**Jake's Overcoming Fear v.3 5.75.7G Journal**

[Qiel]

@Jake2015
I honestly believe one day you will talk to someone you haven't seen in a very long time and then and only then when they tell you how much you have changed since the last time they last saw you is when you will finally believe the subliminal worked!!

Exactly. In my experience, the subs somehow change facial structure as well, it's like gotten better into golden ratio. How could I knew? Because someone told me I'm different aestethically yet I didn't remember doing something different to my regime. It's type C so it may possible.

@Jake2015, some user already doing the autoconfig mode, so if your subconscious tell you that one loop a day then maybe that's what suit you best.

Me personally, I don't want to use the subs more than one loop a day and as instructed. I love it when I'm 'forced' to believe in myself, in my subconscious, that the subs is work.

[CatMan]

In your case, it doesn't seem like a good idea to stop daily reporting. Seems dangerous.

Too much of a risk of another "some thing happened, so I couldn't listen" situation again, when you come back and post a month from now. It's been a pattern. It's vital for you to stay on this aggressively, post daily to help keep yourself accountable. No sub can work if it isn't listened to and used properly as per directions.

All the best.

[Jake2015]

@Jake2015
I honestly believe one day you will talk to someone you haven't seen in a very long time and then and only then when they tell you how much you have changed since the last time they last saw you is when you will finally believe the subliminal worked!!

Thanks for this 4Kingdoms. Yeah this thought had also occurred to me and hope it is the case at the very least.

[Jake2015]

@Jake2015
I honestly believe one day you will talk to someone you haven't seen in a very long time and then and only then when they tell you how much you have changed since the last time they last saw you is when you will finally believe the subliminal worked!!

Exactly. In my experience, the subs somehow change facial structure as well, it's like gotten better into golden ratio. How could I knew? Because someone told me I'm different aestethically yet I didn't remember doing something different to my regime. It's type C so it may possible.

@Jake2015, some user already doing the autoconfig mode, so if your subconscious tell you that one loop a day then maybe that's what suit you best.

Me personally, I don't want to use the subs more than one loop a day and as instructed. I love it when I'm 'forced' to believe in myself, in my subconscious, that the subs is work.

Thanks man and yeah for now I love the 1 loop as this is easy to fit into my day and the 2 days on and 3 days off is good but yeah its clear I wanted to run it daily for a moment back there on 1 of my day offs. So lets see how it pans out as more cycles are passed.

[Jake2015]

In your case, it doesn't seem like a good idea to stop daily reporting. Seems dangerous.

Too much of a risk of another "some thing happened, so I couldn't listen" situation again, when you come back and post a month from now. It's been a pattern. It's vital for you to stay on this aggressively, post daily to help keep yourself accountable. No sub can work if it isn't listened to and used properly as per directions.

All the best.

do you mean this for me or Qiel, catman?

I am so far reporting daily but I know its taking some time out of my schedule currently and for me there may be a day here or there where I dont report but for now its daily as usual for me.

yeah this is definately aimed at me and yeah ill aim to post daily and try and note down anything and everything that i can. what I dont want to do though is become too fixated on the results as then im unsure if im seeing things that are happening or trying to see into things when nothing is happening.

[Jake2015]

10/180
Day 10 OFF - Fri 28 May - OFF #3

Today was my 3rd and final day off before I start listening again and just having a day off was refreshing and relaxed. In the past for me it got stressful trying to fit in listening especially when I had to get in more than 8hours worth of loops and this was on a irregular schedule. I could argue that perhaps it even felt at times stressful too. This 1hour 2 days on is more chilled and relaxed and I know that even if I cant or dont want to listen I can just hit play on my phone and have it near me for the 1 hour.

Whereas I think 2 days ago I had the desire to listen 1 loop but daily and wondered if that was correct and then I think yesterday I decided that no 3 days off is better for me, well today I had no feeling of anything in that regards. No thought whether more or less is better simply that what is is cool.

Today was a crazy day which may or may not affect the experiences of today. So I due to university online webinars as those of you following me know, has messed up my sleep and lastnight I fell asleep around 9am. I woke at 3am and had to rush for a doctors appointment so ate nothing all day long.

My bro took me in his car as he had some errends to run so after the docs we went for a bit of a ride around some parts of my city that ive personally never been to. It was hot I was dehydrated as ate and drank nothing and needed food and water. We got to a point where my bro I think was annoying me with his constant need to talk and make chit chat and it made me lose my cool spontaneously and briefly.

Another noted moment was when he suddenly accelerated. Im not a scardy cat as we brits would say however sometimes that approach towards a red stop when a car is infront could cause anxiety. In myself the feeling of anxiety was 0.1-1seconds at best. It was so subtle and spontaneous and yet left and I wondered ok did I just see the sub work or is this how I reacted and calmed myself due to logically knowing that my bro was in control of the car as my conscious mind thought this too. Im unsure but it was something that made me think for sure.

Another moment is I got home and my sis was helping me but I got agitated thinking shes being dumb and not adhering to my instructions. I realised she was. So I apologised even though I only lost my cool for a brief moment.

Another moment was where my bro before we left for the docs got under my skin and tried to. I think it did and I tried not to show it.

Another moment today I recall is where I got under my brothers skin and then just gave up annoying him for fun. I dont think I felt any angst or tension within.

I cant remember everything but these things all stuck in my mind now at 3.33am as I type this. So overall the feelings I felt that I know are negative im sharing.

Other than this I was losing it closer to meal time which for me became 9.30-10pm and then soon as I can ate my mood and atitude improved immediately.

I woke yes exhausted but as is expected with my sleep schedule.

Around 1am I was getting tired and more exhausted as the night went on. I was so tired I wasnt going to come on and type this but well im more awake now and so I am. Thats really all I can think of sharing at the moment.

I do wonder if im feeling more calmer and less anxious but then Ive shared the above and wonder am i or is it simple what im trying to feel due to all the journals ive read.

anyway so that is that for now and ill start my next journal straight away....


addendum:

Lol I forgot to mention a sudden and slight soreness in my back. ive mentioned it before and did not think it was related to the sub and now again I had it for around 1min on and off. Is it relevent I dont know it is the sub no idea but data it shall become.


Addendum2:
So another thought just hit me. So I got an email from uni today telling us what will happen with our online classes next week. I saw the email pop up and instead of anxiety I just went ahead and opened it on my phone and realised its better to open on my laptop later in the day to checkout the various word docs attached. So before going to docs I think it was (maybe it was when I got home who cares right) point is I opened it and saw that they set up some "homework" of a list of questions they want us to answer and submit in around 10 days time. I didnt fear it but felt ok this is simply and easy and I can easily do this.
I just thought of this now because I wondered since im sat reading everyones journals, and getting through my 1 loop for tomorrow (see the next post as its now 4.04am and im listening as I type as explained in the next post) that I may as well start on that homework lol.
Ok so just checked and my 1 loop has finished so no ill go to bed now and listen to some youtube stuff and fall asleep. Home work can wait but hey worth a mention.

[Jake2015]

11/180
Day 11 ON - Sat 29 May - ON #1

So as per my previous post, the time of typing this is now 3.40am
I am playing the sub next to me through my s10 with 13/15 volume as usual.

Again I decided rather than playing this whilst I slept ill do it as im awake.

I am currently 37mins into the 1hour play time and I cannot say I am feeling anything worthy of noting.

Ill see how the day progress once I wake and note anything later as usual.

Addendum:
So as per my post above in Addendum #2, its now 4.06am, ill quickly skim other journals and then off to bed. Ill update this journal later.

[Jake2015]

11/180
Day 11 ON - Sat 29 May - ON #1 - part 2

So this isnt strictly to do with this day but yesterday. Im adding it here though because I remembered about it today.

So I woke not too long ago (4pm) had my wash etc and then realised another experience took place for me yesterday.

Whilst sat in the car as a passenger i tend to usually drift off. I drifted off again. I was awake but my mind was elsewhere. I remembered a time at high school when I got into a argument with another guy at school. We didnt get physical but I stood up to the fool.
Except that in this daydream I was having I imagined I knew martial arts like Lu Kang from the 90s epic mortal kombat movie (the recent one was boring and a mistake lol) anyway and I ended up not only fighting him in my day dream but fighting 3 or 4 others doing summersaults over their heards or running up a wall like Neo from the matrix and during all this telling them "i dont want to fight them, I dont want to hurt them etc" and then at the end telling them all what a load of idiots they all at this school are.

Is this OF? I dunno but its here now as data.

--

For today nothing so far to say but ill see how I go along.

[Shannon]

That sounds like OF.

[Kol]

+1 sounds like OF

[Jake2015]

That sounds like OF.

ok so I read this earlier in the day but from my phone and was smiling so much!!!! hahahahaa if its true than @Shannon this is cause for celebration!! 

[Jake2015]

+1 sounds like OF

hahah im smiling now seeing this too I hope its the case!!! 

[Jake2015]

11/180
Day 11 ON - Sat 29 May - ON #1 - part 3

So this is the conclusion of my journal for today. As I type this I am NOT listening to the sub so tonight the sub will be placed when I sleep and thus will be the start of my next post with that.

Today had a little soreness in back again for a brief moment or so and again in my neck too.

I also felt very tired today but not when I woke nor until I ate dinner late which was at 9pm then i felt very tired. Im however now (3.26am) im wide awake thanks to my good friend coca the cola lol

I have had some arguments with my bro today but dont feel perhaps as anxious as usual yet then saying that I do feel still agitated inside too so its a 50/50 catch at the moment.

However my answers back to my sis regarding some issues such as "the neighbours are out in their garden and so lets watch what we say" have been more positive than my usual positive such as "fuck them lets play the music its our house were allowed to" for example. I am usually like this but not every single time so im more aware and conscious due to this sub and also trying to see am I changing etc.

Around 2am I was sat with mum who was awake (yes a night owl and the reason my sleep is bad as im awake until mum sleeps to keep her company thus then fight the urge to sleep as i feel this is due to being angry internally ive had to do this and its something ive mentioned for 5 or 6years of being here on this forum) when we heard and got startled by the sound of something falling to the floor. This time unlike the last time (from 1 of my previous posts) I did feel anxiety yes and went to check the noise out but noticed I was anxious when startled and thus a little fearful inside.

other than this nothing else. I havent felt the urge to listen more however. I feel for now atleast 1 listen a day is nice. I do wonder if I should reduce the number of days off but I want to give it longer than 14 days before I make that decision. I say this as I want to see when im on my days off how much I miss listening to the sub or have the desire to listen more.

I have no desire however to listen less. In all honesty I feel 1 loop is insignificant. I dont feel am I listening enough just whether more is better if that makes sense at all. Its hard to explain and im trying to be clear and accurate to not give the wrong data.

[Qiel]

So, did you reduce the caffeine intake and drink more water?