10-15-2018, 11:29 AM
(This post was last modified: 10-15-2018, 11:31 AM by Have at ye.)
OK, last night's listening was not exactly easy, as some fears I was already aware of started coming up experientially, child-thinking level survival-based fears, but I noticed that I was a) fighting them logically [EDIT: and sometimes... not quite logically. F. in. had this thought "but I will die if I do this", to which I immediately responded "then I will die. On my own terms", and such stuff, lol], b) attempting to dissolve them. A funny thing is that I had this image of my kid-self punching this atrocious old dingbat that was my piano teacher from ages 6 to 11 - boy, but did she ever deserve this. 
Afterwards, some weird stuff started happening. I had this sensation as if some sort of dark tendrils were trying to infiltrate my brain. Caught them and fired right back in a manner I've been employing lately. Took some time, but in the end, I think it worked. Got wonky physical sensations while I was at it. Finally managed to fall asleep, and had a very productive day today despite not enough sleep for the amount of stuff I had to do today. Bardic skillz are leveling up.
Good thing I've got this week at least to do 'em loops in the comfort of my own home with no bystanders, so to speak.
Afterwards, some weird stuff started happening. I had this sensation as if some sort of dark tendrils were trying to infiltrate my brain. Caught them and fired right back in a manner I've been employing lately. Took some time, but in the end, I think it worked. Got wonky physical sensations while I was at it. Finally managed to fall asleep, and had a very productive day today despite not enough sleep for the amount of stuff I had to do today. Bardic skillz are leveling up.
Good thing I've got this week at least to do 'em loops in the comfort of my own home with no bystanders, so to speak.
"A man who is doing his True Will has the inertia of the Universe to assist him." - A. Crowley
