Strumming my Brain with MLS 3.0 Journal

[Ampersnd]

Day 81,

After many attempts over the phone, I was able to phone-order the microsilica. It cost 30$ less than expected, but it is still over 500$ in total for up-front monies, of which some of these will last multiple months, and I'm very likely to stretch them a little further, just because I'll inevitably be missing days.

FML, my essential oil suppository started leaking minutes after I put it in. LOL better here at home than on the road tomorrow.

Guitar playing is still sloppy. I've only been working on voice stuff in the car, but it's not moving forward. It's so frustrating, given that this subliminal is supposed to help me deconstruct what elite singers are doing and to recreate it unconsciously.

[Ampersnd]

Day 82,

Most of my products are said to have shipped; I got those emails. I realized that I forget to pick up Liposomal B-complex, but I'll get that next month.

Guitar playing seems to have been unlocked today; the fast long-winded riffs that I've wanted to play are getting locked down. It feels like twanging an elastic band. Although it isn't complete, it is a huge leap in performance. It's not that it's at full speed, but that I can make my fingers move to hit the notes at will, and a lot of that is at the speeds I want. Again, this might change tomorrow.

Singing is still a crapshoot. Been practicing.

[Ampersnd]

Day 84,

Had the equivalent of a few drops of blood in my stool. It certainly surprised me, but it didn't frighten me. Due to the nature of what I do with these suppositories, I might have scratched the inner wall of my colon (they're often frosted and a little sharp on the edges, even if they've partially melted). Or, they've dislodged something significant, and the detachment has caused a barren spot on my bowels.

If this continues, I'll feel compelled to seek medical attention. I've finished making essential oil concoctions with my supply. In other news, half of my detox ingredients have shipped. I can start using those in my suppositories instead. That will be MUCH less stress, simply due to the smell factor, and difficult to wash out texture of these oils. The coconut oil will still be involved as a solvent, but it's much less smelly.

Yesterday night, I started using the magnesium oil topically and a couple drops of pure iodine in my water. I went to bed to give myself seven hours, and I slept in by one hour, which is unusual. I can often get 6.0 - 6.5 hours, and hit the snooze twice.

I got two free coffees today without even trying.

When I was showering today, I started to pleasure myself. I cannot get over how vein-y my dong became; veins upon veins. It was actually ridiculous, and the climax was much more satisfying than those in the last two weeks.

I'm buying into the effects of this detox program. I'll have to create some sort of regiment for implementing these supplements in a way that would not cancel each other (like not mixing glutathione with microsilica, using zeolite and microsilica before bed, etc.)

[Ampersnd]

And now, my body stole 10 hours of sleep from me. Now completely out cold for the entire time, but too tired to do any except check the time every two hours and go back to sleep.

[Ampersnd]

Day 85,

Now, I'm up at around 2:30 am lol.
Got a library card from the local university. I spent one hour on the phone with my parents. I then spent a shitload of time practicing guitar and voice.

Had my cheat day today. I think I'll be phasing these out soon. Once the glutathione comes in through the mail, then the detoxing can properly begin. I'm almost out of those disgusting essential oil supps..

[Ampersnd]

When to bed at 2:45 am, and woke up at 8:15 am.

I woke up due to the realistic nature of the dream I was having. The night before, it was about catching a plane to go to Germany, for reasons unstated. This time, it was about me staying at an AirBnB, and somehow making all the right decisions to avoid being roofied, tied up, sodomized, tortured and chopped up by the cannibalistic psychopath owner of the place I was staying. The thing is, I was unaware I was making all the right decisions until after he and his accomplices were busted after I left. I hear from another that this guy 'loves' me, and that he kept talking about me. That freaked me out, and once awaking, I couldn't fall back asleep.

In other words; dreams are more lucid since taking the magnesium oil and iodine.

[Ampersnd]

Day 86,

So it sounds like I'll be running this subliminal until Day 90, wait a week, and then do another 90 days. The detox should be kicking on by the time that I start the new 3 month block.

[Ampersnd]

Day 87,

Was knocked out for 10 hours; thank goodness for Daylight Savings Time.
Had my acting class; even though I didn't feel like going, it's practice time that accumulates towards a final product. It was actually one of my worst days in a while. I think it's a psychological roadbump that I'm going through right now. Seems like I'll be stopping on Wednesday for about a week.

Not even been aware for 12 hours, and I'm already tired, lacking focus, and almost ready for bed (I also took melatonin).

[Ampersnd]

Thought I would give a couple of thoughts on my experience with MLS so far by giving my current score for the points on the sales page. Of course, there are things that are impossible to know whether they're working. I'll give a score out of ten, or a brief blurb.

1. Heal, clear and regenerate your mind and emotions in the ways that lead to achieving the goals of the program. (Has been happening right now.)
2. Learn at the maximum possible speed.(not sure that this is possible)
6. Generate intense desire to learn what you need and want to learn. (Not quite; depends on the topic); 6/10
7. Enjoy, look forward to and want to learn.
8. Improve your conscious short term and long term memory recall. (Very good); 8-9/10
9. Remove anxiety/fear concerning tests, exams, presentations and otherwise demonstrating and proving your knowledge. (Also very good); 9/10; doing improv and scenes with no fears
10. Develop conscious short term and long term memory and potential (excellent; I still remember the licence plate for the car that left its highlights on when I went to the pharmacy about 24 hours ago.) 9-10/10
11. Locate, access and utilize safe and optimal sources of knowledge to define all script words such that the end goals are successfully achieved. (No way to know)
12. Develop and use the ability to visually experience something and then automatically subconsciously analyze, deconstruct, figure out exactly how it was done, practice and optimize it subconsciously until you can do what you witnessed, or better. (Not great); 4/10
14. Focus on and concentrate on learning. (Poor ability to focus); 3/10
15. Optimize your dietary intake, eating times, amounts, types of foods you eat, etc. to achieve maximum learning speed. (My diet has changed since starting)
17. Kill procrastination for achieving the goals of this program. (LOL, I'm still having issues); 5/10
21. Optimize your sleeping patterns for achieving maximum learning speed and recall potential. (This and 22, 23; no way of knowing for sure)
26. Develop and improve your ability to detect, take advantage of and use patterns. (Yes; There has been improvement); 7/10
28. Make learning what you need to learn the primary focus in your life. (It has been, but to no avail in succeeding at it)
40. Adjust the amount of things I am learning at a time to my optimal for achieving the goals of the program. (I guess this is why there are things I want to learn, but actively choose to not learn)
41. Respond to setbacks in learning with more determination to succeed and more motivation to keep going and try harder. (Yes, but it's not always a lot of fun to persist lol)
42. Take all feedback and constructive criticism impersonally, and use it to achieve all of the goals of this program. (Oh my goodness, yes; no hard feelings about criticism); 10/10
43. Develop, increase and enhance motivation / determination / persistence / perseverance to learn. (Definite improvement)
49. Manifest exactly what and who you need to learn and achieve all of the goals of this program. (No way of knowing, but this would be nice)
50. Develop, improve and maintain laser-like focus and concentration while consciously trying to learn. (Still working on it; it works at work, but not at home).
63. Develop the ability to articulate what you have learned such that presenting, reporting and debating become effortless. (Sometimes getting severe brainfarts in the middle of talking; communication strained)
65. Create the reality of the thing in your mind, build it in your mind, optimize it in your mind, and then express the fully developed and optimized mental and/or physical result into reality. (Not quite yet)
72. Be considerate of those of lesser intellectual ability and capacity. (I'm much more humble about intellect and other people; we're all individuals, even if we're different).
73. Frame learning and the process of learning as being fun, enjoyable, easy and natural for you.
92. Make yourself distraction-proof. (Still working on it)
96. Keep yourself learning 24/7 subconsciously, with automatic conscious access to the newly learned information and skills. (I really want this to be true)
97. Achieve mastery of whatever subjects you want to or need to master. (Same with this one).
103. Detoxify the brain and body. (Have been working on this one)

[terry44]

Have you noticed improvement in reading speed/comprehension?

[Ampersnd]

Have you noticed improvement in reading speed/comprehension?

I would say so, because I can plow through material fairly quickly.
However, when it comes to material I want to read, I slow down, partially because I'm applying reading and writing skills to my day job. My reading speed is decent when I'm fresh and focused; right now, I'm not all that focused.

[Ampersnd]

Day 88,

Typical day; very happy and cheery at work, combined with this undercurrent of malaise that this carnival ride is going to be over, even though that might take decades.

I get home and find that my glutathione, molybdenum and liposomal vit c came in the mail today. I froze a lot of them as suppositories. The glutathione doesn't hold as a supp. but I tolerated it very well. An hour later, I tried the EDTA, and within 10 minutes, I had to use the bathroom. It seems like the EDTA has to be taken by mouth (on an empty stomach). Same goes with the NAC, which is used in a supp. laxative recipe. Will have to keep experimenting with what I tolerate when I get back from my two-day work circuit (I don't experiment with these things on the road).

With the iodine and molybdenum, it's a simple dropper, with which I take a couple of drops 2-3 times a day. I've felt a brief feeling of elevated well-being shortly after taking it.

I've had to discontinue my original concoction, which was basically a full-on laxative lol.

[Determined]

Hey man, what's driving you to go to these great lengths just to detox yourself?

[Ampersnd]

Hey man, what's driving you to go to these great lengths just to detox yourself?

Mostly, because I know where I come from. I don't expect for you to read my journals going back from 2013, but there's been an underlying issue throughout it. It wasn't until recently that I realized that it falls under the banner of 'health', and it so happens to be something under my control. Hence, the detox.

When I was a kid, I had severe asthma, which restricted my athletic performance and affected the circles I hung around. Throughout elementary school, despite having friends, I was often doing things alone and picking hobbies that isolated me from others. Since I was 7, I began having crushes on girls (my age), and never having it reciprocated. Since I was a kid, I've had bouts of insomnia, combined with extreme tiredness when waking up. I've had periods of being addicted to video games, and not being proactive in my life.

I'm realizing that sexual selection, even though it's been stated as 'this trait' or 'that trait', has the common trait that it requires health to possess. Intelligence requires a brain unscathed by poor health. Sexual charisma and performance requires health to maintain the hormones and chemicals implied. Motivation requires a healthy dopaminergic (motivation) system, which tend to be free from addictions when they run properly. Sleep is meant to energize by detoxifying your organs; but if they're loaded down, your body is spending all this time fighting to recover, but can't do it as efficiently. Your mitochondria (the 'batteries' in each of your cells), when loaded down with chemicals, can't complete the Krebs cycle as efficiently, which can lead to quicker energy depletion.

I can't say that I know the cause(s) of my problem(s) with complete certainty, but I'm well aware of the effects of them. I've had long bouts of insomnia, restlessness, unhappiness, bitter resentment towards the female sex, indignation, academic failures, and distractions.

This leads me to believe that I can fix these problems with a 'detox'. I'm not resorting to 7-day green shakes and enemas, but supplements that our bodies produce naturally, but are typically deficient. This is combined with chelators/binders, which grab onto the by-products, and are defecated, taking the toxic waste out of our bodies.

This leads me to what happened yesterday; I took a half sachet of glutathione (a chemical produced by the liver) with drops of iodine, molybdenum, and topical magnesium oil. I woke up after 6.5 hours, about 75% awake, with some extreme morning wood (was not there the day before). Throughout the day, I've had feelings of well-being, and optimism about my future. I had this inner knowing that I am full of untapped potential, and I had/have motivation to tap that potential. I also received inspiration for my next book, which isn't new, but a nice coincidence.

Addressing the underlying psychological issues to our problems is great. But I believe that neuro/biochemistry underlies our psychology, and it seems that I have some evidence of that.