Ok, so I have learned a lot about myself in the past 2 years using Shannon's subs. Where I was 2 years ago and where I am now is a huge difference.
Since starting, I have become more comfortable in my own skin. I do not have anxiety when talking to women, when in the moment such as at a party, and I can start talking without problem because that's what is expected at a party.
That being said, if I get a phone number, I still get that nervous feeling when calling and still am a little uptight when we meet, like I can't loosen up or anything. This was just evident the last time it happened, not sure, i was just nervous or something. It took me a drink to loosen up and relax and have fun, I know I'm that type of person but when I was hanging out with her I was just nervous or something.
Anyway, other things that I still haven't changed about myself...
I still use pornography, as indicated by the topic title. But addiction is a strong word, in a clinical sense anyway, and I could not say if I was addicted to it. Does it "ruin" my life? not necessarily. It's easy for me to blame my lack of being more social on pornography, that using pornography makes me lazy because once I get to the point of orgasm, I no longer feel the desire to go out and meet women, and then choose to stay home and play video games.
That's not true though, I've stopped pornography use before for periods of time from 1 week to 2 months, and i still fall into the same habit of playing video games, but I also have a history of recreational marijuana use, which also contributes to that being antisocial i'm sure.
So maybe what I need is to use overcome is marijuana use? I don't like to give this up, i usually tell myself it's for a break. I really think sex while you're high is amazing, granted I don't have sex that often possibly because of my recreational drug and pornography use.
I've never really come to terms or have mentioned this to anyone, internet or in person. It's something that I really enjoy, but it isn't harmful to me, or maybe I'm telling myself that. I have other goals that I want to achieve and sometimes I find myself thinking at the end of the day after I've gotten high and masturbated, that I want to achieve my goals the next day but end up in the same old cycle. I've watched some videos on "pornography addiction" and how it's novel stimulation I want, because it's so readily available in the internet via porn/video games. The drugs make it so that I feel OK when I am bored.
Just a little bit more info, I started drug/porno use heavily during 1st yr college since I had a single room. So that's when I was 18, up until 22 when I decided to delete my porn on my computer... and since then I've been on and off (mostly on, going to be honest here) but using streaming. I'm 24 now. the drug use has slowed down and has become more of a social habit, but once in a while i get a little for myself.
After typing this all out, it doesn't really seem like a post about whether or not this product is right for me but rather I want to see what all of you have to say on my self reflection and what might be the best course of action for me.
Last side note edit: I started subs when I was 21 and a halfish, used am2012, wm1.0 for 40 days each stage, am5.0, and in wm2.0 stage 5 right now. After that I wanted to run wm2.0 again.. but with sm3.0 around the corner... but before I did those I was wondering if i should run overcome porn or marijuana addictions
Since starting, I have become more comfortable in my own skin. I do not have anxiety when talking to women, when in the moment such as at a party, and I can start talking without problem because that's what is expected at a party.
That being said, if I get a phone number, I still get that nervous feeling when calling and still am a little uptight when we meet, like I can't loosen up or anything. This was just evident the last time it happened, not sure, i was just nervous or something. It took me a drink to loosen up and relax and have fun, I know I'm that type of person but when I was hanging out with her I was just nervous or something.
Anyway, other things that I still haven't changed about myself...
I still use pornography, as indicated by the topic title. But addiction is a strong word, in a clinical sense anyway, and I could not say if I was addicted to it. Does it "ruin" my life? not necessarily. It's easy for me to blame my lack of being more social on pornography, that using pornography makes me lazy because once I get to the point of orgasm, I no longer feel the desire to go out and meet women, and then choose to stay home and play video games.
That's not true though, I've stopped pornography use before for periods of time from 1 week to 2 months, and i still fall into the same habit of playing video games, but I also have a history of recreational marijuana use, which also contributes to that being antisocial i'm sure.
So maybe what I need is to use overcome is marijuana use? I don't like to give this up, i usually tell myself it's for a break. I really think sex while you're high is amazing, granted I don't have sex that often possibly because of my recreational drug and pornography use.
I've never really come to terms or have mentioned this to anyone, internet or in person. It's something that I really enjoy, but it isn't harmful to me, or maybe I'm telling myself that. I have other goals that I want to achieve and sometimes I find myself thinking at the end of the day after I've gotten high and masturbated, that I want to achieve my goals the next day but end up in the same old cycle. I've watched some videos on "pornography addiction" and how it's novel stimulation I want, because it's so readily available in the internet via porn/video games. The drugs make it so that I feel OK when I am bored.
Just a little bit more info, I started drug/porno use heavily during 1st yr college since I had a single room. So that's when I was 18, up until 22 when I decided to delete my porn on my computer... and since then I've been on and off (mostly on, going to be honest here) but using streaming. I'm 24 now. the drug use has slowed down and has become more of a social habit, but once in a while i get a little for myself.
After typing this all out, it doesn't really seem like a post about whether or not this product is right for me but rather I want to see what all of you have to say on my self reflection and what might be the best course of action for me.
Last side note edit: I started subs when I was 21 and a halfish, used am2012, wm1.0 for 40 days each stage, am5.0, and in wm2.0 stage 5 right now. After that I wanted to run wm2.0 again.. but with sm3.0 around the corner... but before I did those I was wondering if i should run overcome porn or marijuana addictions
