hurt has occurred? Have you wasting resources in building this pearl that could have been dedicated to something more useful? After all, you are much more than a simple oyster; you can move and navigate the world instead of building a pretty stone.

A red-pill solace given to lonely men in their early twenties is that "male life begins at 30". It's a promise that you might toll and suffer now, but there is an escape with enough time and investment. It was something that I was exposed to in my early twenties; I had seen the Sexual Marketplace Value graph comparing men and women's desirability over time/age, and it heartened me that my heart-driving attitudes would pay off.

There is a flip-side; not only does it risks making you passive - as you might not give yourself permission, nor set yourself up, to succeed at 27 or 26 or sooner, - but you risk viewing your success as a way to "get one over" on those who (maybe inadvertently) kicked some grains of sand into your shell, and have since moved on with their lives. You risk building up an entire narrative that has nothing to do with reality.

Miguel de Cervantes' book Don Quixote (which I haven't read) has the expression "tilting at windmills", given that the main character mistakes windmills for giants and charges at them, believing he's engaging in a noble battle. In reality, these enemies are made of wood. Inert matter. It does not care about Quixote, and Quixote cares too much.
Even if Quixote ripped down every last windmill down to the last splinter, he would have actually harmed society, as those structures served a legitimate purpose to produce food for the community (windmills were typically used to grind down flour).

I'm torn between the two poles of A) Get the fuck over yourself and see the good of society and B) You are learning to forego society for its faults.
I am enjoying society's benefits; I enjoy its water supply, its power grid, sleep in a dwelling built of wood and brick, all of which were carried for hundreds of miles by logistics companies. Any one of these things are interrupted, and someone comes to fix it. And yet I want to transcend this dynamic somehow?

As a parallel, I'm caught up between the two attitudes of "trusting the process" and "forcing the outcome" when it comes to success.
Trust: Do what is manageable to you on a daily basis, and have confidence that success will find you.
Force: Put a manic amount of focus and effort into your mission, and accept nothing less than forward progress.

The first involves working at society's pace, the second involves picking up the pace and ignoring what is "normal" or expected.

Could it be the purpose to learn how to oscillate between the two poles and seeing the truth in both, rather than finding one as true and the other as not?

Came to think about a quote by Carl Jung i read the other day.

“If the unconscious can be recognized as a co-determining factor along with consciousness, and if we can live in such a way that conscious and unconscious demands are taken into account as far as possible, then the centre of gravity of the total personality shifts its position. It is then no longer in the ego, which is merely the centre of consciousness, but in the hypothetical point between conscious and unconscious. This new centre might be called the self.”

[Ampersnd]

Could it be the purpose to learn how to oscillate between the two poles and seeing the truth in both, rather than finding one as true and the other as not?

Thanks for the response; though I am going to challenge the underlying thought behind it.
I hear what you're saying, but would you be willing to offer practical insight of 'what seeing the truth in both' might look like?

Otherwise, it comes across as a basic "both sides" comment, which literally any person on the planet can issue.
"There's bad on both the side of liberals and conservatives," sure, but what is *your* vision for how things should work?
What is the signature Johannesbrst way of seeing things?

Note: And I realize that my wording made it seem like I had to choose one of the two poles. There's a high probability that the answer will come from integrating the two.

[Johannesbrst]

Could it be the purpose to learn how to oscillate between the two poles and seeing the truth in both, rather than finding one as true and the other as not?

Thanks for the response; though I am going to challenge the underlying thought behind it.
I hear what you're saying, but would you be willing to offer practical insight of 'what seeing the truth in both' might look like?

Otherwise, it comes across as a basic "both sides" comment, which literally any person on the planet can issue.
"There's bad on both the side of liberals and conservatives," sure, but what is *your* vision for how things should work?
What is the signature Johannesbrst way of seeing things?

Note: And I realize that my wording made it seem like I had to choose one of the two poles. There's a high probability that the answer will come from integrating the two.

What have been put in bold is perhaps what I had in mind. Being able to hold both things true in your mind until a new perspective emerges. 

The frustration of keeping both perspectives in mind and seeing how they both are valid, indicate that there is an underlying level of seeing things that you haven't reached insight about yet. This causes frustration, which is why people seldom engage in this type of practise. 

I find the question of what a "signature way of seeing things" is to be somewhat problematic, as it implies there can be found a defined personal logic used for making all your decisions. 

If we identify to much with our persona, I.e. the image we present to other people, we feel the need to have a "definition" of who we are and how we are separated from others. 

The place where the persona emerges from is a place where we experience life, rather than a place where we try to give others a sensible understanding of what we stand for (the persona) and in the former there is no need for definitions of the self and how it makes decisions.

Definitions of ourselves are only needed for helping other people get a sense of who we "are", which by it nature will always be a great over-sinplification, and we need to see those definitions for their simplified purpose, rather than a necessity for ourselves to ponder.

But to give a sense of what has been guiding my way of thinking is finding sensible quotes by others that challenge the way I perceive things and try to remember those when I find myself in a position where a decision need to be made.

[Ampersnd]

Appreciate the response.

I like these passages:
[*] If we identify to much with our persona, I.e. the image we present to other people, we feel the need to have a "definition" of who we are and how we are separated from others.
[*] Definitions of ourselves are only needed for helping other people get a sense of who we "are", which by it nature will always be a great over-simplification, and we need to see those definitions for their simplified purpose, rather than a necessity for ourselves to ponder.

I'm bit into wordplay and wordsmithing, but that in itself might be a trap. Good definitions require for 100% of the things it references to be included in the definition, excluding the rest, and I think that this might be stifling me, having to fit perfectly into the labels or needing to find the perfect label.