Subliminal Talk

That is what i thought but wasn't sure that girl tells me im nice or the nicest guy around and i told her not to confuse my charm with nice

I only believed a small part of charm could contribute to being nice. I know my charm is working good when the secretary at work was offering to do things for me like get my paperwork, highlight things i was going to and her offering to do it and offering to bring them out to me.

I was trying to find a answer that filled my curiosity or killed it and Ryan i think you gave me the best i could have ever asked for. Thank you

The best way I have found to kill the nice guy factor is to have a little dangerousness thrown in. I have learned how to express that with glances, words and actions. But there isn't much that says to a woman "I am not Mister Nice Guy" than a gaze that tells her "You are the unquestionable subject of my sexual interest and desire" .

Naturally, that must be balanced, as leering at women is not how to get anywhere either, unless she's drunk and horny, and you'll probably regret that later for one reason or another.

You have to communicate to her that you are the hunter and she is the hunted, and you are interested. But don't make her feel "stalked" in the negative sense of the word. Believe it or not, you can make a woman feel "stalked" in a positive way. In a situation where you are the hunter and you are stalking her as your sexual prey, and you do it right - she'll be drawn to you like a moth to a flame. That obviousness of intent, coupled with complete lack of apology for it, mixed with obvious self control and pre-meditation, as well as a suitably appropriate conversation which expresses these things while demonstrating that you do have self control, that you are the skilled, smooth and experienced man who knows what he's doing and has every intention of getting who and what he wants, without being creepy, pushy, or overly threatening... women just can't resist that - when it is properly executed.

Of course, that's not much help if you're not experienced, but it will hopefully give you some idea what to aim for as you gain experience. I have found that it requires a certain type of woman and a certain degree of initial comfort in most cases, but if you get good at eye seduction, I have seen it happen that a woman can be seduced thusly across a bar without any words at all.

Harmless guys go in the friend zone. Nice guys are harmless. Charmers are nice guys unless they are adding in a little bit of sexual intent. This makes them a slight threat, and that makes them exciting, without being too threatening. She usually needs a very fine line, but once you figure out how to achieve that fine line, it'll quickly become second nature to seduce women with it.

I would agree with the above ^^ but building off of that. Just go for what you want, like I mentioned before. Being direct and true to your intentions if what you seek. You can be a nice guy but remember a nice guy also hides his intentions. A nice guy is a pleaser, not a doer. Be a go-getter. What you want is just a little edge. A little something to point out that, hey I'm a nice guy, I'll respect you, but when you least expect it I'm going to throw you on our restaurant table and f- your brains out!

Ryan

nice, Shannon i think alpha male and the flirt sub help me be exactly how you describe it in your paragraph. that is how i have been handling a few women. notably the girl i told her i liked.

I wouldn't say im there though. I will for sure not worry to much about it or how sex magnet will affect me but just let it do its thing and see what changes.

I will say that i have had issues with women calling me nice and everything. After alpha im not the "nice guy" Granted i am nice but if someone dose something i don't like or tries to put me down or use me. They better watch out i don't take that Sh** sitting down. I even call people out in there bs all the time and stand my ground when they retaliate.

The one girl i told her i liked her. She tells me im nice or im the nicest guy she knows. the thing is I don't treat her any different then anyone else, except the heavy/light flirting we had/have going on. I call her out on her BS, set boundaries, let her know directly if she makes me mad (which for anyone dose not happen much anymore.) I tease her, call her names (good ones), and im challenging her with mixing in straight answers. honestly she could think of me as a "friend zone nice guy" but i don't think she dose. My intuition is deadly accurate on women i just don't pull the trigger when i should.

(06-26-2011, 02:57 PM)Ryan Wrote: [ -> ]I would agree with the above ^^ but building off of that. Just go for what you want, like I mentioned before. Being direct and true to your intentions if what you seek. You can be a nice guy but remember a nice guy also hides his intentions. A nice guy is a pleaser, not a doer. Be a go-getter. What you want is just a little edge. A little something to point out that, hey I'm a nice guy, I'll respect you, but when you least expect it I'm going to throw you on our restaurant table and f- your brains out!

Ryan

i haven't hid my intentions, least not that i am aware of. I just wasn't sure if being charming was a great thing to have. I honestly don't think im to nice or even pleasing. How i am perceived and people interpret my charm i guess is a another story.

I thought this was an interesting read...can't really find many gurus out there that teach you to become a charmer...

http://www.slideshare.net/abhishek_singh...rm-a-woman

Get to watching some serious Nip/Tuck and use Christian Troy as your role model, if you want to discard the idea of "nice guy".

Check it out. That AND that.

well my mind is at ease, this may be another form of resistance? not sure tho but I am not as worried anymore. Thank you once again to Shannon, Ryan, and Cortez you guys helped eased my mind on charm and "nice guy"

hahaha Cortez, that is awesome! I'm going to get that show now! I seen a episode years ago but didn't really pay much attention at the time.

Another one is Tommy Gavin from Rescue Me, he is always banging somebody new and you could tell a guy like that would be in real life. Good show. He just doesn't give a f^&k, here is some examples.





This may offend somebody, but it shows how honestly he expresses himself and doesn't follow the group, in fact they follow him after he says it.



-Ben

I love Dennis Leary. I never really gave "Rescue me" much of a shot, though. That's good stuff. I think I'll watch that after I'm done with Nip/Tuck. They have all six seasons of Nip/Tuck streaming on Netflix. I imagine Rescue me is on there too.

That is some good stuff Ben Rescue me, nip tuck and californication i would say are good shows for what a man is. Sure they all have there own problems but they also are not the nice guy.

I am sure, that this whole "nice guy", charmer, and any other questions or concerns i had over the weekend where a form of resistance. I felt like after all the work i had done over the years on bettering my self and being the best me i can be with alpha male traits. i felt like none of it stuck and that i was still just a "nice guy".

Well the roller coaster moves up and down and i feel on an upwards slope now. even tho i felt like i had a weird energy today.

Well, maybe you can still be the nice guy but when not giving a $%#@ it gives you that manly edge to balance you out. So if you like being nice and friendly that's totally cool. Just don't do stuff to please people. Only do things to please yourself.

I personally could never see myself as hank moody or the dudes from Nip Tuck and Rescue Me. I'm better than that. I'm sure you are too, Tony.

Been watching Nip Tuck. Christian is awesome with how he deals with women.

Some of them pull some crazy shit that would blow me out and do my head in. He just doesn't care.

Like one woman was trying to tell him she didn't have an orgasm to make him feel bad. And he comes up really close and says with strong belief "bullshit, you had 3, I counted them" and just looks into her eyes.

She is like "lock the door" (they are at work) and they have sex in the staff room.

Awesome. Definately alot of strong self belief there.

There's so many great Christian scenes in that show.