DMSI 3.1 A - CHANGES

[soulfly1]

Alot of the body composition is determined by the stress and tension held within the muscles. Reich called this 'Body armoring', but you will find references about it in feldenkrais and many other methods aswell. If the sub convinces the subconscious to release this tension than it could definately affect things such as posture, how the face looks, grimmaces, etc.

[Lucius]

I am wondering if this subliminal will eventually make us look more attractive by making us taller, giving us a bigger penis, making our faces have more symmetry etc....if it does holy shit.

Yeah I am wondering this same thing. Them's some pretty amazing "side effects", since none of them is directly specified. If it can cause side effects like that, what can't this technology do?

If people get these effects, you'll become rich very fast.

Now that you mentioned it, I noticed my face is having more symmetry. This is important to me because despite being told by several people that I'm good looking, I found it difficult to believe them due to being told I was ugly when I was a kid. For me to look in the mirror and acknowledge my handsomeness is a big plus.

I have more desire to go out and socialise but I did not this weekend. I had nothing planned, and it's cold and wet outside for me to go for a long walk.

I require less sleep. I have averaged about five hours of sleep the last few days. I had a cheap can (20p) of energy drink on Saturday at about 5 pm, and could not go to sleep until about 3 am. That might have contributed to me needing less sleep. That in itself is strange as I am hardly affected by caffeine. Normally, I could drink two cups of coffee and go straight to bed. I drink coffee just because I like the flavour, and energy drinks because I kind of like the disgusting taste lol.

[Lucius]

There has been nothing major for me to report since I last posted. I guess I have a pile of rubbish to be cleared as I am yet to notice IOIs, Well, I guess the positive in this is I am comfortable to look for iois even though I said I won't be looking.

I am becoming more of a morning person now. I slept a total of 5 hours yesterday and was up at 5:30 am. I did my morning routine and realised the importance of being a morning person when I saw I had a LOT of time to spare later in the day. Comparing my results to others, it worries a bit that I am not getting tired, but instead requiring less sleep.

I went to the the library later in the afternoon and noticed I was a bit disoriented. I would say I was almost on auto pilot, but the things I did were not related to women - I signed up for monthly donation to a charity even though I am not financially stable at the moment. At the library, I by mistakenly gave away a rare coin I was holding on to. It was not worth much, about 20x its face value max. I noticed it as soon as I handed the coin to the attendant, but wasn't too bothered to ask for it even though I had other coins in my wallet. In a shop on my way back, I had the impulse to get Old Spice Swagger body spray (never used it before), and shyte, that was a mistake! One spray of it when I got home and I swear it's the cause of the nasal congestion I am now suffering from. Thank goodness/no doubt it is cheap.

I went to government office today and the security guys treated with more respect than normal. When I was leaving they waved me goodbye and wished me a nice day. I'm not sure if this is the first time that has happened, or it's the first time of me noticing.

I spent the rest of day indoors, sneezing out the Old Spice I inhaled last night.

[Lucius]

I woke up this morning with a very strong feeling of oneitis for no one in particular. I could observe it as a ball inside of me, and notice it’s not helping me. On the contrary, it could be stopping me from moving forward. I wish I had the possibility to cut if off with a knife since I saw it as a parasite which had attached itself to my body and pretending to be beneficial to me. This feeling lasted for about an hour.

Later on, I observed that there are two types of women I am attracted to: those I I think I love(oneitis), and those I lust for. The former are typical Disney type relationships in my imaginations. I see ourselves holding hands while watching the sunset change to bright moonlight, and then change to a rising sun. Holidays in Paris, babies, and bla bla bla. Interestingly, I noticed I am not that sexually attracted to them. Kind of like a couple who have been together for many years and have lost their sex appeal even though they are still in love with each other. Weird shit!

The women I lust for are a different story. They are a bit older than me, and I have no interest in being in a relationship with them. I just want to F**K them!!! I can see ourselves being “animalistic” with each other, exploring the depths of our sexuality without guilt or shame, and go our separate ways after this exploration.

This is the first time this has become clear to me. Madonna-Whore complex, eh? Interestingly, even being an AFC I escalated unconsciously with some of these women I lusted for, even though I was too scared to take it to the next level. There is always a sexual tension when I meet these women. I am not talking about low quality women here, but women with respectable jobs in society, and some married to respectable men.

I am not sure about the origin of this, but I can now see that girls older than me have always shown an interest in me. Boy, was I dumb!! I have older sisters and most of their friends always went all girlie with me. They would get my number from my sisters and call me out of the blue just to say “Hi”! The more I think about it, the more I beat myself up for being an AFC and missing those clears signals. It reminds me a post from RTBoss a while back. I could relate to it then, but not at this present magnitude (I started using DMSI with V3).

ION, my appetite has dropped, but I consume insane amounts of water. For example, I consumed almost 5L of water on Sunday, but I was still thirsty when I went to bed. With all that water, I still did not get a clear urine. I did not drink that much water yesterday and today, but I still get way more thirsty than I normally am.

My laptop is faulty and I had to revive an old netbook. It is awfully slow even with Lubuntu. I can feel the frustration rising up within me but I can control it without even trying. Thanks DMSI,

[Lucius]

It's been a while since I last posted. Part of it is because of my messed up laptop (Thanks Windows 10 upgrade), and part of it is because there has not been anything concrete for me to report. However, I don't mind sounding like a broken record to say healing has been taking place, because it has.

I had a sad realisation the other day that the number of friends I have will probably drop significantly. I was very involved in the religious circle where I met most of my friends. Since I started using subs, I have matured in various ways, but it has not been blatant to them as DMSI has been. Now, I find it difficult to hold a conversation with them. Things I consider normal makes them go haywire - even over texts. We could be talking just about anything, or women especially, and when I share my perspective, they look at me like some sort of an alien. The problem is I don't even remember how I was before. I don't remember how I would say the "right things", so it's a mask which doesn't fit me anymore.

Looking back at my sub history, it seems the naturaliser has been hitting me harder than the other components of the subs. It's like having a mild form amnesia - the type I gladly welcome. I'm happier than I've been for a very long time despite certain challenges, and I will choose to be happy any day over anything else, so long as I don't infringe on anyone's freedom.

In women related news, I think I overcame the Madonna-***** complex I mentioned in my previous post. I don't see one as better or purer than the other. I just see them as women, and what matters is if we are compatible with each other. As an example of how I'm being affected by the naturaliser, I don't remember what this felt like. I read that portion in my last post and then try to replay it in my mind, but I just can't make the distinction (in feelings) anymore.

I went to a local grocery shop the other day and almost bumped into one the shop assistant - twice. Rather, she almost bumped into me as she was the one with the broad smile on her face walking towards me. Interestingly, I did not give it much though while there in the shop. I just carried on shopping.

Also, in that same shop, I noticed a girl not far behind me while I was filling my basket. I got to the till to pay and she was behind me. I left that shop and went into the next one, got to the till - and she was behind me. I paid and was walking home, got to a traffic light - and she was behind me.

Now you may be wondering if I did something about it, but I swear NOTHING registered to me until I got home. It's only when I was in my room doing something else that the whole shop incidents played in my head. It could be DMSI or coincidence. I just don't know because I was minding my business (and distracted on the phone as well) and was not even thinking about getting results from the sub. I did not even assess her beauty - just that there was a white girl in a brown wool jacket who seemed to be behind me all the time.

I'm still running version A, and I don't have the desire to switch to B at the moment.

[FREAK4LIFE]

It's been a while since I last posted. Part of it is because of my messed up laptop (Thanks Windows 10 upgrade), and part of it is because there has not been anything concrete for me to report. However, I don't mind sounding like a broken record to say healing has been taking place, because it has.

I had a sad realisation the other day that the number of friends I have will probably drop significantly. I was very involved in the religious circle where I met most of my friends. Since I started using subs, I have matured in various ways, but it has not been blatant to them as DMSI has been. Now, I find it difficult to hold a conversation with them. Things I consider normal makes them go haywire - even over texts. We could be talking just about anything, or women especially, and when I share my perspective, they look at me like some sort of an alien. The problem is I don't even remember how I was before. I don't remember how I would say the "right things", so it's a mask which doesn't fit me anymore.

Looking back at my sub history, it seems the naturaliser has been hitting me harder than the other components of the subs. It's like having a mild form amnesia - the type I gladly welcome. I'm happier than I've been for a very long time despite certain challenges, and I will choose to be happy any day over anything else, so long as I don't infringe on anyone's freedom.

In women related news, I think I overcame the Madonna-***** complex I mentioned in my previous post. I don't see one as better or purer than the other. I just see them as women, and what matters is if we are compatible with each other. As an example of how I'm being affected by the naturaliser, I don't remember what this felt like. I read that portion in my last post and then try to replay it in my mind, but I just can't make the distinction (in feelings) anymore.

I went to a local grocery shop the other day and almost bumped into one the shop assistant - twice. Rather, she almost bumped into me as she was the one with the broad smile on her face walking towards me. Interestingly, I did not give it much though while there in the shop. I just carried on shopping.

Also, in that same shop, I noticed a girl not far behind me while I was filling my basket. I got to the till to pay and she was behind me. I left that shop and went into the next one, got to the till - and she was behind me. I paid and was walking home, got to a traffic light - and she was behind me.

Now you may be wondering if I did something about it, but I swear NOTHING registered to me until I got home. It's only when I was in my room doing something else that the whole shop incidents played in my head. It could be DMSI or coincidence. I just don't know because I was minding my business (and distracted on the phone as well) and was not even thinking about getting results from the sub. I did not even assess her beauty - just that there was a white girl in a brown wool jacket who seemed to be behind me all the time.

I'm still running version A, and I don't have the desire to switch to B at the moment.

Dump the moral police or the religious police or speech police if they are trying to contain you and not letting your speak your mind.

Your views cannot be held hostage because it displeases them.

Make new friends who are in sync with your views or go solo.

[Benjamin]

But if it's religion then in the religion thread in the chatter box.

[Lucius]

Dump the moral police or the religious police or speech police if they are trying to contain you and not letting your speak your mind.

Your views cannot be held hostage because it displeases them.

Make new friends who are in sync with your views or go solo.

It's kind of sad but that is the way to go. One thing is certain, even if I go solo, I will not remain solo for a long time. Fun times ahead.

But if it's religion then in the religion thread in the chatter box.

Or here and just call it Rule 2+2

[Shannon]

Dump the moral police or the religious police or speech police if they are trying to contain you and not letting your speak your mind.

Your views cannot be held hostage because it displeases them.

Make new friends who are in sync with your views or go solo.

It's kind of sad but that is the way to go. One thing is certain, even if I go solo, I will not remain solo for a long time. Fun times ahead.

I did tell you that DMSI would do what was necessary to achieve it's goals...

[Lucius]

It's been while. I stopped listening to the sub on 15/01. Before that, I switched to version B and was on it for five days.

During my short time on B, I noticed I was uncomfortable but I could not put a finger on the source of the discomfort. I always try to consciously manage my emotions with or without subs. I could still do that during my time on B, but I noticed I had to try hard not to snap.

My sleep pattern returned to normal after I stopped. In fact, the week after felt like I had to recover all the time I stayed awake during DMSI. I would get up, run a few errands and go straight to bed as soon as I got home.

So far into the bloom phase, I have noticed an increase in confidence. Girls always look down when I make eye contact with them. I had strong urges to strike up conversations with random girls but I refused to act upon them (I've always had approach anxiety so this is a big plus). I'm going through a tough transitory period which I am very self-conscious of. Maybe I'm just using that as an excuse to not execute the script. Hopefully, I will get my shit together during V3.1.

With the confidence I got from running version B for five days, I am tempted to go straight to B when the next version is released. However, the emotional instability I felt indicated that there is more healing to be done.

[Lucius]

I stopped listening to version 3.0.1 on 15/01 in anticipation for the release of 3.1. However, I jumped back on it around 02/02 when I learned the release date of 3.1 had been postponed. I had been listening to subs for just under a year and it felt weird to go for long periods without listening to one. I guess it’s like sex. Guys who are yet to loss their v-cards, like myself, are more comfortable going through long periods of drought than guys who have lost it.

I noticed nothing outstanding during my second short run of 3.0.1, except for a day when I was out with a friend to have coffee and this guy, sitting two tables away from us with his friend, kept staring at me like I was with hitting on his daughter. Weird shit I tell ya.

I hopped off 3.0.1 again on 16/02 to give myself a break before 3.1. I started listening to 3.1 on 03/03.

I have been listening exclusively to the trickling stream hybrid since I started using DMSI. I had the urge to switch to a masked track on 3.0.1 but I thought it might have been resistance so I stuck with the hybrid. I had the same urge to use the masked version when I started 3.1 and I decided to give it a try after a week of hybrid.

For the effects, sorry to disappoint but no jiggy jiggy yet. However, I had a major breakthrough in a legal issue I had been battling for years. I can’t go into more details on that. I don’t know if it is DMSI related, but part of me think it is.

One of my housemates can’t keep his mouth shut. Damn! He normally likes to talk but it’s become insane since I started 3.1. I now try to avoid meeting him in the communal area. He also buys stuff for me when he goes shopping without me asking.

Another housemate brought his girl two days ago, and it triggered something buried within me. I became jealous and angry for no reason. Scratch that. I don’t know what the fuck I was feeling. At one point it felt like jealousy as he is considerably younger than me. Then it felt like fear/anxiety as I will be doing the same thing soon. Then it felt like anger for me being a “church boy” and not taking action earlier to lose my v-card despite the opportunities I had. I just cannot put my finger on it.

One week of the hybrid being over, I switched to the masked trickling stream yesterday. Oh boy, things went haywire! The weird feeling I had the day before went on steroids, and as if that was not enough, I was exhausted as fuck! I have never really experienced exhaustion on DMSI like others have. Instead my hours of sleep was shortened on the previous version and I did not lack energy for the rest of the day. This was not the case yesterday. I felt like I just came back from a hard workout. Eh... not really. I don't know how I felt. It felt like I was walking in another body or another reality. Just absolutely not my "normal" self.

To feel better, I tried to consciously tell myself healing was taking place subconsciously. Nope that did not work. I just felt like shit, and could do nothing about it.

Later in the evening I went for a walk while listening to 2Pac’s "Hit ‘em Up" full volume on repeat. Now that felt so good!!! It also helped me see that there’s so much repressed emotions inside of me. At one point I felt like I should roar like King Kong and let it all out. This is something I should definitely do. I once watched a video of Tony Robbins in which he tells a man he is a lion walking around like a sheep that’s why he was more womanly than his wife. He asked the man to roar and let the lion out, which he did, and would not stop roaring lmao. His wife later testified that her husband was another person that night. I wish I could find a place to do that. Maybe I will join a boxing club when I have mo' money. This way I can let it all out physically as well.

I felt better this morning, but only after I listened to Kanye’s “POWER” on repeat. It’s amazing what music does to the mind. Especially music from someone I hated initially. Now I understand him when he says his music is not him boasting about his achievements, but an encouragement to his fans to go out and make it big. (Something like that. I will have to search for the right quote).

ION, I was reluctant to update my journal because I thought I had nothing to write about. lol.

[Bookstacks DC737]

I believe the quote is: "If you're a fan of Kanye West, you're not a fan of my music - you're a fan of yourself, I'm just the espresso"

[Lucius]

I believe the quote is: "If you're a fan of Kanye West, you're not a fan of my music - you're a fan of yourself, I'm just the espresso"

Thank you, man. Yes, that is the quote I was looking for. He sure knows what he is talking about. While listening, I was so lost in the music I couldn't care less who the artist was.

[Lucius]

Nothing to report. Feeling much better after my last update.

My IDGAF mindset is breaking it's previous records.

[SNIP]

I wanna just hide in the house with the covers over my head and sleeeeeeeeeep. Because IDGAF.

IDGAF 5.5g.

I read Chaos' post and it reminded me of this guy's commentary. Now, that is the kind of IDGAF I want.