day 75 ( 21 days remain + ?? )
Listening to trickling stream and so much is happening right now. I for once was/am confused and had an spike in fears regarding talking to girls, closing and all of that stuff. My head is all foggy aswell. I somehow sense its already being overcome and an shift may take place in all of this. I feel pretty amazing right now, but it still feels like somethign being avoided, like its almost some comfortzone thing to not have to interact and find some safety in the whole attraction/magnet thing. When I do introspection, something deep is worked on and I sense all may break lose eventually. I have done it before and it is almost like an shutdown compulsion. I have escalated before and touch and all of that is no point at all. Its just the ocasional social programming and thoughts that pop up. Sexual limited thoughts is not really a problem aswell and am indulging in them by crossing over so to say. Countering them. Its more of the walk up escalation so to say, but this will be dealt with aswell. Entitlement, attraction, eye contact, seduction, confidence. Pull the trigger. its all obvious.
had breakthroughs yesterday in terms of polarization and breaking away from society and its programming. I had an sense of going away, of going inward, of taking an 180 degree turn, which reminded me of Sigma. It was an conscious mind flooding, what happens when the sub breaks through. Its that raw, confident and sure feeling and the sub going deeper and other, new directions, aswell as shedding some layers. The other side of the coin.
When the sub gains even more dominance all will be eventually dealt with. Right now I feel like facing an wall.
Im close to an breakthrough it seems. An surge, thoughts of her being manhandled, needing an daddy and what not, escalating and shift in attitude. Its the familiar feeling of the sub taking over. Its pretty raw, sexual and seductive. The pattern is getting more clear as it mostly was in my head regarding the tesnion and the wall. whatever. Going to do other stuff. pretty inspired currently.
Listening to trickling stream and so much is happening right now. I for once was/am confused and had an spike in fears regarding talking to girls, closing and all of that stuff. My head is all foggy aswell. I somehow sense its already being overcome and an shift may take place in all of this. I feel pretty amazing right now, but it still feels like somethign being avoided, like its almost some comfortzone thing to not have to interact and find some safety in the whole attraction/magnet thing. When I do introspection, something deep is worked on and I sense all may break lose eventually. I have done it before and it is almost like an shutdown compulsion. I have escalated before and touch and all of that is no point at all. Its just the ocasional social programming and thoughts that pop up. Sexual limited thoughts is not really a problem aswell and am indulging in them by crossing over so to say. Countering them. Its more of the walk up escalation so to say, but this will be dealt with aswell. Entitlement, attraction, eye contact, seduction, confidence. Pull the trigger. its all obvious.
had breakthroughs yesterday in terms of polarization and breaking away from society and its programming. I had an sense of going away, of going inward, of taking an 180 degree turn, which reminded me of Sigma. It was an conscious mind flooding, what happens when the sub breaks through. Its that raw, confident and sure feeling and the sub going deeper and other, new directions, aswell as shedding some layers. The other side of the coin.
When the sub gains even more dominance all will be eventually dealt with. Right now I feel like facing an wall.
Im close to an breakthrough it seems. An surge, thoughts of her being manhandled, needing an daddy and what not, escalating and shift in attitude. Its the familiar feeling of the sub taking over. Its pretty raw, sexual and seductive. The pattern is getting more clear as it mostly was in my head regarding the tesnion and the wall. whatever. Going to do other stuff. pretty inspired currently.
The trials you encounter will introduce you to your strengths. - epictetus
