05-07-2017, 12:55 PM
This is day 5 of B.
Again feeling the heat collecting in my back and slowly expanding into the rest of my body. It's a nice feeling.
Girls are continuously giving me subtle/small signs of interest. On Friday while I was on the train a brunette caught my interest, cute face with very sexy eyes. Could have a bit more "visible" jawlines. But still a very good looking girl. Flipping her hair, looking etc together with her "girl gang".
I went and got a haircut and then just enjoyed the sun in the park. I sat there for about 1-hour and allowed DMSI to enjoy the energy since I was in need of food. When I'm leaving the park for the subway. Guess which girl gang I ran into? The same one from the train. That does not happen. They saw me and started going the same direction, going faster than me. When they "randomly" started going slower so I got a very good view of their asses. They eventually went into a mall, but the cute girl seemed reluctant like she didn't really wanna go there. I am assuming that is because she didn't wanna leave me "out of her sight".
Anyways I meet up with my friends and we go on our short road trip. When we arrived and sat down every girl had their feet pointed towards me, mostly in weird positions. Like in very unnatural positions.
We played soccer and had a good time. I got tired due to bad sleep and started going away where one girl approaches me and said she was having thought of going for a walk. Here I get the thought "Yea, she wants me to go with her but she's awkward and didn't know how to express herself without losing the opportunity". So I just agreed to her answer (lol) and started going with her. I am not that much of a talker so I let her do that. Eventually, another of my friends asked if they were interrupting or if we wanted to hang with them. I wanted to see what this girl would do, so I didn't say anything where she said: "yea, we can hang out".
She most likely wanted me to say we could join them later or something (she took her time answering them) but I wanted to see her reaction so I didn't. This kinda "killed it" and nothing more happened, for now.
Sometime around 1 AM a few of us decided to swim. Eventually, we get into a sauna where this girl (the same who asked if I wanted to walk with her) complains about it being "too hot". So she goes to the water bucket that is conveniently in front of me. Bends over and splashes water on her face. She does this for a very long time. Much more than needed, and she definitely didn't need to bend over. I had an urge to say/do something. But resisted because a friend in the sauna likes her. I don't have any interest in her as well so I'd rather keep my friend than lose him over a girl of not much interest to me.
Next day when we stood in a line she asked if she could get in front of me, I saw no reason of why she should. So I said no. Now I'm wondering if she wanted to give me more butt presentations as she also wore a bikini now.
All of us went home yesterday and she didn't even say bye - LOL
I feel like DMSI is definitely doing its thing. Like girls are somewhat subtle, but still. Asking me out (as long we're acquaintances) and at least trying to get me excluded from everybody else so "they can have me for themselves". The problem is that I'm not always willing to do so with the girls who do ask me out. Or I simply play along for a while, but not doing what's necessary to achieve sex. Since girls are supposed to do "all the work" to the degree I allow them to. Not sure what that really means...
If I should agree more (to build up to the sex), or if girls are gonna/should be more obvious with their requests.
I haven't been approached by a random girl, and I am not sure if DMSI is gonna make that happen. The goal is to get girls to approach you for sex. But it doesn't say "girls that are strangers". I seem to get most obvious results from strangers, with the IoIs and everything. But I actually get THE results from girls that I know, that doesn't seem hit by the aura. At least not where I get these obvious IoIs that I get from strangers, not sure if that is because these random girls are being more obvious so that I'll do something right there and then "before the opportunity is lost" and girls I know doesn't want to embarrass themselves. Or because it hits strangers harder because some of them are more attractive.
I had a similar experience to what Illumi had with blondie. Something that emotionally hurt me, something that wants me to put up my shell again. I wanna move past from what happened to me without dealing with it. Because dealing with it is painful. Painful emotionally and I don't like emotions. But I know not dealing with it will leave me with more baggage. I am questioning again whether I should aim to achieve my personal goals, and just (for now) leave this behind. Or if I should deal with it and really get past it.
I have more understanding for the guys who doesn't want healing/clearing. Because it's painful, it makes you relive the pain you experienced in the past. But now you don't necessarily HAVE to experience it.
Logically I know I should deal with this now rather than later, but emotionally I just wanna move on.
This also brings me back to whether I should use A or B. Do I wanna solve everything or do I simply wanna get results?
-------------------------------------------------------
So I never managed to post this before I had to leave. Just came home (again).
Really beginning to considering running the sub during night. Would make things easier, but still a bit uncertain if I should do that just now. Kinda feels more like I just have to get some good habits for when I wake up etc.
Anyways there's been a girl I've talked about earlier with a hot face but not really the best body (first time I saw her was post #4). Saw each other again today. I don't know what it is but there's something that I just love with her. It's like we have a special connection. Similar to how Shannon said in his journal he's been thinking about girls who he has a primal attraction with or something like that. It could definitely be something of that kind.
I saw her multiple times walking toward me and I had a feeling she was gonna initiate a conversation. However, I had to leave so she couldn't "make it" to me. But it's most likely just a short matter of time before she does. If nothing happens from her side next time I will initiate because there's something about her that I really like and if we don't click later on (which I doubt) I can always use her for invites to parties
Still unclear on what version to run. Something I'll think on overnight.
Again feeling the heat collecting in my back and slowly expanding into the rest of my body. It's a nice feeling.
Girls are continuously giving me subtle/small signs of interest. On Friday while I was on the train a brunette caught my interest, cute face with very sexy eyes. Could have a bit more "visible" jawlines. But still a very good looking girl. Flipping her hair, looking etc together with her "girl gang".
I went and got a haircut and then just enjoyed the sun in the park. I sat there for about 1-hour and allowed DMSI to enjoy the energy since I was in need of food. When I'm leaving the park for the subway. Guess which girl gang I ran into? The same one from the train. That does not happen. They saw me and started going the same direction, going faster than me. When they "randomly" started going slower so I got a very good view of their asses. They eventually went into a mall, but the cute girl seemed reluctant like she didn't really wanna go there. I am assuming that is because she didn't wanna leave me "out of her sight".
Anyways I meet up with my friends and we go on our short road trip. When we arrived and sat down every girl had their feet pointed towards me, mostly in weird positions. Like in very unnatural positions.
We played soccer and had a good time. I got tired due to bad sleep and started going away where one girl approaches me and said she was having thought of going for a walk. Here I get the thought "Yea, she wants me to go with her but she's awkward and didn't know how to express herself without losing the opportunity". So I just agreed to her answer (lol) and started going with her. I am not that much of a talker so I let her do that. Eventually, another of my friends asked if they were interrupting or if we wanted to hang with them. I wanted to see what this girl would do, so I didn't say anything where she said: "yea, we can hang out".
She most likely wanted me to say we could join them later or something (she took her time answering them) but I wanted to see her reaction so I didn't. This kinda "killed it" and nothing more happened, for now.
Sometime around 1 AM a few of us decided to swim. Eventually, we get into a sauna where this girl (the same who asked if I wanted to walk with her) complains about it being "too hot". So she goes to the water bucket that is conveniently in front of me. Bends over and splashes water on her face. She does this for a very long time. Much more than needed, and she definitely didn't need to bend over. I had an urge to say/do something. But resisted because a friend in the sauna likes her. I don't have any interest in her as well so I'd rather keep my friend than lose him over a girl of not much interest to me.
Next day when we stood in a line she asked if she could get in front of me, I saw no reason of why she should. So I said no. Now I'm wondering if she wanted to give me more butt presentations as she also wore a bikini now.
All of us went home yesterday and she didn't even say bye - LOL
I feel like DMSI is definitely doing its thing. Like girls are somewhat subtle, but still. Asking me out (as long we're acquaintances) and at least trying to get me excluded from everybody else so "they can have me for themselves". The problem is that I'm not always willing to do so with the girls who do ask me out. Or I simply play along for a while, but not doing what's necessary to achieve sex. Since girls are supposed to do "all the work" to the degree I allow them to. Not sure what that really means...
If I should agree more (to build up to the sex), or if girls are gonna/should be more obvious with their requests.
I haven't been approached by a random girl, and I am not sure if DMSI is gonna make that happen. The goal is to get girls to approach you for sex. But it doesn't say "girls that are strangers". I seem to get most obvious results from strangers, with the IoIs and everything. But I actually get THE results from girls that I know, that doesn't seem hit by the aura. At least not where I get these obvious IoIs that I get from strangers, not sure if that is because these random girls are being more obvious so that I'll do something right there and then "before the opportunity is lost" and girls I know doesn't want to embarrass themselves. Or because it hits strangers harder because some of them are more attractive.
I had a similar experience to what Illumi had with blondie. Something that emotionally hurt me, something that wants me to put up my shell again. I wanna move past from what happened to me without dealing with it. Because dealing with it is painful. Painful emotionally and I don't like emotions. But I know not dealing with it will leave me with more baggage. I am questioning again whether I should aim to achieve my personal goals, and just (for now) leave this behind. Or if I should deal with it and really get past it.
I have more understanding for the guys who doesn't want healing/clearing. Because it's painful, it makes you relive the pain you experienced in the past. But now you don't necessarily HAVE to experience it.
Logically I know I should deal with this now rather than later, but emotionally I just wanna move on.
This also brings me back to whether I should use A or B. Do I wanna solve everything or do I simply wanna get results?
-------------------------------------------------------
So I never managed to post this before I had to leave. Just came home (again).
Really beginning to considering running the sub during night. Would make things easier, but still a bit uncertain if I should do that just now. Kinda feels more like I just have to get some good habits for when I wake up etc.
Anyways there's been a girl I've talked about earlier with a hot face but not really the best body (first time I saw her was post #4). Saw each other again today. I don't know what it is but there's something that I just love with her. It's like we have a special connection. Similar to how Shannon said in his journal he's been thinking about girls who he has a primal attraction with or something like that. It could definitely be something of that kind.
I saw her multiple times walking toward me and I had a feeling she was gonna initiate a conversation. However, I had to leave so she couldn't "make it" to me. But it's most likely just a short matter of time before she does. If nothing happens from her side next time I will initiate because there's something about her that I really like and if we don't click later on (which I doubt) I can always use her for invites to parties
Still unclear on what version to run. Something I'll think on overnight.