Ricardo's - AM 6 Journal [FINISHED]

[Benjamin]

Great.. awesome results Ricardo!

-Ben

[SurferJoy]

Interesting journey , Ricardo

[Ricardo]

Thanks! Please feel free to chime in with any comments or suggestions.

[Spiritman]

It is interesting you said that your sex drive is higher. I just have noticed the past few days since I have started stage 5, that my sex drive is heating up. Seeing certain women who are very attractive (scale 9/10), get me horny very quickly lol Which I have to say my sex drive hasn't been too present lately until the very last few days of stage 4 and now since starting stage 5.

[Benjamin]

I like your progress at your work. I had a similar thing with Alpha 2011.

I'd get alot of crap from the guys I did security with and didn't know how to handle it. And when I started giving it back and standing up for myself they respected me way more and i'm good friends with them now even though we've all moved on from that job a few years ago. Initially it did take a bit of my getting angry and doing something about it. And I also realized that in a group of guys that giving each other crap like that is a bonding thing and when I was comfortable with that and gave it back was when we become good friends. I never was comfortable with that before then.

Though I can't say what the dynamic is in your office it reminded me of that.

-Ben

[Nationwide]

Sounds like you're doing great Ricardo. I'll be interested to see how Stage 3 goes for you.

Nationwide

[adam225]

Stage 3 was quite a shock for me, it kind of went from "this is pleasant" to "stop kicking me ass". It was quite a jump for sure... I'm still a bit confused to what it did exactly.

I'm sure you'll have your own experience though Ricardo - so don't hold onto mine or anyone elses.

[Ricardo]

Stage 3 Day 1..Rough night!

Although I was really tired when I went to bed, I could hardly sleep at all. I had this voice in my head going on and on about what a jealous little shit I was and how I'll never change, how everyone knows and laughs at me. I then dream't my friend was successfully chatting up this attractive girl he had never met before and was using these pick up lines. I was desperately wanting to interrupt and say "Don't listen to him he doesn't mean it, he's just using pick-up lines, he only wants to shag you!" then I tried kicking them from my seat to stop them talking. It's like the jealousy was consuming me. I was really glad to wake up!

Stage 1 seemed to have addressed the jealousy issue and up until starting Stage 3 I had really all but forgotten about it. I can see now why Shannon says to finish AM because not all the issues are addressed in totality at any one stage. You need all 6 stages.

Dreams are the one thing I've not really experienced differently with AM and I hope that if I do in the future that they're not all going to be negative

[Inconceivablezen]

Fucking crazy Ricardo! I've had the same thing. I'm in day 6 or 7 with stage 3. I've got EXACTLY the same, bad nights while thinking about failure. Just letting it happen and enjoying it somewhat

Drives the ambition in even higher gear!

[Ricardo]

***** crazy Ricardo! I've had the same thing. I'm in day 6 or 7 with stage 3. I've got EXACTLY the same, bad nights while thinking about failure. Just letting it happen and enjoying it somewhat

Drives the ambition in even higher gear!

Yes I have become a bit reflective of my past, I spent a lot of time yesterday playing old music on YouTube and thinking about my past and how I used to be and my thought processes at those times which led to my state of mind today.

[Inconceivablezen]

Music sounds a lot better to me than 3 months ago. I'm enjoying it more, being in the moment. Anyone else that noticed this difference?

[ffaux]

Music sounds a lot better to me than 3 months ago. I'm enjoying it more, being in the moment. Anyone else that noticed this difference?

YES! I am sitting here fist pumping to trance (https://soundcloud.com/tiesto/tiestos-cl...-guest-mix) as I type this (in between fist pumps obviously). I haven't listened and enjoyed trance in a LOOOOONG time.

[Ricardo]

Stage 3 Day 10

Not good!!!!

Just not feeling it at this time, no wonderful reflections in the mirror, walking
tall or looks from the ladies and no one seems to want to beat me up either My
exercises have taken a hit over the last 2 weeks. I feel like I'm wading through a
treacle of anxiety, even some of my recent posts in other parts of the forum look
unnaturally aggressive to me. I am nostalgic and unhappy, need peace and quiet
right now, don't want to go out or socialise. Sex drive vanished (which is good
news for the latest no fap challenge!)

I'm questioning what I want from AM. Do I want to be an Alpha Male in the truest sense? Don't winners get challenged, invite jealousies and troubles? I keep imagining people saying in the future "Do you remember the Indigo Mind Labs subliminal scam? Oh yeah I lost loads of money on that: Can't believe I was soo stupid! That Shannon made millions out of it but no one can find him to put him on trial. Mind you his Fonzy and Ryan characters were convincing! ha ha"

Having reoccurring dreams of visiting a very old workplace (a traumatic period in my life). Former staff were clearing out ready for the place to be demolished and there was a sense of finality that I had moved on. Even my old boss who I hated was half asleep in the chair with the office all untidy and hardly bothered to acknowledge me. That time of my life just had no meaning anymore.

Having dreams about ghosts and evil spirits that I used to get as a child and waking up in the middle of the night scared. This last one involved an unknown woman that I was interested in and I was always being put off my game by this voice telling me shit to do or I was no good. The woman then suddenly disappears and this writing starts to appear on my wall saying "I respect those who xxxxxxx" the rest was blurry. I made a serious effort and confronted this 'spirit' with massive aggression even though I was scared. The writing then just stopped and I woke up and had to check the part of my wall where the writing appeared. (no there was no writing!)

Having similar dreams about women being out of reach to me because of one thing or
another.

On a more positive note Zen seems to be kicking in, feeling very calm and level headed. Losing the knee jerk rection to bs or situations that used to wind me up

I hope Stage 3 is not just going to be a case of survival

[Natious]

I'm guessing that since stage 3 is the big guns, you may have some unresolved issues causing resistance that AM is pounding on this very moment. Since I started stage 2 and saw that it's harder than the first, I was quite sure the 3rd one will be something extreme. I guess I'll soon find out for myself too.

First run of AM6 seems to have been hard on almost everyone, don't sweat it, that's how it works