Not much happening, but as Zane said there's a lot less interest in porn/fapping for me too.
Last night was the end of run 2. Two days off now.
My cold is really on its way out now. I've managed three days in a row of proper exercise, hoping to make today the fourth. Finally back to my previous routine and I'm enjoying it.
Not feeling confident, cocky or sexy though.
Can't remember too much of last night's dream... but I was playing a game versus children and repeatedly beating them. Apparently this was important to me.
I'm starting to obsess slightly about my ’celeb' client again, which is something that has happened on DMSI before. She's not even that hot, but definitely has some sex appeal for me (and I think that we're emotional tight), so if the sniper starts to work she's going to get it.
This is how I use the fapping I suppose... to ward off the libido and stop me obsessing about women. Therefore my next goal is to stop giving a shit about women. I'd love to get more done business and study wise. Women take up way too much attention and time for me.
I definitely feel less socially confident than I did a year or two ago. I'm looking forward to the ASC kicking in too.
5 loops US over my phone speaker (S7+)
I am feeling a bit more confident today. Had a few bits of eye contact in the pub tonight.
My exercise motivation is about 70% there, which is good.
Had some poor sex with my gf yesterday. My penis felt almost numb for most of it, but the orgasm was massive, almost painful.
No thoughts of fapping for the last three days.
The urge to fap is still minimal. That's fantastic.
Confidence is meh.
I had a dream last night about fighting aliens who had taken over some time ago. We had to go fighting room by room, then retreat to safety. I can't quite work out if the unwelcome aliens are me fighting the sub, or me fighting my fears.
There was also a sealed off section of the city that could only be accessed via a bridge which required an STD test before it could be crossed.
Sex with my gf today was better than last time.
Holding steady on the lack of desire to fap. This is great. However, my libido also seems lower.... which makes it easier to concentrate, but doesn't mean that I'm focusing on the goal much!
Not feeling sexy, and I feel like I've put on a bit of weight / lost some definition over the last four months or so.
Not feeling socially confident either.
What I don't get is that the sub is clearly working in terms of the fapping... but not yet working for anything else. How is my subconscious picking and choosing like that?
When you shine a light at a wood plank wall, the light gets through where the planks are not.
Right now, apparently, it has dealt with the fear that resulted in fapping, but it isn't finished working on some other things yet.
(12-28-2018, 04:55 PM)swisston Wrote: [ -> ]Holding steady on the lack of desire to fap. This is great. However, my libido also seems lower.... which makes it easier to concentrate, but doesn't mean that I'm focusing on the goal much!
Not feeling sexy, and I feel like I've put on a bit of weight / lost some definition over the last four months or so.
Not feeling socially confident either.
What I don't get is that the sub is clearly working in terms of the fapping... but not yet working for anything else. How is my subconscious picking and choosing like that?
If nothing else can be said for this version is this that Shannon has got the no flap down much better in this version. Now if only the other things would be coming along as well
There was no change to the anti-masturbation-as-sabotage script from 3.2 to 3.3. The only thing that changed on that was the FRM enabling it to work. The other things are coming along, but apparently you guys are fighting the FRM a lot more than I expected, making it take longer than expected to work.
May have spoken a bit too soon about the lack of libido. It went a bit crazy last night and I ended up fapping, with a follow up marathon porn session. It felt like a release.
I guess it's a resistance blow back. I'll try not to let it happen again, but there's 30 years of habit to undo....
I've had a couple more stares from women recently, but nothing impressive.
Still managing to stick to the 5 loops and 5 days plan. Sometimes hybrid, sometimes US, always over night. Only a couple of minor issues so far (playback randomly stopping, dead battery on headphones).
Again last night, the Google player app just stopped about four loops in. No idea why. Very annoying.
It's weird how inconsistent these players are.
It strikes me as... impossible. I see it to. I think it has something to do with manipulation by the subconscious mind.
And once again, I have a cold. Brilliant.
At lunch time in the pub, I had a nice long (by normal standards) eye contact with an attractive woman as she walked past, and I smiled at her. It didn't feel forced, and the smile came naturally. It felt a bit like we were acknowledging each other and then moving on.
Nothing much to report from the last couple of days.
Fapped yesterday. I think that's happening about once per week, which is better than it was before.
The fapping is getting out of control again. Five times in two days.