About's WM2.0 Journal

[LionMonkey]

Here's what I've learned about myself.

I'm a procrastinator. I don't like it, but I can't help and tell myself I'll change that about myself tomorrow, or later in the day. See my issue there?

Recently I started talking to my ex again. I don't know, she's engaged already but nothing in her concerns me. I've had a few chances to sleep with her yesterday but I think i'm over her in that way, but hanging out with her definitely made me remember more why I liked her in the first place (and now I remind myself why we split up in the first place).

Anyway, the procrastination, I can't help it. Here's what I want to have:

I want to be able to put myself out there more, socially, and meet more people, but I find myself making excuses as to why I don't make more friends, and they usually go along the lines of I don't really like them. That and maybe this is an excuse too, but I don't make friends easily because I don't really like them.

I want to market myself. I am a clinical - orthopedic massage therapist and I want to work for myself or as an independent contractor, I do not want to work for someone else much longer despite currently working in one of the best places I could possibly be.

And of course this goes along with the first one, I ideally want to meet that "one" person that I would like to just end up with forever and I think it can happen, but then aren't I really setting myself up for failure because I'm not looking to enjoy the journey with whoever else falls on my path? I don't know. My brain is a mess and I'm trying to figure it out.

Change is a decision and sticking with it.

I don't have many friends either. Most of them were from childhood and the new ones are the ones on the same path as me. I find them strange and crazy but I know they are good guys after having spent time with them.

I think it's more about experiencing around with getting different friends and make some effort to build a friendship. Then you'll be more sure of what kind of qualities you like in a friend and you'll have a much easier time to go after establishing a new friendship.
Much the same with women.. just without the sex ;-P