Took some st.Johns wort today and I have to say that it really calmed me down a lot. Not that I'm normally super anxious but I was just really really relaxed and mellow. Even when I was doing things I wasn't comfortable with I just kept breathing normally and took my time. I'm really satisfied with the effects of it. I think I'll be taking it regularly maybe just at half the recommended dosage which is one pill 3 times a day. I'll stick with 1-2
I'm sure the effects are from the pill and not the sub since it's only been one day
AM6 is real special man. I wish you an amazing journey on it.
I had a lot of crazy dreams last night, first one I was at a clothing store and there was a massive sale and I saw a lot of people that I know but haven't seen in a long time. I remember running around the store looking for things that I liked.
Second dream I was in another clothing store but this was a women's store, then I saw a women in a sexy little black dress. I just grabbed her hand and took her to one of the changing rooms and started having sex with her. She was already so wet in the dream. We were so into it that we didn't notice there was already someone in the room when we came in.
My thirds dream I was in my old house in my old bed and my family was just living happily. I was watching TV but porn kept showing up on TV and I kept rushing to change the channel because my parents were around.
My fourth dream my family wanted to buy back my old house. We were looking around the house and being amazed that this new family kept it exactly as we had it. We were going to put an offer in for the house. And I remember thinking that I would be able to live in this house on my own since my family was still keeping our new house. I was thinking of being able to bringing girls back and have sex with them
Side note I'm not sure if it's because of too much am6 or the st Johns wort but yesterday I was really tired.
Midway through stage 1:
Today I went to religious function held by one of my family members and this would be the first time seeing them after 2 years or so for most of them.
I had no anxiety around them regarding losing my hair which I used to have anxiety about. Once I started shaving my head clean I really started to accept that I'm bald and so what.
Also there was a girl who I found a little attractive , she was the pastors daughter and she was helping him perform the function. After the function my cousin was chatting with the girl and I sort of felt like I was losing my chance because my cousin is really alpha. Then he left and I started to talk to her and I started feeling anxiety when I ran out of things to say. So I just walked away and left her.
Later on my cousin told me he left because he thought I was gonna ask her number .then I started beating myself up a little, thinking of excuses why I didn't do it. I thought she looked a little young but it turns out according to my cousin she's only 2 years younger than myself. I would have found that out if I had the confidence to ask.
What I really learned today was that I have little to no game when it comes to women in random situations.
If it's a situation that automatically brings us together like work or school then I can use that to build attraction. But situations where I just walk up to a girl and start talking I just can't do it. I feel so much pressure.
I went to the grocery store with my cousin and he just randomly started a conversation with the cashier and I'm just watching wishing it could be this easy for me
I really need to up my game, start approaching random women and getting out of my damn comfort zone. I'm tired of this overly strong fight or flight response controlling me
Sub progress wise, I'm not sure if I really feel any different. I think I feel less anxiety in most situations. Heck I'm surprised I even spoke to the girl at all, so thats an improvement for me. Also I react less to other peoples emotions and problems. I feel a little cold and uncaring,
This kind of shit makes me impatient while running subs. I want to hurry up am6 so I can get to Wm or sm. But i know 6 cant be rushed.
I want to be able to feel no anxiety and be comfortable with talking to women. Currently I can only do that when I have no attraction towards the woman. If there's any attraction involved I always feel anxiety.
Hopefully I can afford sm or wm when the time comes.
I'm at a point in life where I'm unsatisfied with everything.
I don't have any purpose in life and I feel a void in myself. I don't feel fulfilled by the life that I'm living. For the most of my life I believed that having a woman in my life would fulfill me. That love was the purpose of life, and that loving a woman would satisfy me in life.
How wrong I was. Through something known as the red pill I have come to understand the true nature of women. This has caused everything my life was built on to be shaken and destroyed.
My whole life I believed that something was the greatest that it was the only thing worth living for, then all of a sudden I find out its a farce. Not a complete farce but the extent that I had believed it to be was not true. A Womens love for a man is fickle and weak. There is no woman who will stand by you through all your ups and downs if there is another man trying to get her attention.
I have come to accept that I will never have the life I envisioned for myself when I was younger. Although I accept it , it still hurts.
Now I'm left here trying to find a purpose or meaning for my life. I don't want to need a woman to be happy. I dont want to need a woman to feel fulfilled in life.
I know that many of us are here specifically because of women. But why is it like that in the first place. We've all been brainwashed to worship women. But we've been biologically programmed to want them so there's no avoiding that.
I don't know what to do with my life. I just want to be fulfilled in the end.
I went through the same thing when I discovered that women's love is fickle and conditional, first through experiences and hammered into truth through blogs and books. And yes, it is hard to accept it right away. I, myself, worshipped women like they are some Goddesses from heavens. Like you, I also envisioned my perfect life with a perfect girl. It is a sad state of affairs how we are brainwashed from childhood through songs (I can't stand half of the songs I listen to just because of it), movies, books! The list goes on.
A state of total unsatisfaction is a positive thing in many ways, it pushes you off to seek new paths, you will discover much more about yourself and the world around you. Keep going, you are surely in for one life-changing ride.
I think we've all been there. I intellectually came to the conclusion that no woman will ever fulfill me a few years ago but I didn't really internalize it until I did my AM6 run. After that I could instinctively just sense in the media I looked at (music, movies, books) and see how men are indoctrinated into this whole thing of worshiping women and becoming needy towards them (Which turns them off big time). I remember how I use to get depressed when I would see my friends on Facebook get a girlfriend/married but now I see how they make those women their entire existence and use all kinds of needy language to describe their relationship. It automatically makes me cringe now to see that.
Now it does suck to realize that what you've been told your entire life was a lie but at the same time you could see it as a opportunity. A opportunity to change things now so you can move your life forward with the right information. The point being that a woman should be a accessory to a man's life but never the main focus to it. Also, if you want any woman who will be a accessory to your life but not the focus your going to need to be a alpha. I've realized that most of the relationship advice you get nowadays is very dated. You might have gotten away with being beta back in the 19th and early 20th century but not now. Back then women had economic incentives (men had more economic opportunities so that automatically raised their value) to have a man in their lives and social reasons (divorce was stigmatized) to stay with a man. That is no longer the case today. So, you have no choice to but to become a Alpha if you want have any women in your life without becoming needy about it.
Of course betas still get women but they usually end up getting used (both in the dating phase and in the marriage phase, if they reach that point) and are then promptly thrown to the curb. That is the new type of reality we live in.
P.S. Found it interesting that we are having this discussion when I just read this article a few days ago.
Beta Male. I don't usually read return of kings but I found this article entertaining.
Appreciate the support guys,
Last night I had one of the worst nights sleep of my life. I had multiple bad dreams ranging from seeing my ex with a new guy, completely and utterly failing at my job and losing all of my equipment , fighting with my brother whom I never got along with, and lastly this dream I wasn't in but I was watching it like a TV show it was an school set up with traps and rooms like a concentration camp or asylum
I'm pretty depressed today, just a low energy , low mood kind of day. And to top it off its getting cold now and it's raining.
I just remembered something from school on friday. My professor was lecturing about advertising and the topic of subliminal ads came up. He pretty much said that there have not been any studies to prove that subliminals actually work and completely disregarded their effectiveness.
I just sat back and smiled while listening to am6 ultrasonic through my cellphone speaker.
Let closed minds remain closed, more advantage for me.
(07-12-2015, 09:29 PM)Superman Wrote: [ -> ]Still running the sub. But now running in combination with aypsl. Ultra sonic at night in a playlist running each sub 3 times before going to the next.
So far I'm still feeling cockyness and confident. Sex drive is way up. Just walking around the mall I couldn't stop the erection from pitching a tent up in my pants. Not really noticing too much attention yet from others though. It's possible I'm not recognizing the subtle interest,but there hasn't been any 100% obvious manifestations yet.
I've been going to the mall a lot more lately, haven't been approaching anyone but I've just been admiring the beauty around me and realizing that beautiful women are a common thing, they're not that special or rare. More girls turn 18 every day, and more being born all the time.
Although while I was walking in the mall I walked passed a short woman with a petite body and nice booty , just my type. After I passed her she passed me back and just kept walking directly in front of me about 4 feet ahead of me and I couldn't stop this erection if my life depended on it. I think people were noticing the tent in my pants as I walked behind this woman, I started digging my nails in my hand to try to stop it. She was turning to look in the stores as she was walking but glanced back at me a few times while she did that. Her body was nice but when I got a good look at her face it wasn't as good as I expected. Not bad, just not matching the body.
In general I feel most of the changes have been internal, changing my opinion of my own attractiveness and desirability. Which in turn is making me more confident, removing women from the pedestal and wiring it into my brain that all women are attracted to me and I deserve their attractions.
Oh and I keep forgetting to write this, since I started using biatbws I've been driving like a racecar driver. Driving fast, doing dangerous maneuvers, going fast through turns, power sliding whenever I can.
I think I'm growing tired of my friends, possibly a late manifestation from am6 or it could be something biatbws or aypsl is pushing me to do.
Damn, I wish I could get an erection that wouldn't go away while I walked through the mall lol. I think i watch too much porn or maybe I just need to go to the gym everyday because that would be awesome, I'd go to the mall literally everyday if walking behind hotties gave me a raging hard on that wouldn't go away. You're a lucky man! I really need to get healthy because soon my di*k will be useless and that's a scary thought.
(09-20-2015, 02:56 PM)TheRealJustin Wrote: [ -> ]='
Damn, I wish I could get an erection that wouldn't go away while I walked through the mall lol. I think i watch too much porn or maybe I just need to go to the gym everyday because that would be awesome, I'd go to the mall literally everyday if walking behind hotties gave me a raging hard on that wouldn't go away. You're a lucky man! I really need to get healthy because soon my di*k will be useless and that's a scary thought.
You probably do watch too much porn. If I don't watch porn or masturbate for 2 weeks or more every little thing a woman does turns me on. Since starting am6 I went 3 weeks without masturbating or porn, but I had a little relapse this past week. My goal is to go at least 90 days without porn or masturbating to help rewire my dopamine receptors
NSFM update:
I bought NSFM to use before heading to the club for the first time for a friend's birthday. I used it approximately for 3 hours before heading to my friends place. I listened to the trickling stream through headphones.
What I noticed is that I felt really calm. This is the first time going to a club and I always felt some sort of aversion to these types of places. But while getting ready and heading out I felt no anxiety.
My friends and I had a couple of drinks and we headed to the club. While at the club I still felt this sense of calm but I was so calm that while everyone was partying I was just chilling. Everyone's energy level was way higher than mine. My energy was more relaxed and in control
Maybe this sub isn't suited to club use. Or maybe like it says in the description that it puts all of my knowledge to work and allows my own style of seduction to work and let's my brain get out of its own way
I've read and understand a lot of pick up concepts and
I always felt that my own style of seduction was through continuous interaction and teasing in normal everyday environments. I'm not a club/party guy so that's probably why it didn't work.
Oh well I'll try it again next week at my other friends party :p
Am6 Stage 2 update :
Been running stage 2 a few days now, notice a lot of sex related dreams, nothing else so far