04-05-2014, 01:51 PM
I reconnected with my inner child today. My inner child just sits in this dark room playing with Legos. I'm sure psychologically that's not a good sign.
A curious thing about meeting my inner child is that I now feel fulfilled by our meeting. What I was looking for in women (to be fulfilled, loved) I known I'll get from my inner child.
The only bad part about all of this is my inner child kind of hates me. My inner child wants nothing to do but sit around in his room and play all day. This seems to lead to my apathy in the real world and the large amounts of self-sabotage I put myself through, and maybe also why things don't seem to work out for me.
For example I consciously like sex, but my inner child finds it both gross and sinful. I already know that in the battle between the conscious and the unconscious, the unconscious always wins, so this isn't a very good sign.
I try and talk to my inner child and it just seems to hate everything I say. Even it's something that very obviously benefits him, he'll refuse to take it or do it just to spite me. Right now the only thing we can agree on is that we both like Natural Grounding lol.
It's a really interesting situation, and I know once we come to an agreement my life will get 5x as better. Right now the only thing I have to do is balance my adult needs with those of my inner child and have patience that everything will turn out ok.
I hope I can become a good parent to my inner child and teach it about being happy, productive and loving life because that would definitely make us both happier in the long run.
Natural grounding is really softening my ego as well. I find that when I watch the videos it triggers me in all sorts of ways. I find myself going through several negative emotions, and it's nice that they're popping up because now I can deal with them. It's also making me more comfortable with feminine energy, which saves me a lot of inner fear.
The only way to have become accustomed to feminine energy before NG would have been to approach a lot. And I know most of those approaches would have ended with me beating myself up over what I wasn't able to do or not do, so this is nice.
I'm also achieving real inner peace, because I try to actually meditate when watching. I slow down, ignore my thoughts and focus on my breathing while watching
A curious thing about meeting my inner child is that I now feel fulfilled by our meeting. What I was looking for in women (to be fulfilled, loved) I known I'll get from my inner child.
The only bad part about all of this is my inner child kind of hates me. My inner child wants nothing to do but sit around in his room and play all day. This seems to lead to my apathy in the real world and the large amounts of self-sabotage I put myself through, and maybe also why things don't seem to work out for me.
For example I consciously like sex, but my inner child finds it both gross and sinful. I already know that in the battle between the conscious and the unconscious, the unconscious always wins, so this isn't a very good sign.
I try and talk to my inner child and it just seems to hate everything I say. Even it's something that very obviously benefits him, he'll refuse to take it or do it just to spite me. Right now the only thing we can agree on is that we both like Natural Grounding lol.
It's a really interesting situation, and I know once we come to an agreement my life will get 5x as better. Right now the only thing I have to do is balance my adult needs with those of my inner child and have patience that everything will turn out ok.
I hope I can become a good parent to my inner child and teach it about being happy, productive and loving life because that would definitely make us both happier in the long run.
Natural grounding is really softening my ego as well. I find that when I watch the videos it triggers me in all sorts of ways. I find myself going through several negative emotions, and it's nice that they're popping up because now I can deal with them. It's also making me more comfortable with feminine energy, which saves me a lot of inner fear.
The only way to have become accustomed to feminine energy before NG would have been to approach a lot. And I know most of those approaches would have ended with me beating myself up over what I wasn't able to do or not do, so this is nice.
I'm also achieving real inner peace, because I try to actually meditate when watching. I slow down, ignore my thoughts and focus on my breathing while watching
