DMSI 3.1 Journal and Progress

[ChocolateMilk]

So, like a lot of guys on the forum, I decided to purchase DMSI and see if it can help me with getting laid a bit more. I've tried lots of different things, from PUA books to pheromones and figured why not try a subliminal or two? What really attracted me to subliminal-shop was the Absolute Self-Confidence sub sample, and the effect it had on me. My voice got deeper, people gave me more deference...It was kind of cool. I only ran it for a short time though and picked up DMSI soon afterwards.

This in and of itself is going to be a challenge; I'm a "smoke weed err'day!" kind of guy but luckily I ran out right after purchasing DMSI, so that's not an issue right now. Drinking, the same. My job and field involve a lot of drinking but more on that in a moment...

DAY 1-

Broke out the subs, started with two loops of the Ultrasonic track since it would be easier to listen to music or do other things in my room while I listen. I did get a bit jittery and high-energy, enough to do the dishes (which I HATE).

I work in a high-stress job and today was no different except all the stress was inward or "in my head". I kept on remembering things from my past (similar to most everyone else's experience) as well as recent happenings with the opposite sex and comparisons to other men who are better at getting laid. If something annoying happened, I would instantly get "inflamed" since angry isn't the right word; it's like a surge of fire and my mind would start going crazy (usually directed at the annoying thing but, my conscious thought would veer into other territory until I was frustrated about something completely different).

All of this was made somewhat easier to deal with because I've been using a technique that I learned in Systema; inhaling a breath of air for 20 seconds and exhaling it for 20 seconds. For whatever reason, this just shuts off the "negative loop" that I feel in my head and has been a godsend technique for me. Just keep doing it till the negative thoughts subside. Best thing, it's hardly noticeable and can be done anywhere. It is hard though and you have to be aware enough to recognize when you're in a negative loop (which can be hard).

What made today interesting and is pushing me to continue with DMSI is that once I had done the breathing exercise, my mind started "coming back" but with positive thoughts and feedback.

Example:

"Why can't girls just like me for who I am? Why do I have to be a dick or not be "nice"? Why do people think I'm too nice? What's wrong with nice?"

=Breathing=

"It's not about being nice or bad. If you're giving people the vibes that they want, they won't care about your morality. Remember "Adam the Shitbag" and how he had girls over all the time, despite living in squalor and filth? Remember "Tex", the well-groomed playboy you knew back in Georgia? Both sides of the same coin."

To put it short, I had a bunch of mini-epiphanies and "ah-ha!" moments. I even felt better, a little more energetic. When I get into what I call "black moods" where my mental loops don't shut off, people tend to avoid me like the plague. Once I started the breathing techniques and began to "lighten" with each positive mental note, people started engaging and laughing with me.

It wasn't just that I got through the negative but that there was a positive that hadn't been there before. Most of the time, it's just "empty space" or mild to extreme negativity. I realized, among many things, that I had a lot of internal negativity that tainted even my happy moments.

So yeah!

Needless to say I was digging DMSI, until my boss brought over a honey mead he made, very strong stuff. I had half a cup and while delicious, something changed with my thought process. Things started getting to me again, and I actually forgot about my breathing techniques. By the end of the day I felt mentally exhausted. Negative loops suck and I learned a valuable lesson early: DO NOT DRINK WHILE USING SUBS, AT ALL!!! "Avoid" is to polite of a word as I thought a small cup of it wouldn't do me badly but it did fuck with my UP vibe.

Still, I saw a glimmer of hope in this. I plan on doing Side A until I go 3 weeks without negative mental loops or 30-60-90 days if there is no discernible progress.

(So if I were to go the prescribed 30+ days and suddenly feel "clear" or "healed" I won't switch to Side B until three weeks AFTER that provided that I don't get another neg-loop.)

I realize that it's my negativity, lack of openness, and my lack of "fun" that is killing my game and making it WAYYY harder for me to connect with women.

It's going to be an interesting break from my vices...Hopefully there will be some entertaining lay reports as well.

Music of the day: Dumbfoundead- SAFE

[Shannon]

The bad news is, alcohol, weed, nicotine and even caffeine will all interfere with the state shifting the program uses to make itself work. The good news is, you're really open to the program, and this sensitivity is teied to why you drink and smoke out every day.

DMSI has both healing and clearing, and an auric shield that will prevent you from being affected by or influenced by any negative energy from outside yourself. The negativity within you... that's for you to clear out. And you will on DMSI.

I suggest you consider that drinking and smoking is self medication for extra sensitivity, and try to let DMSI have it;s way instead of interfering with what it;s trying to do.

[ChocolateMilk]

Thanks Shannon! I was actually thinking about some of the things you brought up today...Things are really getting, well, for lack of a better word, synergistic.

DAY 2-

Did the usual two loops, ultrasonic as usual with various music playing in the background. I didn't get any physical, mental, or emotional reaction from the loops while listening. After, though, that was a different story. I felt MANIC and high-energy afterwards with an enthusiasm I haven't felt in...Well, years! I was bobbing my head and singing in the shower, rhyming, and just generally enjoying myself.

I wish I could have gone out and gotten into some trouble but, it was a workday, so no dice since my shifts are pretty long. Once I got at work I noticed a shift in everyone's demeanor towards me, it was all smiles and laughter. A couple of friends of mine showed up at the restaurant; one of which immediately gave me a bunch of IOI's after I complimented her dress. She's a bigger girl and not my type but while I was working, she kept eyeballing me and twirling her hair. So far so good but, I think she's had a thing for me for a while. It used to make me uncomfortable when I thought she was flirting but today, I was just like "Enjoy the show, babe!"

Things got even more interesting with another girl I work with. She has, quite possibly, the greatest ass in the world and it doesn't hurt that she loves short dresses when it's hot (which it was). We talked during break about martial arts and such, and she's interested in trying Systema out, which I told her she would love. She then told me a story about living near a big naval academy and how rowdy the students would get. She said, "I thought I was gonna get fucked!" It was the way she said it, the way her eyes locked on mine...

WELL OKAY THEN!!!

She's leaving our workplace soon though, and happened to mention she's going to be unemployed for a short while with nothing to do...Yep, I'm definitely going to take a swing at that butt.

Later in the evening, I'm busy cleaning out my station and getting things shut down for the night when I get the urge to do a deep clean of our cooler. So there I am, reaching deep into this cooler as I'm scrubbing it out, I turn and there is our cute and bubbly bartender crouched down to the point that she was staring directly at my butt. Her eyes are wide and she starts the whole "OH don't mind me, just cleaning...stuff...hahaha!" Our stations are right next to each other since it's an open kitchen.

I had a good chuckle and thought nothing of it (maybe I'm imagining things) but she then stayed and hung out while me and the other guys were cleaning, staring at me the whole time. She NEVER does this. She doesn't hang out at length or dawdle, very much a "go to work, go home" type of gal. Clear fixation body language. It was nice but, I'm not going to read too much into any workplace IOIs. Not saying I wouldn't complain or make something happen if an opportunity presented itself, I'm just going to let things happen naturally and go with it.

I did come to some interesting ideas though. Shannon mentioned that I was really open to the program and I have always been known as a bit of a gullible or sensitive guy. I wear my heart on my sleeve and used to take it as a negative that I wasn't as savvy or calculating as other people. I fall in love hard, hate hard, and feel hard. Giggity.

I also realized that a supplement that I take has a LOT of caffeine in it (albeit, from green tea but still) and I've been trying to quit smoking cigarettes as well...I'm going to switch to a low nicotine vape pen to ween myself off of the stuff permanently. As for the supplement, I can find a replacement somewhere. As for the booze, everyone at work looked at me like I was from outer space when I said I wasn't drinking anytime soon, lol.

Another interesting note is my lack of drive to go to the gym, which I think was out of body image/attractiveness issues; or to quote Roger from Family Guy "Those abs look angry..." I still want to go workout but I'm content to give my body some rest as I was pushing myself WAYYY too hard in the gym. Don't get me wrong, I love the gym but, having taken some time off, all the aches, pains, and soreness from all that work are kicking in. I'll be back on the weights on Monday but, for now, I'm going to take the physical exertion slow.

Also, biggest epiphany of the day: I realized that attraction has more to do with "energy" than anything else. It's something between a vibe, body language, smell, aura, and all that and more. Some people are more in tune with it than others and thus they get more sex and female attention than the average guy. I started reading a book called The Aiki Singularity: Trans-formative Power and it talks about Qi and Energy and how to harness it. It couldn't hurt to test out my energy theories while I'm doing this subliminal, as there are exercises and drills to help increase one's internal energy for a variety of tasks and goals. I'm going to see if I can "feed" the program so to speak. I'll continue loops as normal and read up on this energy stuff a bit more while I play around with the sniper modules. If all goes well, I'll later see if I can amplify the modules and programming.

I feel wiped though, more so than yesterday. I did remember to eat but it's weird...I feel like I'm losing weight anyway, despite pigging out all day today. I still VERY much would like to smoke some herb but I've set a goal for myself instead; I won't take a toke until I've finished side A AND gotten at least five lay reports. Motivation baby!!!

Music of the Day: Keith Ape x Ski Mask TheSlumpGod - DR. EGGMAN

[ChocolateMilk]

Day 4-

So, been continuing the subs and noticed that the "manic" energy that I was getting off the subs has subsided (or perhaps I've just gotten used to it). Still early in my program though, so it may wax and wane as the weeks go by. I've come to realize that this program does require a lot of consideration as one is going through it; if you aren't attempting to come to terms with your own sexual expression and what you REALLY want, it will hinder your progress, I think.

My desire for women was ultimately holding me back from getting them: it was more fun and emotionally stimulating for me in the past to obsess, when I could have had the women that I wanted quite easily, if I had "pulled the trigger" when I instinctively felt the need to. Rather than doing that, I would climb inside my head as a way to keep myself from doing so and indulge in fantasies that were more "rewarding". It also caused me to miss a lot of details about what the girl(s) actually wanted, causing me to misread things.

I want to compensate for this "failure" by banging LOTS of women, which isn't healthy either. I was seeing relationships like "working out". If I just get "strong" enough, I can bang all the girls with the ease at which I lift weights.

That isn't the way life works, nor should I want it that way.

I want to have sex with women that I connect with, relationships of mutual enjoyment. A healthy and engaging sexual life with other people, that's what I want. Maybe I'm just greedy in that I want multiple partners, but the idea of a small circle of women (2-4) to have sex with appeals to me but, I don't know my limits, or the extent of my "lust", so I just have to take it as it comes and genuinely explore.

What is weird though, is that "bad habits" I thought I had kicked have started coming back in slight bursts over the past few days. Not to the extent they used to be but, it's kind of like old behaviors related to old issues are rising back as I deal with my own internal things.

Kind of sucks but I notice it's easier to stop myself...I'm more aware when I catch myself, to the point that I have started to be able to stop it before it "starts". Still, it is mentally taxing and I have started sleeping more as a result. Desire to go to the gym is at an all time low as well. Not too worried about it at the moment though.

As for any practical progress, I got the cute bartender's number. I can't do anything today though, since I have to stage at a new kitchen. Potential new job, potentially a lot more money in my pocket but less time. Right now, that would suit me just fine. Let the sub continue to do its work, save money, and work my ass off. It'll keep me from drinking and toking as well. Tomorrow is my buddy's birthday though, so I'll see if I can get her to come out.

Music of the Day- Lil Dicky - $ave Dat Money feat. Fetty Wap and Rich Homie Quan

[Light]

Day 4-

So, been continuing the subs and noticed that the "manic" energy that I was getting off the subs has subsided (or perhaps I've just gotten used to it). Still early in my program though, so it may wax and wane as the weeks go by. I've come to realize that this program does require a lot of consideration as one is going through it; if you aren't attempting to come to terms with your own sexual expression and what you REALLY want, it will hinder your progress, I think.

My desire for women was ultimately holding me back from getting them: it was more fun and emotionally stimulating for me in the past to obsess, when I could have had the women that I wanted quite easily, if I had "pulled the trigger" when I instinctively felt the need to. Rather than doing that, I would climb inside my head as a way to keep myself from doing so and indulge in fantasies that were more "rewarding". It also caused me to miss a lot of details about what the girl(s) actually wanted, causing me to misread things.

I want to compensate for this "failure" by banging LOTS of women, which isn't healthy either. I was seeing relationships like "working out". If I just get "strong" enough, I can bang all the girls with the ease at which I lift weights.

That isn't the way life works, nor should I want it that way.

I want to have sex with women that I connect with, relationships of mutual enjoyment. A healthy and engaging sexual life with other people, that's what I want. Maybe I'm just greedy in that I want multiple partners, but the idea of a small circle of women (2-4) to have sex with appeals to me but, I don't know my limits, or the extent of my "lust", so I just have to take it as it comes and genuinely explore.

What is weird though, is that "bad habits" I thought I had kicked have started coming back in slight bursts over the past few days. Not to the extent they used to be but, it's kind of like old behaviors related to old issues are rising back as I deal with my own internal things.

Kind of sucks but I notice it's easier to stop myself...I'm more aware when I catch myself, to the point that I have started to be able to stop it before it "starts". Still, it is mentally taxing and I have started sleeping more as a result. Desire to go to the gym is at an all time low as well. Not too worried about it at the moment though.

As for any practical progress, I got the cute bartender's number. I can't do anything today though, since I have to stage at a new kitchen. Potential new job, potentially a lot more money in my pocket but less time. Right now, that would suit me just fine. Let the sub continue to do its work, save money, and work my ass off. It'll keep me from drinking and toking as well. Tomorrow is my buddy's birthday though, so I'll see if I can get her to come out.

Music of the Day- Lil Dicky - $ave Dat Money feat. Fetty Wap and Rich Homie Quan

Thank you man for these words which summerize exactly my problems especially the part where you talk about obssession about women and misreading other women that are interested and willing to be with you. Dmsi helped a lot in my obssesiin about woman. It changed my behaviour. I used to go to places where there are women gatherings just because i am obssessed with that. Now i hate that and i am becoming rarer in those gatherings, which is slowly making me more attractive. I didnt not lose on sex either. And like you put it, i was just trying to compensate for something while i was trying to bang as many as possible. The only part for me that i cant sort out now, is that i do have 3 to 4 women constantly in my life but it is very taxing at all levels. If you let them know you are meeting other women, the yare jealous and cause you a lot of trouble and it is very taxing mentally. If you dont let them know you are cheating and you arebogged in shame and guilt ... to have one woman in my life is the most unnatural thing to me ever. I dont know how humanity decided to embrace this idea. I think this explains why there is so much cheating in the world going on.thank you man again for your very wise words