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+--- Thread: ASC 5g journal (/Thread-ASC-5g-journal)
ASC 5g journal - Kol - 01-09-2016
This is my first journal of ASC 5g,
Currently i am 32 days in and the changes are obvious. Im still not where I want to be, as I have still instances of worry, doubt and outcome dependance. Therefore i will run ASC atleast another month.
The changes thus far are;
- Militant erect to the point of cockyness, my voice has been changed, my bodylanguage has been changed, im more solid in my presence. Im purpose. No dips in my speaking. getting aware of very subtle changes at once. There is some other confidence close and sensed just beyond this, of an deeper and more solid quality.
- Getting IOIs everywhere. The girl at work pushed her ass almost in my face. other people wave at me in cars, woman get in trance. some try to keep eye contact ( aware or unaware ) but fail. Eye comntact gets more and more firm and asc influences it when im paying attention to it. Im playing with eye contact communication only and its different "modes"
- Im not hung up at people giving me eye contact back, I own it up. neediness has been very much reduced. Standards go up, porn interest has been reduced, girls interest has been reduced, Im thrown back at myself whichb feels very attractive. I can easily say that some "hot girls" are nothing special in an playfull and cocky way without breaking eye contact.
- Im getting waves of euphoria still. Im changing right now.
- Im getting more laid back, less bothered, rejection doesnt hurt any longer.
- the concept of strangers is dissolving, the gap of approach is gone. yesterday of day 31 I was totally free for a moment and the world was literally in the palm of my hand.
- in week 3 my speaking became poetic, the words become very charismatic. Im still reading on mystery and watching some videos which put me right in some sort of frame so to say.
- only after day 26 my tiredness became lesser and still when the sub hits something deep i getb tired again. yesterday was such an moment that i felt the sub working and some sort of war went on.
What i still do experience is very much anger and confusion, agitation and iritation. Anger becomes more of an companion and is very helpfull in breaking more limitations. There is an huge lake of supressed anger, hostility, standing up for myself and boundaries. Reading about being alpha male clicks naturally. Im pretty sure there is loads of garbage of layers and my core is alpha in the end.
I do go in my head at times, but acknowledging this puts me right back in the now. all is possible. this will be dealt with. undoubtly. [/b]
RE: ASC 5g journal - LionKing - 01-09-2016
Cool, good luck! Probably best to continue for the "full" 3 months, so the results become "normal" to you, and you'll reinforce them even without the sub. If I can ask, how much are you listening, have you done any subs before, and about how old are you?
RE: ASC 5g journal - Kol - 01-09-2016
(01-09-2016, 03:40 AM)LionKing Wrote: Cool, good luck! Probably best to continue for the "full" 3 months, so the results become "normal" to you, and you'll reinforce them even without the sub. If I can ask, how much are you listening, have you done any subs before, and about how old are you?
I'm currently 26. I have some experiences with subliminals but not with the intensity of Shannon's subliminals. It keeps pretty much shifting my world.
I'm listening between 14-18 hours I guess.
RE: ASC 5g journal - Kol - 01-10-2016
Day 32
The last few days i notice an increase in focus and drive. Im getting even more confident then i was before. What used to cause tension and anxiety is pretty much gone. Im getting waves of wanting to approach people even more strongly. It feels very automatic. Im getting more in an active position instead of mere bystander. each limit is seen as something that can be overcome and shoudl be tested.
Im pretty sure im turning into an approach machine.
Plans are formed in my mind but nothing concrete in terms of jobs. wearing suits is appealing. I notice how people respond different to me in conversation. I hold eye contact even longer which is interesting. My bodylanguage is open and I tried to see if I could take on an close posture but this didnt work.
Im beginning to fall in acceptance, an trust in ASC. I dont have to prove myself any longer i can hold eye contact with people, it just happens naturally and autmatically. I naturally establish dominance but not in an loud kind of way. Its my presence, my being.
When I went to the gasstation, some guys which I clasify as typical around here, which used to somehow cause an reaction in me, looked directly away, i was absolutely solid. Conversations go even more fluid.
Sexuality is affected. Im my first post I wrote how the sub seems to cause an reduction in interest in girls, porn and sex in general and throws it back on myself. I notice one moment i can be very attracted and basically am "whatever, i will take you both" while the next moment it just doesnt do it for me, even to the point of strong dislike in an cocky way and shutted down disinterest. This involves an strong eye gazing aswell, an sort of lock trance kind of thing.
I have images in my head pop up about owning the place and inviting myself in, in places. being the top dog, the alpha. Being the one setting the frame and owning, being the dominant one in an natural way. connecting, leader of man, that kind of stuff. Its in an bar aswell, or atleast the setting is like that.
Im thinking back to where I came from and how much I have changed. I used to fall into other peoples frames till the point of suffering out of surviving, which eventually led to breakdown. Now, ASC corrects me, it attacks those former situations and pushes me right on the spot, causing an aggressive response inside towards such damaging patterns.
I chatted up with an old friend. I also have an 10 year plan in mind but its nothing concrete yet.
Another thing I notice is that I feel light, as in, less garbage, which seem to be an effect through clearing the subconscious by the sub.
Day 33
Today is day 33. I had lots of dreams which i still sense but cannot recall. I woke up multiple times with my earbuds out and listened to trickling stream. Im driven, like solid and foussed.
RE: ASC 5g journal - Kol - 01-10-2016
I experience loads of agitation, anger, resentment and just plain old restlessness. Today is an flip-flop kind of day. Not much activity going on to fill my day but to let the ultrasonic do its thing while watching series. I seem to have also lots of sexual supression going on, although im not a virgin and am familiar with relationship. All I seem to put my focus on seems to grow, including the dissolvement of limitations. Its as if ASC becomes some sort of tool that can help dissolve limits. I had strong feelings of expression such as "i would pin you against the wall"kind of attitude which seems new but I like this kind of attitude.
It sure did push me the last days in the unknown. When things go smooth and when it all flows my attitude consists of some head-on wanting to be over with and ready to face more. But when actually there im getting all frustrated, depressed and just fed up. I should let ASC just run its course. Sure lots of felings are coming to the surface currently but the reward afterwards will be sweet.
The restlessness still continues. My only guess is that ASC hits some deep subconscious stuff. Im very tired and just fed up right now.
RE: ASC 5g journal - hiddenalias - 01-10-2016
(01-09-2016, 02:05 AM)Kol Wrote: This is my first journal of ASC 5g,
Currently i am 32 days in and the changes are obvious. Im still not where I want to be, as I have still instances of worry, doubt and outcome dependance. Therefore i will run ASC atleast another month.
The changes thus far are;
- Militant erect to the point of cockyness, my voice has been changed, my bodylanguage has been changed, im more solid in my presence. Im purpose. No dips in my speaking. getting aware of very subtle changes at once. There is some other confidence close and sensed just beyond this, of an deeper and more solid quality.
- Getting IOIs everywhere. The girl at work pushed her ass almost in my face. other people wave at me in cars, woman get in trance. some try to keep eye contact ( aware or unaware ) but fail. Eye comntact gets more and more firm and asc influences it when im paying attention to it. Im playing with eye contact communication only and its different "modes"
- Im not hung up at people giving me eye contact back, I own it up. neediness has been very much reduced. Standards go up, porn interest has been reduced, girls interest has been reduced, Im thrown back at myself whichb feels very attractive. I can easily say that some "hot girls" are nothing special in an playfull and cocky way without breaking eye contact.
- Im getting waves of euphoria still. Im changing right now.
- Im getting more laid back, less bothered, rejection doesnt hurt any longer.
- the concept of strangers is dissolving, the gap of approach is gone. yesterday of day 31 I was totally free for a moment and the world was literally in the palm of my hand.
- in week 3 my speaking became poetic, the words become very charismatic. Im still reading on mystery and watching some videos which put me right in some sort of frame so to say.
- only after day 26 my tiredness became lesser and still when the sub hits something deep i getb tired again. yesterday was such an moment that i felt the sub working and some sort of war went on.
What i still do experience is very much anger and confusion, agitation and iritation. Anger becomes more of an companion and is very helpfull in breaking more limitations. There is an huge lake of supressed anger, hostility, standing up for myself and boundaries. Reading about being alpha male clicks naturally. Im pretty sure there is loads of garbage of layers and my core is alpha in the end.
I do go in my head at times, but acknowledging this puts me right back in the now. all is possible. this will be dealt with. undoubtly. [/b]
What make n model stereo-speaker are you using to listen to ASC?
RE: ASC 5g journal - Kol - 01-11-2016
Im using Juster ac-691n speakers.
day 34
Woke up very sharp and confident after playing the wave track whole night op louder volume through earbuds, as it worked yesterday evening with helping overcoming what was surfacing. I can feel the wave track wash over and work on deep underlying issues. My head gets light when it happens, pleasantly trance like.
Worries before are losing their strengths and seem far away and less and less existent. Its replaced with confidence.
My confidence is growing in many different ways. the badboy attitude seem to lose interest and another deeper confidence is taking place. I still can take on the badboy image if i wanted but an shift is going on.
Im more centered in myself. I will not let myself be sucked into other peoples reality because they cant handle me. Its selection. value.
Im having an growing interest in the overcoming fear subliminal. I have an sense that it will help me with lots although I planned to do AM 6.0 after this sub.
Im feeling really at ease with myself right now. Zen. Content.
The masked wave track is playing as I write this.
Yesterday some patterns and thoughts came up about hesitation. It Always seem to start with an awareness of these patterns. My interest towards Overcoming fear seems to stem from this. Its fear of escalating at work with woman for some reason. ASC has me pushed 2 days ago into an state of "i can do absolutely anything" and full alignment.
I'm letting go
RE: ASC 5g journal - Kol - 01-12-2016
yesterday was....interesting.
For some reason when I arrived at work this one girl made an snarky comment and threw me in full on beta modus. It was pretty much internal but her comment did strike an nerve and the old "dont say anything or.."stemming from the past came full on back. My mood swinged from self censoring, to anger but the mask did not fall off. I did not like it, I felt blocked and was very much sucked in outcome dependence. I felt pretty needy. I did read about re-framing the whole thing, and changing how receiving such attitude but this didnt hold. It was all pretty much depressing to the point I went in conflict. This was beyond moody and i could barely handle it. For some reaosn my eye contact was less touched by all of this, even when I got angry, I still made eye contact and scanned with people.
Went home eventually and read on John Alexanders "how to become an alpha male"great read by the way, while listening to ASC ultrasonic.
Later that day came in contact with old contacts. I have been an smoker for 7 years and ASC seems to block most substance intentions, like it says "no". makes sense as Im adopting healthy lifestyle lately and picking up elements of that. It just is compatible and gives some weird effects even when Im not running ASC at that moment.
I didnt let anyone set the frame. I did notice instances of validation seeking but furthermore I was pretty much in the zone and being leader was picked up by the people around me. Everyone in sight became an social source and I was filled with urges to approach. the gap closed. Also, words lost value, not so hung up on words. This seems to be something big, more playfull. At one point at said friends house, I asked if there is some event in town, so I could go socialize. I knew I would succeed, there was not an single doubt in my mind at all that I would succeed.
I felt incredibly euphoric, attractive and seductive. I indentified some inner abstract self image. I oozed attraction when I looked in the mirror. No-one could hold eye contact and they broke of first, while before I was the one that didnt even could make eye contact to begin with.
I felt very light aswell, like, no thought.
Im still struggling with censoring at times, it is not consistent, like ASC hasnt claimed full ground in my subconscious yet, resulting in censoring, limitations and slight depression, the annoyance is there which may be an sign. Like some wall is holding me back. Even on these forums. This external permission seeking and validation sucks. Clearly some inner issues. When ASC kicks in fully, these issues seem to be absent. Relax.
RE: ASC 5g journal - Kol - 01-12-2016
day 35
The depression is back. ASC has to be really working. Im pretty much fed up by everything right now and seem to be unable to release it. Im really tired and its as if I face an solid wall that is firm in place and just keeps me imprisoned. How much i want to release it and let go, this wall seems to be unmovable and im getting pretty angry over it. All attempts to release it is met with an fear, all genuine realness is met with feelings of backlash. Im feeling like crap and am pissed off at everyone and the world in general maybe. As an result i seem to cancel stuff which I really shouldnt. isolation is not something that I enjoy at all and want to avoid. Spend to much dealing with isolation.
I want this day to be over with although it started pretty much okay. people do fall in trance with me and want to be noticed by me, its very Obvious. My mindset seems to change besides the depression to maybe more seductive and softened. i have an weak spot for discipline somehow and am order-minded.
Im just fed up with it and with bullshit.
RE: ASC 5g journal - apollolux - 01-12-2016
You've reached the Anger stage of ASC: you feel like you're doing extra work to make up for other people's deficiencies and are angry that they aren't and therefore your external results don't jive with your expectations. It's very difficult to reach Acceptance on ASC (I'm still not there yet, but I have a mountain to climb there), but it is achievable.
The depression may or may not have always been there, but it's definitely amplified by the ASC. Look for a reliable support system to help you through it, don't go through it alone if you can help it. If I had one I'd feel much further along in NY progress.
RE: ASC 5g journal - Kol - 01-13-2016
(01-12-2016, 10:28 AM)apollolux Wrote: You've reached the Anger stage of ASC: you feel like you're doing extra work to make up for other people's deficiencies and are angry that they aren't and therefore your external results don't jive with your expectations. It's very difficult to reach Acceptance on ASC (I'm still not there yet, but I have a mountain to climb there), but it is achievable.
The depression may or may not have always been there, but it's definitely amplified by the ASC. Look for a reliable support system to help you through it, don't go through it alone if you can help it. If I had one I'd feel much further along in NY progress.
I felt like an animal in an cage tbh, unable to express anything. Its like old programming keeping me in check, the outcome that I may offend someone. Its total irrational. I dont give an shit really. It seems only to surface the last couple of days and makes me wonder how deep this is ingrained as some sort of survival strategy. i dont need it anymore. the best moments where those in an state of total destruction of outcome where stuff loses its grip. yes it makes me very angry at everything aswell as feeling sad. Your post makes definitely sense.
RE: ASC 5g journal - Kol - 01-13-2016
day 36
Woke up and left me wondering about ASC and how natural it may be to the point I dont even notice it working. I do notice how its there when I stop thinking about it and let it run its course. There is no need to push it but to sink into it, to let it run its course. do not try to interfere or control the sub!
Eventually the program will find its way and will deal with very deep subconscious programming. certain initiations of attitude may amplify the subliminal though, like some trigger. I need to let go and let it run its course. To let the sub overrun me. yesterday I noticed some sort of warm feeling in my body and chest area.
My voice do seems to get louder and more strongly projecting aswell.
Dressing and appearance aswell get more attention and is put under an scope.
Im conflicting in my thoughts. I notice how i cling to them and that there is no right way to think but to see them as just thoughts. It does stirr up feelings inside, some sadness.
RE: ASC 5g journal - Kol - 01-13-2016
Had to write this down just for the record as there seems to be an big shift happening in confidence and other areas in my life.
Im no longer going to test eye contact. that stuff is solid. ASC will cover that and will improve. i need to let it go and trust in the sub more. yes, I have strong tension in my body surfacing still, Im having actual flashbacks which stirs up anger.This anger seems to be supressed anger and an reliving of childhood emotions. I still notice how they interfere in everyday life. There is an shift going on in attitude towards limitations and I notice how this is familiar. Its when ASC kicks in and the confidence is stronger then the old programming. An get over with 0 outcome dependence. Self censoring is met with an view of futility and annoyance, an anger and impulse to get over with it.
ASC works strong on the spot. When i was out today at the grocery store I dominated, all that held back was directly dealt with instantly. social conversation went even more fluid. Its an idgaf attitude right in the zone.
My libido seems to be dead. It takes more to be actually aroused. perhaps its due some needyness being dealt with. Its just nothing right now except when I actually activate it and get aroused, then I want to escalate and it is very primal and dominant. Other then that, im getting really confident. Its waiting for an breakthrough and ASC taking full ground. pretty sweet. Im feeling important and radiate importance, its unshakable.
I cleaned up my home yesterday. It was absolutely needed. This discipline is really kicking in.
Old qualities are replaced with new ones. self assurance, self validating, power, control. My outlook is changing. No longer wanting validation nor acceptance.Im self-sufficent. Im way more capable of dealing. I would hesitate with posting and doubt would creep up. I have to post this right now. its absolute. I have an focus and pay attention closer instead of being scattered al over. I give attention.
Im the centre. I make eye contact with everyone. I dont care about the outcome. eyes meet, and thats about it.
I have vision. I have choice. I can choose to stand alone or to use social resource all around me. There is no gap. I do have instances of not feeling it and not being able to put myself to it, just out of sheer disinterest.
I have plans and this seem to become an reality. The feeling is strong and those plans may manifest soon. Its an process set into motion. I attract. I will look for jobs that suit me and I will succeed in this.
Progression plays an big part in my life now, time spending, potential and thinking about the human race in general, and how it evolves.
Today is an good day.
RE: ASC 5g journal - Kol - 01-14-2016
Dealing with some fears and anxieties again, one of them is posting online. I feel resistance as I type this. My guess is that the anxieties are tied to some trauma or something. yesterday evening the sub seemed to work on some deep rooted issue. I felt it literally in my head and body ( waves track ) Playing it loud stonewalls whatever is there.
On other news, my Phone anxiety is gone. I walked very confident through the house, doing some stuff beside it, being relaxed.
I aswell am questioning the journalling as it can turn in some obsessive thing like it did in the past. This is an confidence issue. I am in control about this, which feels good. I feel liberated.
I can only trust in the sub and let go/release whatever arises.