(10-11-2016, 12:58 PM)Big Boss Wrote: [ -> ]Hey Kol just wanted to say I salute you for going on a second run through takes balls to handle a tough journey which I so very well understand
Thanks bro, much appreciated.
(10-11-2016, 04:31 PM)blackwing Z Wrote: [ -> ]So do you still hang out with your friends? Or are u slowly distancing yourself?
I have been noticing my friends are becoming more alpha too it seems.. Hopefully they grow with me. That would be pretty cool. Otherwise, what the **** is the value in friendship and close bonds...
Distancing and seeing some social inept skills, like totally off not making sense kind of social skills and oblivious to social cues in one of them, which I knew before but now gets pronounced and ticks me off. reading subtlities in peoples behaviour. I notice aswell one of the guys in the social circle acts different, if there was some sort of fight over rank or some sorts. The tension is real. I will outgrow it eventually, its natures law in this.
So its a bit of both depending on my state.
day 32
Stage 1 finished
recap:
more centred, less reactionair today, feeling morem decisive, decision in to who to react because of the abundance nowadays. Attitude definitely shifted aswell. Feeling very alpha and powerfull as a conclusion.
Satge 2 1 hour:
validation seeking destroyed, going my own way and path carved strongerly out. very cocky, arrogant and confident, pretty much ecstatic and very much upgrade of stage 1. forcefull presence and life is good. Out of this world. Feel like blazing everything aorund me away like glass shattering,. lets see what this stage and the upcoming days will bring. Alpha feelings keep going on aswell. Feeling increasingly horny and sexual. Awesome. No need to get philosophic about that.
My body oozes strength, power and force. Intensly so.
(10-10-2016, 01:19 AM)Kol Wrote: [ -> ]day 30
2 days till stage 2 and life is good even tho I'm hit with the flu. went to the store and notice how socially fluid im becoming and am. Natural flow with it with hints of playfullness for the heck of it. It just comes out. Noticed some behaviour in traffic with some guys overtly blatantly signing through gestures and stuff. Whatever that means I dont know, felt like I had a celebrity vibe but I remained unfazed intensly.
Weird... I got hit with the flue at the exact same time...
stage 2 day 5
Not feel like journalling nowadays. Something is set into gear. can't wait for stage 3 and setting this sub in full gear.
Found a strongh interest in learning russian. Mindset does sometimes slip in this hitman stage and pure raw agression in presence, which catches me offguard. I feel incredibly animated and life is very good.
Am getting pretty fearless yet at peace in ways. Provocation doesnt do a thing anymore and being forward is met with force and strength in presence and nature. Makes me wonder about empathy, neediness and caring in general as it can be pretty void feeling wise as to how some states can be. Relentless. Also maculinity enhances further aswell as singularity in intent.
Other stuff is a matter of acceptation of new reality that is pretty obvious. Getting my edge back but also more closed pretty extreme.
day 9
went to get a new haircut. I swear the girl I had a crush on before some years ago had a deeper breathing when she went about it. interest and such, smiles and very responsive, eye contact and interacting with the environment. wonder how she would react on pheromones. No fear. very comfortable in public when getting something to eat. talking with some other people and some guy did respond when I finished pretty enthousiastic. Im starting to feel my actual high status and pretty much solidity about this.
No longer seems to, just direct acceptation.
having feelings of being a beast, alpha and badboy. Some guy at the gym seemed to try to amog me but I was just checking in and went on with it, simple multiple engagement without effort, as if it didnt register. pretty strong shield mechanism or something while yet being real.
Time to go full sexual.
Radical inner changes happening. Attraction based on polarisation bad boy tendencies. Very much fine with that. Nice guy doesn't cut it. Asshole game does with non caring attitude. Being the high value guy. I would say badside Damon Salvator kind of personality. Being attracted is not a choice. Have heard and seen it before. Emotional spiking. Feeling alive. Some whole new gaming field has been opened. Very confident and care level is pretty much 0.
I just read a bit about amogs. Probably the first link when searching in Google. From the past 5 months AM I feel light years from even having those conversations. You did the right thing in that scenario I think
Yeah, it my nature as of late, autopilot plays a role aswell as my non caring attitude. I didnt even acknowledge it only to realize after the fact.
You make me want to run AM6 again.
Yeah to be as ascendant/ transcendent as possible we gotta pretty much forget everything we've been "told" about being alpha
day 11
gotta love the submissive eyes of girls when the look down but upward like "daddy"
feeling more and more uninhibited. guys seem to be intimidates and ignore me.
day 15
Life is good. my bodylanguage says "im not your friend"when interacting with women, its rather sexual, alpha and congrugent, second run is definitely a good choice being made.
Checked out from the gym, and the women 7/10 subconsciously judging was almost slipping from her chair, eye contact, interacting in a sexual manner with her. 0 fucks given.
Also suspect some other women at the gym are eye fucking me.
I see manifestations everywhere all around.
Saw the guy who tried to amog me last time yesterday and he was rather supplicating. Could be friend manifestation going on, he's a professional boxer and a pretty chill dude.
ps; feeling naked without a beard.
day 16
Met up with some people up yetserday and one of them seems to to be seriously treatened by my vibe, causing him to compensate and going stronger Amogging, as if he is desperate to keep his place in the pecking order. Its all subconscious but the passive agressiveness that came from him was off putting to me. There is a agression response under the hood, Im really no longer am going to put up with this stuff. i can ignore it and redirect my attention for whats more benefitting for me, whats making my life better instead of reliance in an way to have the circumstances being okay.
One part of me is about calling him out on it, the other part of me is already indifferent and moving.
Others in my circle are picking this behaviour up aswell, like, its some darker behaviour he is displaying which is noticable. maybe, because of some tragedy in his life or something that made him tumble the edge, and thus processing it.
Changing dramatically as of late, like, serious reality bending shifting and evolving.