Aces High: A Maverick Journal

[Duke.Togo]

Interesting, this keeps getting me more interested in Maverick.

I've never been the one to follow 'conventional wisdom' and I think alot of what's going on in the world is absolutely ridiculous nor do I want to follow it.

The relationship part is a little challenging. I'm currently having some turbulence in my relationship of around 6 months because she wants to see me more and gave me a big talk of 'where is this going?' and that by now she's used to seeing a guy more than around once a week and that it doesn't seem to have progressed.

Whereas i'm happy with that, and i'm stepping up my own work on myself and my goals as i'm behind on that for a few reasons from what i've been through in the last 5 or so years.

And thinking about it more I don't think i'm prepared to compromise too much, I even asked if she wants to join my workout today so i'm still doing my thing but she gets to spend time with me. And i'm sitting here already annoyed and regretting it cos I could have had it done a few hours ago, moved onto other things and not have to wait another 1 1/2 hours to do it, and thinking "this is what I get for compromising".

But there is a sense of guilt and such, so that part of the mindset of Maverick does appeal to me.. as on one hand there's this "Ok don't I have to compromise a little bit, and find some ways to accomodate what she wants" and on the other hand it's "No i'm not going to compromise, because that's how men end up whipped and not doing shit".

And i'd actually prefer to move more towards the second mindset even though it will be uncomfortable.

I can definately see it would stir things up more. I remember experiencing that on AM6 with my whole friendship group.

At the point i'm at I don't think i'm quite ready for Maverick until I sort a few more things out, but there is this strong feeling of "Yes, this is for me.. not quite now but soon."

And all the mindsets presented are what I want to go towards. I'm at a point where yeah I 'might' need more healing, but that could also be partly avoidance.. because really I just need to move forward as i've left some things for way too long. That's the point i've been at recently.

Ben, I think you’re more than ready for what Maverick can do. While there isn’t any real healing with Maverick, I believe Shannon mentioned there is fear removal. 

Either way, in due time, Maverick will get you there irrespectively. You just need to give it the time to run. But I think you will definitely benefit from running this.