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Title: Overcoming Fear v.3 - 5.75.7G - Ampers&d's Journal
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#57
Day 22, T-Minus 159 days until end, 1st day off,

I've avoided reviewing coding videos for two days. I'm not excessively tired (though my forearms are still sore). A pattern of avoidance perhaps?

I'm still only getting 6.5 hours of sleep, despite good intentions to go to bed sooner.
 
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#58
Dude this shit is crazy (or a coincidence),
The 35-year old Russian girl, with whom I study code, admits that she had an intense sex dream with me (over and over) and that she wants to repeat it.
She was getting flustered and hot in the face every time it was brought up, or even with a look on camera.
She made a ton of sexual innuendo. And I was a witness to all of it.
 
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#59
Day 23, T-Minus 158 days until end, 2nd day off,

I think I'll run 2 loops, 3 days on.
We'll see what happens.


NOTE: Extra note. I've realized that our social graces, and our urgency to be polite, have to do with fear.
When someone makes a joke - especially someone of high status and/or attractive - there is a window of time where it is appropriate to react, and we knee-jerk ourselves into doing what we think will prevent that person from disliking us. That is to say, we are afraid of angering them and losing their regard towards us, even if it's not great.

EXTRA NOTE: I feel that I've been freed up from that compulsive urge to respond to people in that way. I had a 10-minute conversation with my boss that was very flowy and friendlier than I'm used to.
 
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#60
Holy hell.. 9 hours of sleep later, I stumble out of bed.
Good thing I had the day off of work.
 
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#61
Day 24, T-Minus 157 days until end, 1st day on,

Did two loops for the first time last night. It knocked me out for 9 hours. Great sleep.
Got 5 hours of coding done, then did my KneesOverToes exercise, then had a very relaxing first date.
She's not my usual type, but we have good conversational chemistry and I'd like to experience the sex with her, so why not?

Then, I went for a run. Now I'm coding again. Need to practice guitar before bed.
 
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#62
(05-20-2021, 02:09 PM)Ampersnd Wrote: Check out my time spent in deep sleep last night (the image says 'Today') vs the nights of the 18th and 19th of May.
I started OF v.3 on the night of the 19th.

20th: https://imgur.com/ar2mhqP (solid bar of deep sleep between 1-4 AM)
19th: https://imgur.com/l7VTfG2
18th: https://imgur.com/mBq5yfx

Oh wow, I barely get 19 mins of deep sleep every night!!!
When do you listen to the sub? day/night?

Btw please do not kill the bees
https://www.buzzaboutbees.net/10-Reasons...rtant.html

Bees tend to gravitate to me when in nature,usualy they come and rest, or they come cause of thirst or hunger.
I feed them and give them water, even pet them on their backs and "talk" to them (no I am not crazy), bees are wonderful creatures.
They will never sting you unless they feel endangered.
 
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#63
Day 25, T-Minus 156 days until end, 2nd day on,

I think that 2 loops per day is a bit too much firepower for now.
I'll try it tonight but will reassess tomorrow.
 
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#64
(06-11-2021, 11:02 PM)UniversalMan Wrote: Oh wow, I barely get 19 mins of deep sleep every night!!!
When do you listen to the sub? day/night?

Btw please do not kill the bees
https://www.buzzaboutbees.net/10-Reasons...rtant.html

Bees tend to gravitate to me when in nature,usualy they come and rest, or they come cause of thirst or hunger.
I feed them and give them water, even pet them on their backs and "talk" to them (no I am not crazy), bees are wonderful creatures.
They will never sting you unless they feel endangered.

I listen at night after two 30-minute loops of Sleep Induction. So, I'm almost guaranteed to be sleeping by the time it kicks on.

Bees are cool; I just never see bees. Only wasps and hornets. They still provoke a reaction if they fly in front of my face.
 
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#65
(Yesterday, 05:54 PM)Ampersnd Wrote: Day 25, T-Minus 156 days until end, 2nd day on,

I think that 2 loops per day is a bit too much firepower for now.
I'll try it tonight but will reassess tomorrow.

I feel like it is pushing the limit for sure. I always fall asleep when I listen to 2 loops. I do feel like it’s working tho.
 
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