I know I haven't been journaling lately but I thought this was a good point to jump back in it. I tried to post a journal a few days ago but the site crashed and I didn't feel like typing it all up again.
Ran all the versions of DMSI and feel like I saw some solid effects from it. Since beginning with 3.0.1A I've noticed the following effects:
Day 1-3 loops of hybrid trickling stream felt highly anxious and wanted to hide and avoid social contact
Day 2- 3 loops us. Much less anxious but starting to feel nostalgic and thinking about the past mainly my ex.
Day 3- 3 loops us. Increased nostalgia, really feeling like my old foolish self like I did years ago. Still thinking about my ex, had a weird thought of going down town on my own and just visiting the area where she works. We used to frequent that area a lot when we were together, but she didn't work there yet. I'm feeling so nostalgic for the past
If I did that I probably wouldn't be able to tell my current gf about it, she wouldn't like that. I'm not sure where the sub is taking me but we'll see.
Also listening to this sub during the day always puts me out to sleep and I feel groggy and tired even after 12+ hours of sleep
You're obviously stuck on the ex, and that is getting in the way of you achieving the goals of the program, so the program is getting you to heal and clear everything in that direction and let go of the past.
I'm experiencing the same thing right now, lots of anger and anxiety connected to my ex. Interesting...
I'm not really experiencing anger or anxiety, just nostalgia. I used to be so foolish and put women on a pedestal, but after I went through a rough patch I basically feel like I carry a weight in my chest and Im just not hopeful or optimistic about any aspect of life. I feel like I was fed a lie
Humans seem to be designed to lie to each other almost constantly when it comes to relationships...
(12-05-2016, 11:51 AM)Shannon Wrote: [ -> ]Humans seem to be designed to lie to each other almost constantly when it comes to relationships...
How can I become more honest in regards to relationships? Like how did you get to that point?
(12-05-2016, 11:57 AM)Aventus45 Wrote: [ -> ] (12-05-2016, 11:51 AM)Shannon Wrote: [ -> ]Humans seem to be designed to lie to each other almost constantly when it comes to relationships...
How can I become more honest in regards to relationships? Like how did you get to that point?
I stopped lying. It's pretty simple, when you realize that...
A) It's either a truth or a lie, and anything else is just a lie you're telling yourself to make it okay that it's actually a lie, and
B) I would rather be genuinely happy than deal with bullshit.
Takes balls, I'll give you that, but when you realize that the most valuable resource you have is time, and you're wasting it by lying, you stop lying.
(12-05-2016, 12:00 PM)Shannon Wrote: [ -> ] (12-05-2016, 11:57 AM)Aventus45 Wrote: [ -> ] (12-05-2016, 11:51 AM)Shannon Wrote: [ -> ]Humans seem to be designed to lie to each other almost constantly when it comes to relationships...
How can I become more honest in regards to relationships? Like how did you get to that point?
I stopped lying. It's pretty simple, when you realize that...
A) It's either a truth or a lie, and anything else is just a lie you're telling yourself to make it okay that it's actually a lie, and
B) I would rather be genuinely happy than deal with *****.
Takes balls, I'll give you that, but when you realize that the most valuable resource you have is time, and you're wasting it by lying, you stop lying.
Thanks Shannon. It's one of the things that I want to embody but I don't think I'm up to that stage of life. Does the healing module make get me to that point of honest expression in regards to women?
Edit: sorry for the derail ;p
(12-05-2016, 12:03 PM)Aventus45 Wrote: [ -> ] (12-05-2016, 12:00 PM)Shannon Wrote: [ -> ] (12-05-2016, 11:57 AM)Aventus45 Wrote: [ -> ] (12-05-2016, 11:51 AM)Shannon Wrote: [ -> ]Humans seem to be designed to lie to each other almost constantly when it comes to relationships...
How can I become more honest in regards to relationships? Like how did you get to that point?
I stopped lying. It's pretty simple, when you realize that...
A) It's either a truth or a lie, and anything else is just a lie you're telling yourself to make it okay that it's actually a lie, and
B) I would rather be genuinely happy than deal with *****.
Takes balls, I'll give you that, but when you realize that the most valuable resource you have is time, and you're wasting it by lying, you stop lying.
Thanks Shannon. It's one of the things that I want to embody but I don't think I'm up to that stage of life. Does the healing module make get me to that point of honest expression in regards to women?
Edit: sorry for the derail ;p
The healing module is designed to cause you to clear away and heal all of everything that stands in your way in terms of achieving the goals of DMSI.
Doesn't seem likely to me, but it's certainly possible. Especially since such a man is extremely attractive to women.
No major changes since the last update. Still feeling a little nostalgic, and I feel hints of optimism every now and then which makes my chest feel lighter.
Experiencing a lot of tiredness and grogginess. Get a lot of sleep but still feel the need for more.
Update time, I'm noticing that everyone is more friendly than usual and they always want to talk to me or seek my approval of things. Other than that nothing too major
Still very tired and groggy and having vivid dreams every so often. I hope the sub starts tapping into my body fat for energy because it seems I putting on a little too much weight now
I've recently become fed up of running version A for some reason and have since switched to version b.
For results I suppose I'm getting them but I'm not pursuing the openings that I see due to the fact that I'm seeing someone right now.
For specific results I have a few girls who I find really attractive have added me on Snapchat and she sends flirty pics and she is basically setting the stage just waiting for me to ask her out. I know we're running a sub which is supposed to make us irresistible and make them do all the work, but I feel like even this much is incredible. Just recognizing the opportunity and knowing it's there and how to proceed is an amazing improvement from how I once was.
My girlfriend basically never turns me away for sex and unless she's on her period I can have her wherever and whenever I want.
My ex has been liking my pictures on Instagram and has started following me again. She hasnt tried to contact me yet, but I feel t's coming soon. Lol
In terms of my personal sub goals I don't think I really want to be "irresistibly sexy" anymore. I'm looking for financial freedom and optimism for life. I want to have a positive outlook on life and lose this heavy feeling in my chest.
But I'll still continue to run DMSI. Will probably switch to the healing version again when 3.1 comes out but it just makes me so tired and foggy
I just thought I'd write a little about this heavy feeling that I get. I first experienced it when I was heartbroken for the very first time. I was devastated and basically forced myself to give up all hope that I would ever have her and the life I wanted. As I grew older and got hurt a little more I found the manosphere or red pill as some like to call it and It just made me very cynical and pessimistic towards women and life in general. Ever since my first heartbreak I've carried some of this heavy feeling with me and the only time it reduces or goes away is when I immerse myself in memories of the past before the heartbreak happened. If anything reminds me of those times when I was happy I can feel the weight lift for a moment and when I become too conscious of the feeling it goes back to how it was.
I'm not sure if the heavy feeling is there 24/7 but if it is its something I've just become used to
I'd be eternally grateful if a sub could make this feeling go away