08-22-2013, 12:41 PM
Today I am using A.M 5 for 12 days now approximatively ( I need to check my calendar to be sure) , and I am feeling very depress ! I notice a huge increase of my neediness with women ! I have 2 sexy girlfriends but I am feeling needy all the time, it is like I don't have enough girlfriends. So I have texted monday 5 of my exs that I want to see and only 2 of them text me back and are ok to see me. It make me feel upset that only 2 of 5 want to go out with me ! And it is like rejection is 10 times harder when I am approaching a girl in the street... Ouch
I have a lot of doubt now, like when I see an ugly guy with a hot chick I am saying to myself : "Oh man even this guy can have a hot girl with him why it is so hard for me to have one of them ? Maybe am I less attractive than him ? Am I not cool enough ? I must have a problem somethings is wrong with me.... blablabla "
I force myself to go out everyday ! Talk with stranger and see my friends and my girlfriends.
But I don't know how to deal with all this bad feeling... Do I have to face them and accept them ? Cry and be depress at home ? Or it is ok for me to go out and try to change my mind and have good time ? Because I thought is like I try to avoid my garbage within me if I go out to change my mind no ? And if I try to avoid my feeling the subs won't be effective because all my negative feeling will stay here ! ? ! ?
So the subs seems to work for me even if I understand only 30% or 40% of what I heard when I am listening to english music or movie in english... Or maybe It is just a coincidence all this negative feeling and thought that I have ?
I have a lot of doubt now, like when I see an ugly guy with a hot chick I am saying to myself : "Oh man even this guy can have a hot girl with him why it is so hard for me to have one of them ? Maybe am I less attractive than him ? Am I not cool enough ? I must have a problem somethings is wrong with me.... blablabla "
I force myself to go out everyday ! Talk with stranger and see my friends and my girlfriends.
But I don't know how to deal with all this bad feeling... Do I have to face them and accept them ? Cry and be depress at home ? Or it is ok for me to go out and try to change my mind and have good time ? Because I thought is like I try to avoid my garbage within me if I go out to change my mind no ? And if I try to avoid my feeling the subs won't be effective because all my negative feeling will stay here ! ? ! ?
So the subs seems to work for me even if I understand only 30% or 40% of what I heard when I am listening to english music or movie in english... Or maybe It is just a coincidence all this negative feeling and thought that I have ?
