OFv3 5.75.7G - Fear Nothing

[RTBoss]

Had a few days off Ofv3, and the dreams intensified in vivid fashion.  

Last night, I had a two significant dreams.

In the first, I was in a home, and when I started examining the foundation walls, I noticed that the earth was starting to seep through them, and sensing an impending collapse, I warned everyone to get out of the house.  I then found myself running as a hole in the earth was opening behind me, right on my heels.  I jumped to avoid falling into the chasm, and the dream ended before I could see if I was successful catching the edge.

The second dream was more meaningful, in terms of the sub's effects.  I've had recurring tornado dreams for years.  In this dream, I was in one of the most futuristic, largest, and safest/indestructible skyscrapers in a city.  I was a meteorologist, and a giant, destructive tornado was in the city and coming our way.  I was told to go to the center of the safest place in the skyscraper and broadcast live updates on the tornado.  The giant tornado enveloped the entire skyscraper, and I was completely safe and felt no fear, knowing there was nothing it could do to me.  Meanwhile, the tornado broke every exterior window and did massive superficial damage.  Just no damage to the interior/core of the building.

In waking life, everything is going really smooth.  Wife/kids were away for 4 days, and when they came back, my wife suddenly started referring to me by "love," which she's never done before.  It was always "honey" or something.  Not sure what's precipitated that.

[RTBoss]

I'll keep this short, since I'm in my car and typing on my phone...

I signed up for a new gym membership the other day that I'm excited about.  I just realized that I have very little desire for alcohol or eating shit food.  I know this feeling well, because it's something I've usually felt while running DMSI.  I wouldn't necessarily call it DMSI TID, because I don't have any plans to run DMSI until after I run UMSv2.  

It's almost as if making the decision to get a gym membership and workout again created its own TID, helping me make decisions now that will lead to where I ultimately want to be in the future.

[RTBoss]

Had a dream I kinda think I've had before.  I was with a guy friend, and he took me to his mom's house.  The house was in a beautiful, mountainous region, and she lived right on a lake.  The house was gigantic.  She pulled into the garage right after we did, in a super fancy car.  Then I recognized her as some famous actress.  She was happy to see us, and then offered me "Sour Cream Pie."  Never heard of it, and sounded weird, but I accepted.  In the dream, it was delicious.

Today, I went to the gym for the first time.  This decent looking girl was eyeing me while doing an exercise.  I went to the opposite side of the gym and did an exercise on a universal cable machine.  Next thing I know, she's setting up shop on the other side so that we're facing each other.  Then, I felt anxious. Didn't know what to do with myself in between sets, avoided looking at her, etc.  Only, I wasn't sure if I was feeling fear generated by me, or empathically feeling fear generated by her.  Weird experience.

[RTBoss]

Odd experience today:

I went to an appointment I'd had set for 2 weeks.  When I got there, I was told they didn't have what I need, but to go to another location.  That location didn't need an appointment.

After a longer drive, I got there and immediately noticed a woman I met at a restaurant bar during the bloom from DMSI 3.0.1. *Same one who showed me pics of herself in her underwear, said I was cute, and essentially wanted me to go home with her, even though I told her I was married*  She was with her kids.  I caught her staring multiple times.  Even so, I didn't have any real desire to strike up a conversation.  I could have, but didn't.  I wasn't (consciously) afraid, but I felt apathetic about it.  I was pleasantly surprised about the "coincidence," but not motivated to pull the trigger.

Other than that, the entire thing was a charade. My insurance didn't cover what I wanted, and I wasn't about to pay $300 out-of-pocket.

[RTBoss]

The day before yesterday, I decided I felt like my subconscious processing queue was full, and took a few days off. Last night, as per the norm when taking a break, I had multiple dreams. Again, the theme has seemed to change again.

One dream was a horror dream, literally - I was planning on watching all the Nightmare on Elmstreets (for some reason). I found out there was one I'd missed, because it was pulled before it's theatrical release 20 years ago, but now was available to watch as a bootleg. Next thing I know, I'm running through a forest at night, with some other guys, and we're all looking over our shoulders, like we're being chased by something unseen. Then the guy running in front of me was gunned down from behind. I was spared.

In another dream, I was in some sort of vacation rental. For reasons I don't understand, I was in it with some latinos and a latina. The latina offered herself to me. She looked good at first, but as her clothes revealed more skin, I found myself repulsed. Even though I turned her down, she was still very much friendly to me. Then the two latino guys were going through my closet. They found a horrible metallic pair of pants that glittered and went nuts over it. I hated it, and told them to take it, which made them deliriously happy. WTF?

When I woke up this morning, I was tired, moody, and feeling down. Went to the gym, which helped a little. Still feeling pretty "blah."

[THolt]

The day before yesterday, I decided I felt like my subconscious processing queue was full, and took a few days off.  Last night, as per the norm when taking a break, I had multiple dreams.  Again, the theme has seemed to change again.

One dream was a horror dream, literally - I was planning on watching all the Nightmare on Elmstreets (for some reason).  I found out there was one I'd missed, because it was pulled before it's theatrical release 20 years ago, but now was available to watch as a bootleg.  Next thing I know, I'm running through a forest at night, with some other guys, and we're all looking over our shoulders, like we're being chased by something unseen.  Then the guy running in front of me was gunned down from behind.  I was spared.

In another dream, I was in some sort of vacation rental.  For reasons I don't understand, I was in it with some latinos and a latina. The latina offered herself to me.  She looked good at first, but as her clothes revealed more skin, I found myself repulsed.  Even though I turned her down, she was still very much friendly to me.  Then the two latino guys were going through my closet.  They found a horrible metallic pair of pants that glittered and went nuts over it.  I hated it, and told them to take it, which made them deliriously happy.  WTF?

When I woke up this morning, I was tired, moody, and feeling down.  Went to the gym, which helped a little.  Still feeling pretty "blah."

Wow. That sounds like it was frightening. I have noticed some nightmares on OF V3 too. One I remembered for days which is unusual because usually I forget my dreams hours after waking up. 

Sounds OF is working on something

[RTBoss]

Another odd dream, and I think I know what it means.

I was on a sort of circuit-like obstacle course. The course was made up of different gym machines. They needed to be used in the correct sequence in order to move on properly. After I finished, suddenly my mentally disabled uncle is there trying to use the machines. I had to lead him along and show him how to properly use the machines, and in what order.

If I think of this dream as the different characters representing different aspects of my subconscious mind, I am the cooperative parts in the dream.  I think my uncle represents the part of my subconscious that isn't as higher functioning, takes more time to learn, and perhaps is only capable of thinking like a child (as my uncle is).  So it seems my subconscious is having to now lead those less developed or capable parts through accomplishing the goals of OFv3.

[RTBoss]

Back to running hybrid for 5-6 loops in the evening.

More differing dream themes - last night was Same Name, Different People.

- First dream, I was told I'd be hanging out and working with Tom Hardy. When I finally meet him, it's not the Tom Hardy I thought it would be. Instead, it was another actor by the same name, who was also famous in his own right (real in the dream, not in waking life, obviously).

- Second dream, I was introduced to a person with my same first name. In my entire life, I've maybe met 5 other people who have. I mentioned how rare it was to him, he agreed, and then I was told to go with him somewhere.

[RTBoss]

Wow, nearing the end of my 6-month journey. I'm ready.

I think running OFv3 longer, perhaps after a break, would be necessary to remove all fear. I'm not sure what's currently being worked on, but it must be big. I'm more tired, and feel more flashes of anxiety than usual. I also am a little easier to anger, or feel frustrated, lately.

So 11/21 is my last day, I believe...I'll take a few weeks off, sub-free, before starting UMSv2.

[majorSK]

Wow, nearing the end of my 6-month journey.  I'm ready.  

I think running OFv3 longer, perhaps after a break, would be necessary to remove all fear.  I'm not sure what's currently being worked on, but it must be big.  I'm more tired, and feel more flashes of anxiety than usual.  I also am a little easier to anger, or feel frustrated, lately.

So 11/21 is my last day, I believe...I'll take a few weeks off, sub-free, before starting UMSv2.

Feeling exactly like that I am finishing too but it feels like i need two months more. How long your break will be ? week or longer and then start again? I was thinking about going straight 8 months without break but I think a little break would spice things up.

[RTBoss]

Wow, nearing the end of my 6-month journey.  I'm ready.  

I think running OFv3 longer, perhaps after a break, would be necessary to remove all fear.  I'm not sure what's currently being worked on, but it must be big.  I'm more tired, and feel more flashes of anxiety than usual.  I also am a little easier to anger, or feel frustrated, lately.

So 11/21 is my last day, I believe...I'll take a few weeks off, sub-free, before starting UMSv2.

Feeling exactly like that I am finishing too but it feels like i need two months more. How long your break will be ? week or longer and then start again? I was thinking about going straight 8 months without break but I think a little break would spice things up.

Sorry, missed this.  I'm taking a two-week break.  Just finished my last loops last night.

I think I was overdoing it there for awhile - too many loops, not enough rest.  I've been doing more rest - a 3-day break here-and-there, and less loops (3-4, vs. 7-12).  

I felt great today (the past few days, even), and I've been sleeping better. 

Going to enjoy the break, and then it's on to UMS.  Should be interesting, considering my income from before LTUv6 through OFv3 has already multiplied by at least 25.

[Shannon]

Wow, nearing the end of my 6-month journey.  I'm ready.  

I think running OFv3 longer, perhaps after a break, would be necessary to remove all fear.  I'm not sure what's currently being worked on, but it must be big.  I'm more tired, and feel more flashes of anxiety than usual.  I also am a little easier to anger, or feel frustrated, lately.

So 11/21 is my last day, I believe...I'll take a few weeks off, sub-free, before starting UMSv2.

Feeling exactly like that I am finishing too but it feels like i need two months more. How long your break will be ? week or longer and then start again? I was thinking about going straight 8 months without break but I think a little break would spice things up.

Sorry, missed this.  I'm taking a two-week break.  Just finished my last loops last night.

I think I was overdoing it there for awhile - too many loops, not enough rest.  I've been doing more rest - a 3-day break here-and-there, and less loops (3-4, vs. 7-12).  

I felt great today (the past few days, even), and I've been sleeping better. 

Going to enjoy the break, and then it's on to UMS.  Should be interesting, considering my income from before LTUv6 through OFv3 has already multiplied by at least 25.

This is obviously TID from UMS v2.