10-10-2015, 03:21 PM
(10-07-2015, 01:04 PM)AlphaScorpio Wrote: I appreciate the supportive comments and resources.
I have made a decision to go with Emotional healing pain relief for 100 days. Reason being is that I still think theres some emotional blocks, fears guilts and shames that are still having a hold on me moving forward and sapping me of my energy that I need for life. So starting today.
I am considering starting on a course to be a tree surgeon, looking after the forests and cutting sick or dying trees with a chainsaw - while I will admit this isnt the job that makes my heart leap with passion or ambition I need to start progressing, moving forward and what the heck being in nature is great, lots of time to be at peace with myself and my thoughts - seriously looking into this job but I am right now noticing how already at the thought of starting something new my mind is playing tricks on me, self sabotaging my efforts to move forward - this really fucks me off which is part of the reason I am using EHAPR.
I've also looked into David Deida and I'm finding his stuff pretty interesting allowing the masculine and feminine energies and I can definately see how I have developed some negative masculine traits as well as feminine ones.
I would say my biggest emotional blocks at the moment are;
-Anger - towards the world/towards my sister/towards my mother and father
-Fear - of moving forward, taking a risk
-Bitterness and some jealousy - towards my sister who is moving forward well in her life
-Resentment - towards my mother, this is a deep one that I can't quite put my finger on the reason why.
As noted you can see that there are some deep issues I still need to work through. I am also planning on moving out ASAP but finances are an issue right now so I don't expect it to happen soon.
The goal is for EHAPR to help me work through these emotional blocks, after the 100 days I will most likely go with ASC 5g to build some more confidence.
Cheers
The book "Wild Nights" by David Deida was the first domino that lead to how I got good with women. Fantastic book.
