AM6 Stage 1 Day 15
Drove to the place where I drop my mail. Some dorky woman has her car door open and looks at me. WTF? I swerve around it and PARK. Get out of my truck. I walk in with that woman slightly behind, she's carrying a rather large package. I look back for a second and proceed to hold the door but not long enough since I remember "what has this broad ever done for me?" - it smacks into her awkwardly, making an audible whack while I keep walking never looking back. A man on a mission. I courteously get what I need and get out of there while she is only able to stare at me with intense eye contact as I pull out and drive off. Not today, sweetie. Maybe 15 years ago.
Oh, yeah. It's back. I think the feebleness from DMSI finally wore off.
Alpha male made me more chivalrous, opening doors for people more, and more courteous and respectful.
(12-17-2017, 08:47 AM)Raykon Wrote: [ -> ]Alpha male made me more chivalrous, opening doors for people more, and more courteous and respectful.
Holy shit. Noticed the same thing it's like I'm becoming nicer and more generous.
I wish I could be nice and generous, but I got into my head that most attractive women don't respond to that. I think that started when I read my first PUA material based around being 'cocky & funny'. I feel like total crap and conflicted. I have this attitude of "society hasn't given me a girlfriend, so society can fuck off". Yeah, my entitlement is pretty extreme.
Today I saw this really homely but still fertile and attractive red haired girl in the laundromat reading a book, dressed down in a tee shirt but wow, that body. We exchanged glances and that was it. I didn't dare do more, because I have this idea in my head that if I approach ANY girl, it's "creepy, predatory, unwanted" etc. And I didn't want to embarrass myself around the old and ugly people in that laundromat for whatever reason or face some type of fictional persecution if I express interest in a lone female. Even if I could tell she was into me because she held the eye contact longer while I was folding clothes, it's like there was an invisible barrier so I got mad and left.
It's fucking ridiculous. 1. women are NOT flirting anymore and are NOT open and friendly, thus signalling men to approach and 2. men are creep shamed if they do try to nudge a girl to the next step of an interaction. I have to keep reminding myself of my own attractiveness, that I actually am attractive and well dressed, I'm much better off than most people around here and have plenty to offer.
I did get good rapport going with a female store clerk today who was into me and laughing, but 35+ so maybe that's why she still had social skills from a past era. This is all making me frustrated and any expectations I have are being destroyed. Another hot young woman who was socially inept interrupted me and her coworker helping me in a store trying to get my attention obviously but not in a direct way, so nothing came of that either.
And I started Stage 2 today. Woopty-doo.
Then I meet older people who are boomer age and they say, "I thought I'd see you with a girl this time", "why don't you get a girlfriend and blah blah blah", "maybe you'll find a girlfriend in town", etc. WELL OBVIOUSLY NOT, GRAMPS. At this point it's almost like nuclear war would be favorable to the dating scene. Obviously women don't need men for their self-esteem any longer so they don't show their 'love' for men, either.
OK, I'm tired of being such a woman hater since I obviously passed up a chance with a possible introverted redheaded gf today. As you can tell I have a massive victim complex and negative vibe from my posts above. I've been engaged in cultural/psychological warfare and have had some of the most advanced mindbreak demoralization tactics used against me on another forum for a few years now as well as being engaged in the self-defeating MGTOW movement. Yes, I do take the 'battle of the sexes' very seriously but now realize I must rise above and become a... Leader. Yuck, it was really hard to type that word. I'd still rather watch this society burn but let's try a different approach.
Running AM6 a fourth time can't really be that great for me, except turn me into a womanizing tyrant at this rate (if it would do anything at all since I'm not quite a womanizer yet, now am I???). So, instead I plan to do ONE HELL OF A SPRING CLEANING and run Universal Detox. My theory is it will keep me out of the lower levels of this chart:
[attachment=606]
By obliterating such foulness from my consciousness, I will have a much stronger base for any future subliminals. I might even become happy, who knows. Will I get a girlfriend? Doubtful.
I feel so defeated I don't even believe in the law of attraction anymore.
Also, I recently discovered one of the most powerful cutting edge detox methods available (aside from Shannon's subs of course). In a study, this orally administered substance was given to mice and doubled their lifespans, plus made them immune to radiation. Human testers have reported effects from clear-headedness and increased endurance to actually injuring their tendons because they were able to lift crazy amounts of weight in the gym. It is an antioxidant 172x more powerful than Vitamin C. It's the molecule Carbon 60.
So, that's the goal. To regain my innocence, zest of a teenager, strength, and overcome terrible demoralization.
It's interesting how the information we consume is exactly like the quality of foods we consume;
- Consume junk information in the form of hate and the mind becomes unhealthy
So I'm starting to feel a little motivated on UD and burst into some spontaneous dancing the first day, was already feeling very light on my feet. Plenty of junk to clear out mentally as well as physically (I'm pretty good on the spiritual aspect, I'd say). Sometimes I feel like a thorn in Shannon's and this forum's side since I spout all kinds of self-righteous opinions with plenty of emotional fire at times but I'm an Aries (fire sign) for what it's worth.
The new era of self-improvement (without AM6) is at hand. I'm motivated to take up the Wim Hof method challenge and with those breathing techniques I will be immune to heat, cold, and radiation (thanks to carbon 60). What a combo. This is really approaching superhuman abilities if I can stick with it. I've had ZERO, 0 motivation for doing real stuff in the real world, except for research so this will be interesting. Might even join a yoga class to impress some chickies with my superhuman strength. Well, let's not get too ahead of ourselves.
Those Wim Hof breathing techniques can reportedly roll a person's metabolic age back 15 years, making me a teenager in that sense. With synergistic effects from other practices, well, could almost be at the era of age reversal. Why am I so obsessed with youth? Yang. FIRE. Oh yeah, baby. It's related to youth while I see Yin more as stagnation.
I've been pondering this analogy I partially picked up here or somewhere else that related to yin-yang...
Men can either Create or Destroy, Women either can Nuture or Corrupt.
Btw I think I'm a really cool guy because whatever Shannon puts me on, I always go beyond it.
Pfft... Detox? Let's focus on total Immunity.
I also watched a Mantalk Chia interview and that cheered me up this morning (London Real Interview).
Made me realize I need to really focus my attention (inner smile technique) and be careful of where I place it.
Also I learned that in Kaballah, Man is the Light while Woman is the Vessel. Humans emit all kinds of photons from their eyeballs so if you are giving a woman attention... Now I know why women crave attention.
Also I once read a book written by trees about how much trees enjoyed it when Humans gave them their attention and light/love but let's not get too woo-woo.
I'm back to my awesome journal, kicking ass. Not much to say, just checking in.
Earlier today, when I woke up at 2PM, I had real trouble getting out of bed because my mind was working magnificently. I was able to connect all kinds of abstract ideas and bring them into awareness in visual form, almost. I was having inner monologues and all kinds of insights. For a moment, I could almost conceive of how the great architects built the ornate Gothic temples and churches because my mind was moving towards those types of geometric patterns and organization within my imagination. That was from 4 days on UD. Then I did the Wim Hof Breathing exercises for the first time ever and got out of bed.
Still awkward in public with females, avoiding them. I did yell to some teenage girl that she had a fat ass because she was walking slowly in front of my truck then I drove off. Too bad she was obese and I didn't mean it in a good way. Har har har!
There's a great book called You're Not Fat, You're Toxic written by an Australian woman I approve of and is a worthy compilation of research.
Maybe I just need to come to terms that I live in an area full of sexually repressed toxic obese people? Nah.
Gonna type more on my phone.
The fat girl could drive and was looking at me expectanty, btw.
The concept of the false light. Modern women have imbibed a "false light" in a spiritual sense. Throughout their day they are absorbed in the false light of their cell phone social media. Or perhaps television (last show I accidentally caught was about dykes in prison lmao) and media feeding them self-aggrandizement. Thus, their cup runneth over as I heard one man say. Is there roometh for a manneth in thou life? What I really hate is how teenage girls lay on the fake compliments to each other so thick. I swear to god it makes me want to slap a ho. I've even noticed this with store clerks while they then turn and act mannish, talking about their menopause or guns with me lol wtf. Babble that boggles the mind.
I'm simply on too high of a level. I propose that the 'matrix' is conspiring against me because if I had a hot young chick to have regular (tantric) sex with and fuel me, my power would be unstoppable.
I have some book titles on sexual surrender and feminine behavior that I may share. Why do I read this shit? Haha... Good question.
Did anyone see those times? That's some classic numerology. I wasn't watching the clock or anything, since those were typed on two different platforms. Ah, yes, I am sent from the heavens and have divine synchronicity.
Taken from :
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Evolutiona...depression
Behavioral shutdown model
The behavioral shutdown model states that if an organism faces more risk or expenditure than reward from activities, the best evolutionary strategy may be to withdraw from them. This model proposes that emotional pain, like physical pain, serves a useful adaptive purpose. Negative emotions like disappointment, sadness, grief, fear, anxiety, anger, and guilt are described as "evolved strategies that allow for the identification and avoidance of specific problems, especially in the social domain." Depression is characteristically associated with anhedonia and lack of energy, and those experiencing it are risk-aversive and perceive more negative and pessimistic outcomes because they are focused on preventing further loss. Although the model views depression as an adaptive response, it does not suggest that it is beneficial by the standards of current society; but it does suggest that many approaches to depression treat symptoms rather than causes, and underlying social problems need to be addressed.[23]
A related phenomenon to the behavioral shutdown model is learned helplessness. In animal subjects, a loss of control or predictability in the subject's experiences results in a condition similar to clinical depression in humans. That is to say, if uncontrollable and unstoppable stressors are repeated for long enough, a rat subject will adopt a learned helplessness, which shares a number of behavioral and psychological features with human depression. The subject will not attempt to cope with problems, even when placed in a stressor-free novel environment. Should their rare attempts at coping prove successful in a new environment, a long lasting cognitive block prevents them from perceiving their action as useful and their coping strategy does not last long. From an evolutionary perspective, learned helplessness also allows a conservation of energy for an extended period of time should people find themselves in a predicament that is outside of their control, such as an illness or a dry season. However, for today's humans whose depression resembles learned helplessness, this phenomenon usually manifests as a loss of motivation and the distortion of one uncontrollable aspect of a person's life being viewed as representative of all aspects of their life – suggesting a mismatch between ultimate cause and modern manifestation.[24]
I do look forward to the addition of Positive Thinking and Everything Is Possible added to the DMSI script which I believe has been recognized as a winning combo.
(01-07-2018, 07:22 PM)RisingSon Wrote: [ -> ]Did anyone see those times? That's some classic numerology. I wasn't watching the clock or anything, since those were typed on two different platforms. Ah, yes, I am sent from the heavens and have divine synchronicity.
Taken from : https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Evolutiona...depression
Behavioral shutdown model
The behavioral shutdown model states that if an organism faces more risk or expenditure than reward from activities, the best evolutionary strategy may be to withdraw from them. This model proposes that emotional pain, like physical pain, serves a useful adaptive purpose. Negative emotions like disappointment, sadness, grief, fear, anxiety, anger, and guilt are described as "evolved strategies that allow for the identification and avoidance of specific problems, especially in the social domain." Depression is characteristically associated with anhedonia and lack of energy, and those experiencing it are risk-aversive and perceive more negative and pessimistic outcomes because they are focused on preventing further loss. Although the model views depression as an adaptive response, it does not suggest that it is beneficial by the standards of current society; but it does suggest that many approaches to depression treat symptoms rather than causes, and underlying social problems need to be addressed.[23]
A related phenomenon to the behavioral shutdown model is learned helplessness. In animal subjects, a loss of control or predictability in the subject's experiences results in a condition similar to clinical depression in humans. That is to say, if uncontrollable and unstoppable stressors are repeated for long enough, a rat subject will adopt a learned helplessness, which shares a number of behavioral and psychological features with human depression. The subject will not attempt to cope with problems, even when placed in a stressor-free novel environment. Should their rare attempts at coping prove successful in a new environment, a long lasting cognitive block prevents them from perceiving their action as useful and their coping strategy does not last long. From an evolutionary perspective, learned helplessness also allows a conservation of energy for an extended period of time should people find themselves in a predicament that is outside of their control, such as an illness or a dry season. However, for today's humans whose depression resembles learned helplessness, this phenomenon usually manifests as a loss of motivation and the distortion of one uncontrollable aspect of a person's life being viewed as representative of all aspects of their life – suggesting a mismatch between ultimate cause and modern manifestation.[24]
I do look forward to the addition of Positive Thinking and Everything Is Possible added to the DMSI script which I believe has been recognized as a winning combo.
This is a very important post imo.
Today I was noticing how I have this sort of "surrendered to the inevitable" vibe. I had an anxiety headache on the way home from sales, for example, because of this.
What I think is happening is, as I try more and more things, and fail more and more (as a result) the failures keep re-affiriming my negative beliefs. I'm not sure how you overcome that without improving your skill in pulling off whatever it is you need to pull off.
Let's take approaching women, if you get rejected 8/10 times, and the rejections are more emotionally impactful than the non-rejections, you'll keep re-affirming whatever negative beliefs you have about why you think it is women reject you.
So, I hope Shannon can overcome this because for myself, I've noticed I've gotten some VERY negative thought patterns lately, and I don't think it's H/C, I think it's just that as I keep pushing myself but keep failing, I'm getting more and more "evidence" for the learned helplessness mentality.