07-23-2017, 05:15 PM
(This post was last modified: 07-23-2017, 06:02 PM by Bookstacks DC737.)
Day 3 of MLS
-18 days of DMSI 3.1
I'm aware of one change in a very consistent pattern I've had for the last few years: my ability to cope with my hypervigilance/panic-attacks/flashbacks has increased, off medication.
As a result of growing up in a violent house, even now when I'm out in public I tend to be very paranoid about getting attacked or somehow harmed.
My hypothesis was that the fight/flight instinct shuts down the parts of the brain related to learning in favor of strengthening all the parts related to survival. To learn at maximum speed, I couldn't continually engage my fight/flight/freeze instincts, as that would be counterproductive. So MLS may actually be of great help in getting over my PTSD or at least coping with it better day-to-day.
So far I've found this to be true. I've actually gone off all my anti-anxiety medication in testing this.
What MLS does for me is that during the states of high-anxiety, I can often forget that I'm safe in the panic. It's a simple thing, but in a high-anxiety state the parts of my brain that are responsible for that shut down. On MLS, when the anxiety begins, I notice I re-examine the situation, notice all the triggers, and calmly remind myself that I'm safe, breathe and let it go much faster than off MLS. I'm able to do this off MLS of course, but it usually requires more energy, more time, more attention to my anxiety than I can often give it.
I'm interested in seeing how the healing of MLS will effect this. Currently, I haven't found the healing in E2 or DMSI to do much more than slightly lessen the symptoms, or make me okay with them. The day-to-day coping though can often be exacerbated by the healing, which has caused me much grief when I've had to be around people for extended periods of time.
Programming Progress:
One of my goals is to obtain a B.S. in Computer Science. So I'll be using MLS to increase my goals and achieve all the other academic things I need for this.
A sub-goal of attaining my degree is to immediately achieve a job where I can use my programming knowledge day-to-day. The absolute lowest entry job for this is becoming a Test Automation Engineer or a QA Developer, a goal I should be able to complete within 4 months. Hopefully MLS shortens this journey.
Anyway, on day 2 I logged into the coding site FreeCodeCamp. My previous high score was 91 coding assignments completed. Looking at the day of completion I saw that I had accomplished this over a total of 4 days in October of 2015. I got up to 95 in 2 hours sitting down with my laptop day 2, which is one of the first concrete signs that MLS is working for me as far as learning goes.
The tasks themselves aren't so hard, but my concentration and mastery of new knowledge in a field I'm not familiar with is crap. The fact that I was able to sit down and plug away for the whole 2 hours (taking 3-5 min breaks every 25 mins, also a sub-goal of MLS ) tells me that the subliminal is working quite well.
I'm currently doing more tasks as I type this and find that my ability to recall what I learned previously is very high. Within a few minutes I feel like I jumped right back into finishing the session I started yesterday. All the data is immediately available to me.
Edit: the average time for completion is 5 hours.
Granted I had done the majority of tasks before, but that was almost 2 years previously.
-18 days of DMSI 3.1
I'm aware of one change in a very consistent pattern I've had for the last few years: my ability to cope with my hypervigilance/panic-attacks/flashbacks has increased, off medication.
As a result of growing up in a violent house, even now when I'm out in public I tend to be very paranoid about getting attacked or somehow harmed.
My hypothesis was that the fight/flight instinct shuts down the parts of the brain related to learning in favor of strengthening all the parts related to survival. To learn at maximum speed, I couldn't continually engage my fight/flight/freeze instincts, as that would be counterproductive. So MLS may actually be of great help in getting over my PTSD or at least coping with it better day-to-day.
So far I've found this to be true. I've actually gone off all my anti-anxiety medication in testing this.
What MLS does for me is that during the states of high-anxiety, I can often forget that I'm safe in the panic. It's a simple thing, but in a high-anxiety state the parts of my brain that are responsible for that shut down. On MLS, when the anxiety begins, I notice I re-examine the situation, notice all the triggers, and calmly remind myself that I'm safe, breathe and let it go much faster than off MLS. I'm able to do this off MLS of course, but it usually requires more energy, more time, more attention to my anxiety than I can often give it.
I'm interested in seeing how the healing of MLS will effect this. Currently, I haven't found the healing in E2 or DMSI to do much more than slightly lessen the symptoms, or make me okay with them. The day-to-day coping though can often be exacerbated by the healing, which has caused me much grief when I've had to be around people for extended periods of time.
Programming Progress:
One of my goals is to obtain a B.S. in Computer Science. So I'll be using MLS to increase my goals and achieve all the other academic things I need for this.
A sub-goal of attaining my degree is to immediately achieve a job where I can use my programming knowledge day-to-day. The absolute lowest entry job for this is becoming a Test Automation Engineer or a QA Developer, a goal I should be able to complete within 4 months. Hopefully MLS shortens this journey.
Anyway, on day 2 I logged into the coding site FreeCodeCamp. My previous high score was 91 coding assignments completed. Looking at the day of completion I saw that I had accomplished this over a total of 4 days in October of 2015. I got up to 95 in 2 hours sitting down with my laptop day 2, which is one of the first concrete signs that MLS is working for me as far as learning goes.
The tasks themselves aren't so hard, but my concentration and mastery of new knowledge in a field I'm not familiar with is crap. The fact that I was able to sit down and plug away for the whole 2 hours (taking 3-5 min breaks every 25 mins, also a sub-goal of MLS ) tells me that the subliminal is working quite well.
I'm currently doing more tasks as I type this and find that my ability to recall what I learned previously is very high. Within a few minutes I feel like I jumped right back into finishing the session I started yesterday. All the data is immediately available to me.
Edit: the average time for completion is 5 hours.
Granted I had done the majority of tasks before, but that was almost 2 years previously.