Subliminal Talk

Perfectionism finding itself in my life again. I realized I was putting too much emphasis on getting good with my music and being too afraid to screw up or not be good enough. And I told myself, well you can either keep being afraid of mistakes and failures and turn music into this horrible thing or you can just drop it all and accept that you may never be as good as you set out to be, but you can at least enjoy it. That's the trap of perfectionism, I think that it's a good thing, that one day I'll be happy with my work. For a long time I saw perfectionism in a positive light, I said well at least I'm good at focusing and improving my craft. But it was all just rationalizing, perfectionism is 100% bad. It staggers my growth and ruins my ability to learn from failures. I can be highly focused and dedicated to improving my craft without perfectionism. I've just got a case of Stockholm syndrome when it comes to perfectionism, I have trouble letting it go because my mind still thinks it gives me some kind of "edge".

Perfectionism is always based in the fear that you're not good enough and black and white thinking. I would say more, but it's high time I went to bed.

(07-31-2013, 10:26 PM)Shannon Wrote: [ -> ]Perfectionism is always based in the fear that you're not good enough and black and white thinking. I would say more, but it's high time I went to bed.

Again with the fear, this is also a recurring theme in my life. So it's entirely possible I don't have the belief that I'm not good enough, but I just fear that I could not be good enough? Everything I've read on perfectionism always pointed towards self esteem issues. My biggest issue is if I look hard enough I can find all sorts of issues that may not even be there. These days I really have relaxed on my self reflections, I found that more often than not my obsessive inward thinking was just due to the fear and the more I thought about things the worse I got. I still feel like my mind is chaotic even without thinking of these things.

Yes, feeling adequate and secure in oneself. It's insecurity that feeds perfectionism.

(08-01-2013, 06:14 PM)Shannon Wrote: [ -> ]Yes, feeling adequate and secure in oneself. It's insecurity that feeds perfectionism.

Well this has enlightened me. On a side note. I've bought a couple of subs from the sale. I got improve eyesight, everything is possible, and learn any musical instrument faster. I'm thinking about starting the improve eyesight one. I know I can run this with alpha. The question is, will it tire me out a lot? Alpha is already pretty rough, I've never really ran any type C subs so I have no idea what to expect.

You cannot use it with Alpha, because it is a Type C and Alpha is a Type B/C/D hybrid.

(08-01-2013, 08:01 PM)Shannon Wrote: [ -> ]You cannot use it with Alpha, because it is a Type C and Alpha is a Type B/C/D hybrid.

Ok thanks. I thought alpha was just a type B. Good to know.

Just thought I'd reflect on something brief. I feel like people are giving me more respect. What's interesting is I think what people see and what I see are two completely separate things. It's like despite how I consciously feel, my subconscious is projecting a certain image that others are picking up on. Which is cool.

Also I'm gonna be going for a blood test soon for gluten sensitivity. Regardless of what shows up I'm going to cut it out of my diet. I can't say gluten is the source of all my problems, but it certainly doesn't help. Maybe once I address this I can get a better gauge on what's my beliefs vs a physical problem. I've noticed after ingesting gluten I get brain fog, basically it feels like my brain slows down, things become harder to process. I think the fact that I can't think clearly is what contributes to the anxiety. And of course, the depression that comes on slowly.

Now a lot of research still doesn't understand gluten intolerance. The idea is to just cut out gluten. But I'm wondering if you could use the subconscious to overcome it. After all it's just the body's immune system response to seeing gluten as a threat and attacking.

(08-03-2013, 08:03 AM)mat422 Wrote: [ -> ]Just thought I'd reflect on something brief. I feel like people are giving me more respect. What's interesting is I think what people see and what I see are two completely separate things. It's like despite how I consciously feel, my subconscious is projecting a certain image that others are picking up on. Which is cool.

By far one of my favorite parts of these subs.

(08-03-2013, 08:03 AM)mat422 Wrote: [ -> ]Also I'm gonna be going for a blood test soon for gluten sensitivity. Regardless of what shows up I'm going to cut it out of my diet. I can't say gluten is the source of all my problems, but it certainly doesn't help. Maybe once I address this I can get a better gauge on what's my beliefs vs a physical problem. I've noticed after ingesting gluten I get brain fog, basically it feels like my brain slows down, things become harder to process. I think the fact that I can't think clearly is what contributes to the anxiety. And of course, the depression that comes on slowly.

Now a lot of research still doesn't understand gluten intolerance. The idea is to just cut out gluten. But I'm wondering if you could use the subconscious to overcome it. After all it's just the body's immune system response to seeing gluten as a threat and attacking.

I have this too. I cut wheat/grains and dairy products completely from my diet a year ago. Every time I have any wheat or dairy now, a definite sluggish change comes over my mind and body, so I'm glad you've decided to go gluten free. I'd recommend no grains and no dairy either though. At least try it for a month. It's what my trainer recommended a year ago, and after a month I tried some bread and wham! like a ton of bricks I was back under the fog.

(08-03-2013, 07:10 PM)SargeMaximus Wrote: [ -> ]I have this too. I cut wheat/grains and dairy products completely from my diet a year ago. Every time I have any wheat or dairy now, a definite sluggish change comes over my mind and body, so I'm glad you've decided to go gluten free. I'd recommend no grains and no dairy either though. At least try it for a month. It's what my trainer recommended a year ago, and after a month I tried some bread and wham! like a ton of bricks I was back under the fog.

I think I'm ok with dairy. I'll have to go on an elimination diet to find out for sure. But no grains at all? What do you usually eat? No grains at all is a little overboard for me.

(08-04-2013, 08:43 AM)mat422 Wrote: [ -> ]I think I'm ok with dairy. I'll have to go on an elimination diet to find out for sure. But no grains at all? What do you usually eat? No grains at all is a little overboard for me.

I eat beef, almonds, oats (are those a grain? if so, then there's one), potato salad and tortilla chips usually.

My diet is stacked enough to allow for the junk food as the non-processed/pure foods make up 80% of it. It's hard because I'm on a 6,000 calorie diet but rarely hit that goal. More like 5,600. Anyways, elimination diet sounds like a great idea.

(08-04-2013, 11:00 AM)SargeMaximus Wrote: [ -> ]

(08-04-2013, 08:43 AM)mat422 Wrote: [ -> ]I think I'm ok with dairy. I'll have to go on an elimination diet to find out for sure. But no grains at all? What do you usually eat? No grains at all is a little overboard for me.

I eat beef, almonds, oats (are those a grain? if so, then there's one), potato salad and tortilla chips usually.

My diet is stacked enough to allow for the junk food as the non-processed/pure foods make up 80% of it. It's hard because I'm on a 6,000 calorie diet but rarely hit that goal. More like 5,600. Anyways, elimination diet sounds like a great idea.

Yeah man, oats are grains. What about vegetables? I'd probably get tired of a diet like that. As much as I love potato salad, I need variety in my meals.

(08-04-2013, 01:52 PM)mat422 Wrote: [ -> ]Yeah man, oats are grains. What about vegetables? I'd probably get tired of a diet like that. As much as I love potato salad, I need variety in my meals.

No veggies, no fruit. I get all my vitamins from a multivitamin. Also, I don't like eating at all, strange as I know that sounds, but it's true. I'd rather not to be honest with you. So I go for the most efficient and healthy diet I can. Plus, veggies don't really give you any calories, which is what I need.

(08-04-2013, 11:00 AM)SargeMaximus Wrote: [ -> ]

(08-04-2013, 08:43 AM)mat422 Wrote: [ -> ]I think I'm ok with dairy. I'll have to go on an elimination diet to find out for sure. But no grains at all? What do you usually eat? No grains at all is a little overboard for me.

I eat beef, almonds, oats (are those a grain? if so, then there's one), potato salad and tortilla chips usually.

My diet is stacked enough to allow for the junk food as the non-processed/pure foods make up 80% of it. It's hard because I'm on a 6,000 calorie diet but rarely hit that goal. More like 5,600. Anyways, elimination diet sounds like a great idea.

Oats are a grain. Corn is also. Tortilla chips are made from corn. You eat grains, my friend.