09-19-2018, 07:06 AM
Ended up releasing my sexual energy today, I actually feel better in that direction now, which is a relief. I have started to be more positively deliberate about it being ok to release now and then, accepting that is fine and totally ok. It's about feeling good no matter what decision I make.
When I release my mind finds it much easier to focus on my goals and women being much less of a priority. Which obviously makes sense why. There is many positives to both sides of the coin to be honest. I just want to feel, embody positive beliefs about both sides of the coin, then it is a win/win situation no matter what I choose.
I got offered that job, I knew I was going to get it anyway, just from how I felt from the Interview and I had a taster shift last weekend which was interesting.
So yeah this is a positive but feels totally normal though, like not a big deal. My mind is still thinking of all the things I gotta do next and where I want to go and that there is no time to celebrate because this is only the first step towards where I want to be.
I have started the English class once a week, so I gotta do this until exams in June 2019 and then I go onto another course which will be 3-4 days a week for a year and then in 2020 can do a 4 year degree.
So I am still at the beginning and I still have to focus on what is in front of me now for everything else to come after.
Having my own house after finishing the degree would be wonderful, thinking about now how I can put money aside each month over 5 years to save for a deposit on a decent mortgage by the time I finish the degree.
I am thinking about using visualisation more often and making it a daily practice to feel and focus on my wants, desires, goals. As if I don't focus consistently on what I want, I will end up focusing by default on what I don't want. Which sucks if I let that build up momentum.
Last night of round 5. Tomorrow 2 nights off. I thought my nights off started tonight, but they start from tomorrow. I am REALLY looking forward to my 2 nights off, It is going to feel so good.
When I release my mind finds it much easier to focus on my goals and women being much less of a priority. Which obviously makes sense why. There is many positives to both sides of the coin to be honest. I just want to feel, embody positive beliefs about both sides of the coin, then it is a win/win situation no matter what I choose.
I got offered that job, I knew I was going to get it anyway, just from how I felt from the Interview and I had a taster shift last weekend which was interesting.
So yeah this is a positive but feels totally normal though, like not a big deal. My mind is still thinking of all the things I gotta do next and where I want to go and that there is no time to celebrate because this is only the first step towards where I want to be.
I have started the English class once a week, so I gotta do this until exams in June 2019 and then I go onto another course which will be 3-4 days a week for a year and then in 2020 can do a 4 year degree.
So I am still at the beginning and I still have to focus on what is in front of me now for everything else to come after.
Having my own house after finishing the degree would be wonderful, thinking about now how I can put money aside each month over 5 years to save for a deposit on a decent mortgage by the time I finish the degree.
I am thinking about using visualisation more often and making it a daily practice to feel and focus on my wants, desires, goals. As if I don't focus consistently on what I want, I will end up focusing by default on what I don't want. Which sucks if I let that build up momentum.
Last night of round 5. Tomorrow 2 nights off. I thought my nights off started tonight, but they start from tomorrow. I am REALLY looking forward to my 2 nights off, It is going to feel so good.
